If sex was a crime!

[LovesToWet 3,803]

This is just for fun. How long would you be in jail for? 

I'd be lock up for 49 years

[Rosita 630]

37 years. Oh hell 😂

[Bacardi 10,134]

34 years. For someone who is asexual, that's quite a lot lol. I gave myself the 5 years for the sex tape for the pee audio/video I record. Because I literally consider it to be a sex tape 🤣

[Sexismygod 1,782]

I'm obviously a reprobate ... I'll be put away for 53 years.

A lifetime sentence for a lifetime of fun.  Not unreasonable 😂

[gldenwetgoose 21,498]

It's a great find, and thanks for sharing.

I can't help but think though, it's been put together by someone with a very vanilla view of sex (and who was possibly a virgin).

I mean, the whole premise of sex being a crime - and you really can't win if there's time to be served for lights on AND lights off ???    Then the penalties for the bed you don't own and whilst drunk - who of us hasn't had a holiday hotel drunken shag?  That's nine or ten whole years in one go, maybe fifteen if it's someone you picked up in the hotel bar.

Most enlightening though is the complete avoidance of anything fetish - yes sex with toys and owning toys are on there, but what about sentences for actual fetish sex.... bruising, drawing blood, being bound, cosplay and of course golden sex.

I do notice the nearly non-existent penalty for watching porn and absolutely nothing for masturbation (referring to my virgin comment above).

 

PS - anyone want to help me improve on 42 years.   A three-or-moresome including some same-sex friends, outdoors whilst being taped seems a reasonable starting point. 

[LovesToWet 3,803]

20 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Anyone want to help me improve on 42 years.   A three-or-moresome including some same-sex friends, outdoors whilst being taped seems a reasonable starting point. 

I'm sure me and plenty of others on here will be more than willing to help you out gaining more points. I'm definitely up for the 3 or more 😉😉

 

And yes, it was probably made up by someone who's had a boring sex life so far

[Kupar 13,341]

27 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

PS - anyone want to help me improve on 42 years.   A three-or-moresome including some same-sex friends, outdoors whilst being taped seems a reasonable starting point. 

I'm inside for the rest of my life, put it that way. So I might as well be hung for a sheep as for a lamb... 

[mickymoist 3,515]

5 years for 'in a bed neither of you own' if you rent an apartment that's harsh! 😃

35 for me, most of my crimes were a long time ago, can I get off with time served?

[Kupar 13,341]

11 minutes ago, mickymoist said:

... can I get off with time served?

Whatever gets you off I guess 😉 

[Qwertyboy 189]

4 years yikes

[Maclir 1,060]

63 years.  I'm a bad, bad man.

[LovesToWet 3,803]

1 hour ago, Qwertyboy said:

4 years yikes

REALLY? Lol

[REBob 140]

51 years! 

Would love to tick threesome and same sex off that list though

[Bacardi 10,134]

5 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

PS - anyone want to help me improve on 42 years.   A three-or-moresome including some same-sex friends, outdoors whilst being taped seems a reasonable starting point. 

I was like here comes Goose with his long winded, highly detailed and technical explanations but once I got here I was relieved lol. 

I got you for sex with friends and three or more if we find a third person 🤣 @Kupar maybe. Then you can cross off three at once!

[Maclir 1,060]

Well, there were only 2 that I missed, before 18 (too late to cross t hat off now) and same sex.

[Sophie 24,412]

41 years.

I've been a bad girl...

[LovesToWet 3,803]

10 hours ago, REBob said:

51 years! 

Would love to tick threesome and same sex off that list though

MMF threesome and your sorted.

And that's the 2 I'd love to tick off aswell

[REBob 140]

1 hour ago, LovesToWet said:

MMF threesome and your sorted.

And that's the 2 I'd love to tick off aswell

Easier say than done, I fear....

[LovesToWet 3,803]

10 minutes ago, REBob said:

Easier say than done, I fear....

You are right there. Sadly I think a threesome will just remain a fantasy of mine

[gldenwetgoose 21,498]

12 hours ago, Bacardi said:

I was like here comes Goose with his long winded, highly detailed and technical explanations but once I got here I was relieved lol. 

I got you for sex with friends and three or more if we find a third person 🤣 @Kupar maybe. Then you can cross off three at once!

Your plane ticket is in the post @Bacardi

Hmmm...  Wonder how many years you could add for mile-high wet sex with an airline pilot?

 

7 hours ago, Sophie said:

41 years.

I've been a bad girl...

Barely half way to the total sentence - 6/10 Must Try Harder.

I'm kidding of course, you're perfectly naughty. 🥰

[Qwertyboy 189]

17 hours ago, LovesToWet said:

REALLY? Lol

yeah, im not getting any action

[Hightower 607]

On 1/27/2023 at 7:58 AM, LovesToWet said:

This is just for fun. How long would you be in jail for? 

I'd be lock up for 49 years

31 or 34 depending on how you count owning sex toys! I've bought them but for someone else. 

Sex while high I've counted but it's also questionable, had sex after a couple of keys of coke but having sex with pilly willy would be like trying to play snooker with your shoelace

 

[LukeDZ 47]

Well that's worrying, scored 59. 🤣