Guys, we need to talk...

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

I've just been browsing through the new introductions as I often do...   and fellow guys here, have a word with yourselves - look in a mirror, think for a moment.

Yes, many of us are into ladies peeing, many of us are delighted when a new lady member joins.  But guys, think for a moment. I've just now read comments on there "you can pee on me anytime"...   "would love to hear and see you pee".    Fine that may be what you're thinking, but would you say that to a lady in the street or in a bar, you know nothing about them or their interests.

Newsflash - not every person is into exhibitionism or golden showers. For many people this fetish has been deeply hidden and suppressed for a long time. Many people will be nervous when they join.  Even if not, remember there's all sorts of people here - some very much into practising and enjoying their fetish in private.  You're not on a pro porn chat site, these aren't pro girls paid to make you horny. These are everyday people just like you and me.   Fine, you may be just wishing for someone to perv at you - but can you imagine how uncomfortable that may sound coming from a stranger?  Most countries have laws against it in real life.

Ever wondered why ladies join, post an intro - then you bombard them with chat and then they get cold feet and leave?

And whilst I'm ranting - a lady joins and declares herself as mature, you're not interested - a lady puts her age as less than 30 and you're trying to get straight in her pants...

So guys - give it a rest with the macho thing, just say hi and welcome - anything more is unnecessary and unhelpful.

 

And ladies of all ages, preferences and tastes - I apologise on behalf of my less subtle friends.

[Sophie 24,410]

Just to add on to this, if anyone is pestering you or making you feel uncomfortable, please report it! If you click the report button the staff get a notification about it, you can add a little comment to us etc. We will look into it. 

Nobody should be made uncomfortable or unwelcome here. We are a friendly community open to anyone and everyone who has an interest in the wet world, regardless of your age, gender, size, shape, experience, confidence etc. If you like pee, you are as welcome here as everyone else. We're all in the same boat. 

Guys, I know it can be easy to get excited and think with the head in your pants instead of the one on your shoulders but remember the human . Think before you post. If a gorgeous woman walked into a bar would you immediately hound her and ask for her phone number? Of course you wouldn't. So please don't do that here. It's amazing we have so many wonderful people wanting to be part of our community and the last thing we want is to scare them off. 

Finally, I know this doesn't apply to everyone, I'm not painting everyone with the same brush. 99% of you are fantastic and for that I thank you, keep it up. 

[steve25805 126,015]

Very well said, both @gldenwetgoose and @Sophie

And I would further back up Sophie's comments. If anyone makes you feel uncomfortable, report it, and the first mod or Admin on the scene will look into it.

You can even PM a mod if you want to. One of us - Sophie - is a female in case you'd prefer to speak to a lady.

[Ms. Tito 2,396]

Yeah!

[Wolf187 185]

18 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

I've just been browsing through the new introductions as I often do...   and fellow guys here, have a word with yourselves - look in a mirror, think for a moment.

Yes, many of us are into ladies peeing, many of us are delighted when a new lady member joins.  But guys, think for a moment. I've just now read comments on there "you can pee on me anytime"...   "would love to hear and see you pee".    Fine that may be what you're thinking, but would you say that to a lady in the street or in a bar, you know nothing about them or their interests.

Newsflash - not every person is into exhibitionism or golden showers. For many people this fetish has been deeply hidden and suppressed for a long time. Many people will be nervous when they join.  Even if not, remember there's all sorts of people here - some very much into practising and enjoying their fetish in private.  You're not on a pro porn chat site, these aren't pro girls paid to make you horny. These are everyday people just like you and me.   Fine, you may be just wishing for someone to perv at you - but can you imagine how uncomfortable that may sound coming from a stranger?  Most countries have laws against it in real life.

Ever wondered why ladies join, post an intro - then you bombard them with chat and then they get cold feet and leave?

And whilst I'm ranting - a lady joins and declares herself as mature, you're not interested - a lady puts her age as less than 30 and you're trying to get straight in her pants...

So guys - give it a rest with the macho thing, just say hi and welcome - anything more is unnecessary and unhelpful.

 

And ladies of all ages, preferences and tastes - I apologise on behalf of my less subtle friends.

 

15 hours ago, Sophie said:

Just to add on to this, if anyone is pestering you or making you feel uncomfortable, please report it! If you click the report button the staff get a notification about it, you can add a little comment to us etc. We will look into it. 

Nobody should be made uncomfortable or unwelcome here. We are a friendly community open to anyone and everyone who has an interest in the wet world, regardless of your age, gender, size, shape, experience, confidence etc. If you like pee, you are as welcome here as everyone else. We're all in the same boat. 

Guys, I know it can be easy to get excited and think with the head in your pants instead of the one on your shoulders but remember the human . Think before you post. If a gorgeous woman walked into a bar would you immediately hound her and ask for her phone number? Of course you wouldn't. So please don't do that here. It's amazing we have so many wonderful people wanting to be part of our community and the last thing we want is to scare them off. 

Finally, I know this doesn't apply to everyone, I'm not painting everyone with the same brush. 99% of you are fantastic and for that I thank you, keep it up. 

I argee completely, 

it can be vary hard for someone to come forward and be open with this fetish.. And most people don't want to be hounded with post like that during a introduction..

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

It's a while since my initial rant and on the whole things seem to have been good - well done guys.

 

Today's grumble though - another pet hate of mine - "You should have videoed yourself....."  or something similar shallow.

Like, sometimes it takes people a lot of courage to do something naughty. Maybe peeing in public, taking a risk of being caught and exposed, maybe peeing on a bus or train, maybe in a pub or a doorway. They've finally been brave enough to do it - then there's the matter of being brave enough to tell us about it. The first time they've shared anything this naughty maybe...

And the first reaction we give them:- "you should have videoed it.",  " I'd love to see that." " I wish I could have watched."

Newsflash time again - not everyone wants an audience. Not everyone wants to show their most intimate moment.   We're not paid porn stars here, we're normal everyday people with a common link.  Let's celebrate with people trying something new, let's encourage them, tell them how awesome their description was - but not immediately ask for something they haven't offered to give.

Tell me to wind my neck in if I'm wrong - or let's discuss.

[Gramps61 50]

As a newbie here, less than a week or so, I agree.  I'm Male and kept my fetish hidden/secret for nearly 5 decades and only recently disclosed it to my wife who was/is very supportive and has participated in "some" aspects of it.....golden shower, no face, holding onto me while I peed.  That's the extent of it, and I have no doubt that if she wants to explore it any further she'll ask questions, but for the time being I am elated as I was very fearful she wouldn't have been accepting of it or worse.  Prior to this I never disclosed it to anyone, not even my ex spouse of 7 years.

The very reason I joined was because I stumbled across this site quite by accident and having been recently liberated of my fears decided to join as I was overjoyed to find a site of like minded individuals, both male and female.  I see joining as a way to continue in this journey in a positive way by discussing experiences, ideas, fantasies etc.

For example after reading some of the experiences here I decided last night to pee on the bathroom floor.  Fairly minor thing but for me it was a first and I thoroughly enjoyed it.....guess it's time to keep some old towels handy! 😉

My fetish is fairly strong in that the aspect of pee play doesn't have to end with sex or an orgasm, or needs to be part of a sexual act. I simply enjoy it and can "get my kicks" or satisfaction from it alone.  

I realize that many are different in that the pee play is just "part" of the overall experience and that sex or orgasm completes it for them or perhaps sharing pics or videos.....different strokes for different folks.

With all of this being said I agree with your rant as I still find this to be  private/personal in that I don't mind discussing it with strangers but I sure as heck won't be sharing pictures or videos of my escapades any time soon.  No doubt there are some that will and for them that may be part of their fetish. If it is I'm sure it won't be long until they disclose it at which point I'm sure they won't mind sharing pics or vids with others that have the same interests, however to just assume that someone wants to do this right off the hop is just a tad intrusive.

Now it's time to go and find some old towels!

Cheers!

 

Edited August 27, 2020 by Gramps61
Spelling error

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

13 hours ago, Gramps61 said:

As a newbie here, less than a week or so, I agree.  I'm Male and kept my fetish hidden/secret for nearly 5 decades and only recently disclosed it to my wife who was/is very supportive and has participated in "some" aspects of it.....golden shower, no face, holding onto me while I peed.  That's the extent of it, and I have no doubt that if she wants to explore it any further she'll ask questions, but for the time being I am elated as I was very fearful she wouldn't have been accepting of it or worse.  Prior to this I never disclosed it to anyone, not even my ex spouse of 7 years.

The very reason I joined was because I stumbled across this site quite by accident and having been recently liberated of my fears decided to join as I was overjoyed to find a site of like minded individuals, both male and female.  I see joining as a way to continue in this journey in a positive way by discussing experiences, ideas, fantasies etc.

For example after reading some of the experiences here I decided last night to pee on the bathroom floor.  Fairly minor thing but for me it was a first and I thoroughly enjoyed it.....guess it's time to keep some old towels handy! 😉

My fetish is fairly strong in that the aspect of pee play doesn't have to end with sex or an orgasm, or needs to be part of a sexual act. I simply enjoy it and can "get my kicks" or satisfaction from it alone.  

I realize that many are different in that the pee play is just "part" of the overall experience and that sex or orgasm completes it for them or perhaps sharing pics or videos.....different strokes for different folks.

With all of this being said I agree with your rant as I still find this to be  private/personal in that I don't mind discussing it with strangers but I sure as heck won't be sharing pictures or videos of my escapades any time soon.  No doubt there are some that will and for them that may be part of their fetish. If it is I'm sure it won't be long until they disclose it at which point I'm sure they won't mind sharing pics or vids with others that have the same interests, however to just assume that someone wants to do this right off the hop is just a tad intrusive.

Now it's time to go and find some old towels!

Cheers!

 

And great to have you as part of the community.  You've touched on my point really - as well as such a breadth of aspects to our fetish, everyone has their own depth too. Everyone explores to the depth they're comfortable with.

When they share an account of something they've experienced it's often a big thing for them to share and it really irritates me to see a comment which may as well read "ok, but that's not good enough because you didn't do this..."

 

[oliver2 4,418]

5 hours ago, MasterDarcy said:

Your speech is sweet, but, I'm afraid, unless you are able to reconstruct DNA, you're going to have to live with the fact that the majority of males are schmucks.

Because in all of the whole human race, Mrs Lovett, 
There are two kinds of men and only two. 
There's the one who stays put in his proper place
And the one with his foot in the other one's face. 
Look at me, Mrs Lovett, look at you. 
 

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

It's an interesting view @MasterDarcy - and I'm not dismissing it by any means.  It does read however that because of our ancestry, our genetic traits or perhaps previous generations' practises, that men behaving like knuckle dragging troglodytes is to be expected and accepted that it represents the majority of men.

The same argument could be applied, because our ancestors had no sanitation and huge rates of infant mortality should we not seek to better ourselves?  Surely the thing that separates humankind from the animals is our ability to develop and better ourselves, to become civilised?   On a different level, if I'm driving down a road and someone steps in front of me, should I change my direction or speed?  Is it an acceptable defence when I run them over that lots of people get run over and I was just following the road?

I definitely believe that the majority of those men who post on this forum are decent, respectful individuals.  Sure there are exceptions, just like some ladies will be brasher and cruder than others.  It seems that often these exceptions are the transitory members who pop up, shoot profanities all over or just post crudely and are promptly banned or lose interest and leave. Unfortunately those are often the people who make the most noise, whilst the respectable reserved individuals carry on being quietly reserved and respectable in the background.

I do believe though that almost every aspect of nature, including people's attitudes and behaviours can be mapped as a range of 'values' - along the lines of a Gaussian distribution for those familiar with statistics. So from the troglodyte to the civilised gentlemen and lady there will be a range of styles of communication.  Somewhere lower down will be the "Woman...  man wants to shag",   somewhere higher up would be slightly gentler and more refined forms of communication.  Communication which considers the recipient, values and attempts to interest and nurture them.

All I'm suggesting is that we (and I give us all credit for being in the more intelligent side of the graph) have a little look at the profile and previous history of the person we're replying to and we use a bit of intelligence in what we write.   If someone is shyly telling of a guilty secret experience and has posted in their profile that they will never post pictures, then don't write something discouraging or asking for photos and more. Simple.

As I said, I'm not disagreeing because I believe we are on the same page. I just want our small pool of contributing lady members (as well as gentlemen too) to feel encouraged to continue to do so.

[Eliminature 5,209]

I've been here less than a week and already, I'm a little bit frightened myself. I'm more than happy to share my experiences, post waist down shots (no face!) and celebrate our fetish. Hopefully more - including fantasies and fiction. But to community members generally please, please don't ask me to do things like talk with you away from here and generally do things that would be unfaithful to my husband. I can't do that. I'm married and it would be very wrong. I'm flattered that you enjoy what I've posted so far. I didn't know that so many men liked women to pee standing up - I honestly thought that most men preferred us to pop a squat so that they could be manly and dominant. I'm very pleased to be proven wrong.

All the same, I am feeling a bit frightened suddenly confronted with the fantasies and demands of strangers. Not upset, not offended, not shocked, not disgusted: just a little bit scared.

[Sophie 24,410]

2 minutes ago, Eliminature said:

I've been here less than a week and already, I'm a little bit frightened myself. I'm more than happy to share my experiences, post waist down shots (no face!) and celebrate our fetish. Hopefully more - including fantasies and fiction. But to community members generally please, please don't ask me to do things like talk with you away from here and generally do things that would be unfaithful to my husband. I can't do that. I'm married and it would be very wrong. I'm flattered that you enjoy what I've posted so far. I didn't know that so many men liked women to pee standing up - I honestly thought that most men preferred us to pop a squat so that they could be manly and dominant. I'm very pleased to be proven wrong.

All the same, I am feeling a bit frightened suddenly confronted with the fantasies and demands of strangers. Not upset, not offended, not shocked, not disgusted: just a little bit scared.

If people are bothering you feel free to report them to a moderator (preferably using the report button) and we'll look into it.

[steve25805 126,015]

1 hour ago, Eliminature said:

I've been here less than a week and already, I'm a little bit frightened myself. I'm more than happy to share my experiences, post waist down shots (no face!) and celebrate our fetish. Hopefully more - including fantasies and fiction. But to community members generally please, please don't ask me to do things like talk with you away from here and generally do things that would be unfaithful to my husband. I can't do that. I'm married and it would be very wrong. I'm flattered that you enjoy what I've posted so far. I didn't know that so many men liked women to pee standing up - I honestly thought that most men preferred us to pop a squat so that they could be manly and dominant. I'm very pleased to be proven wrong.

All the same, I am feeling a bit frightened suddenly confronted with the fantasies and demands of strangers. Not upset, not offended, not shocked, not disgusted: just a little bit scared.

If anyone is making you feel uncomfortable, the mod team will take it very seriously. We don't like seeing our lady members scared away. By all means report anything untoward.

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

11 hours ago, Eliminature said:

All the same, I am feeling a bit frightened suddenly confronted with the fantasies and demands of strangers. Not upset, not offended, not shocked, not disgusted: just a little bit scared.

 

I think of this site very much like a pub...  one of those warm inviting ones.   When you walk in for the first time it takes a little while to find your bearings, but there's generally a few or maybe more than a few regulars and other drinkers in there already.  They're friendly and happy to include you in their conversations, or happy to let you just sit at the bar and enjoy your surroundings.

Around the sides are the room are tables and booths, sometimes people sitting there quietly having a drink.

Now - fine, you may like the look of a person sitting having a quiet drink - but is it right to go and sit there chatting to them one-to-one almost uninvited?   Even if the conversation seems to flow well, would you really turn it straight to asking for sexual favours?  Harassing them to chat, repeatedly dominating the conversation?

The bar staff of the pub would be more than happy to throw out any troublesome drunks who are spoiling the enjoyment of the place for others. There is a code of behaviour and just the same this site has published rules.  If you can't remember how Rule #3 or Rule #15 apply then it's time to revisit the site rules.

 

(For those people who come online and just bluntly ask 'any girls here'  - this is a friendly place full of all sorts of people, male and female, married, in relationships etc.  You've confused the pub for a brothel where the bar is lined up with girls pretending to be interested in you because they're paid to be.)   

 

[beergut64 170]

Unfortunately all the decent chaps on the site will already have known and respected this.

The non decent chaps (aka assholes) will completely ignore this, or at best not get past the first line.

On the upside at least the rant will have provided a cathartic experience🙂

[PissOnMyParade 447]

I feel uncomfortable reading this post. Admins, can you deal with this please... 😛

I'm kidding of course, I don't really feel uncomfortable. I'd only feel uncomfortable if I felt like I identified with leaving the types of comments explained here but still, I feel like there will inevitably be some idiots who can't control themselves on sites like this and it's impossible to police every single immature post...

If you see such a comment, that's what the report button is for.

[Sweets 4,517]

One think I noticed that when a lady introduces herself she gets bombarded with comment.  But I notice that the guys don’t get the same treatment some don’t even get a welcome.   I understand everyone being excited about having a new female.  But we should try to make a point to welcome everyone.  I try to see new ones that have no comments and or a few and say hi.  

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

Just a bump back up to the top of something I originally posted earlier in the year.   Have a read up to the first post and you'll see what it is...

Why am I bumping it back up - well it seems there's a few people who could do well to have a look at themselves.

In the last week a relatively new member has told me how she has blocked two different guys for the same pattern of behaviour - posting the same repetitive question, after question, after question, after question.  Apart from anything else it's draining to have to wade through that - and all because someone seems to like the same niche that you go delirious over.  One of those guys has had a run in with a different member since after asking about the same narrow subject.

I'm not going to name names - but do know exactly who it is breaking the rules.   Yes there is a rule, it works to protect everyone in the community...

Quote

3. Do not harass, insult, intimidate, or threaten anyone. This includes begging for content, exposing a member's personal information, or sending unsolicited sexual images.

The next step is a formal warning when a member reports you to the staff - and then a ban is one further small step away.

Think...

[steve25805 126,015]

Members - usually male - bombarding other members - usually female - with constant requests or the same repetitive questions, are a drain on the lifeblood of forums such as this. We have a low tolerance for such behaviour. 

Anyone being troubled by such behaviour please do report it because we are on your side. We will ban if necessary.

So I fully back everything @gldenwetgoose has already said.

You will all find that all the mods and Admin are on the same page on this one.

So if you are getting harassed by anyone, do let us know about it.

[steve25805 126,015]

On 9/22/2020 at 11:06 PM, pizzapeople said:

This isn't a comment specific to this site, but applicable to virtually every kink or sex-related site i've ever seen: The reactive approach is not good enough. It should not be incumbent upon the women who join to have to wade through so much abuse, it is clearly an unsexy turnoff at best and a vicious cycle of more and more gender imbalance and male desperation (the bad kind) at worst. I don't have an answer, but 'just report em' is not a good enough answer any more. Something has to give.

One answer, and I'm dead serious about this, is for there to be more avenues to online sex work like only fans and cam girls. But that alone is not enough.

The problem is that whilst forums like this are free, the online sex work stuff is never going to be. So you are always going to get those wanting to get their jollies on the cheap in places like this.

And whilst having to report stuff is maybe less than ideal, we mods cannot be everywhere and see everything 24/7. And we have no access to private messages unless their recipients choose to share them with us. If we see bad behaviour we will act on it even in the absence of a report, but for all that we don't see we are never going to know about it unless it is reported to us. So reporting bad behaviour as well as blocking the miscreants - after all they are likely in most cases to do the same to others - is vital for keeping a lid on the obnoxiousness.

We very much value our friendly vibe here and will do whatever we have to to maintain and protect it.

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

... and just to touch on a very small point - why would guys actually want to private message?  What is it that can’t be posted on the forum?

Maybe it’s a misunderstanding because other forums are all message based? Understandable, but move with the environment. Trust, safety and community are our ethos. 

I can’t think of too many legitimate and safe reasons - especially when you’re asking a lady to chat in private. Do you imagine if you saw them in a pub and said hello they’d jump straight in your car? 

I’m more than happy to be educated on this gap in my understanding of course. 

[Kupar 13,339]

3 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

... and just to touch on a very small point - why would guys actually want to private message?  What is it that can’t be posted on the forum?

Maybe it’s a misunderstanding because other forums are all message based? Understandable, but move with the environment. Trust, safety and community are our ethos. 

I can’t think of too many legitimate and safe reasons - especially when you’re asking a lady to chat in private. Do you imagine if you saw them in a pub and said hello they’d jump straight in your car? 

I’m more than happy to be educated on this gap in my understanding of course. 

Good points. one question though, about the etiquette of following on this site. Follow without asking? Ask (in PM or if not allowed, then as a post on a profile)?

[gldenwetgoose 21,486]

14 minutes ago, Kupar said:

Good points. one question though, about the etiquette of following on this site. Follow without asking? Ask (in PM or if not allowed, then as a post on a profile)?

Following a member basically just means that you get notifications when they post content etc. It’s maybe different to other sites / social media where following is more limited to friend requests with people you specifically know.

So there’s no real etiquette that says you should ask to do so. (In your profile you can choose whether others can follow you or not)  

Similarly I’ve got no issue with people messaging for such reasons - it’s really just where people feel they ‘have to’ DM in private. 

[Eliminature 5,209]

Thank you, as always, for having our backs. 

[Sophie 24,410]

21 minutes ago, dodges said:

Who cares?  I'm not here to be a nice guy.  I'm here to get girls to piss on me and bang me.  Nice guys finish fucking last.  Also it's practicing not practising and while not whilst in the US.

Keep up with that attitude and you won't be a member of this site for long, I promise.