Goodbye

[spywareonya 37,962]

On ‎01‎/‎03‎/‎2018 at 12:56 AM, Admin said:

 If you are only coming back if there is sufficient demand and likes then I would say that's for the wrong reasons

Terrificly delicate matter.

When you live the way I live, becoming so sensitive that even breathing is painful, everything become both glorious and terrible at he same time. Since a Witch means how self-exposing commitment is, If she commits to something than she really commits to it. And in my worldview, commitment must be glorified. Not me, careful, my commitment. That's why I Always said I respect people like you or zzyzx or Ozabot or Funnywatcher etc. Beside one of them who actually became my friend and I can tell you is a marvellous person, I know nothing of them! But there is something I know about them. The sweat they drip for the forum. To me, anything worthy of being done, is worthy of being overdone. To show my appreciation to the enormous, statuary glory of somebody like zzyzx I could create a video where I chant her nickname like a mantra to a goddess, I'm extreme to those pitches when aroused. Now you start to understand me a bit more?

 

Frenzy

 

much more than EGO

 

And by the way, that thing about commitment to the forum was sincere. If I was ever to get a raise or different working schedule, I was gonna propose myself to partecipate in fundraising sometimes you admins asked about and even propose myself as a Moderator or what I know. I love this place and when I love something I feel an enormous sourge of commitment to that place. And in my opinion it must be glorified in a frenzy way.

 

Intense, never ending and heart-touching. Why these words exactly? Because it is EXACTLY how I feel like whenever I post on this forum. Frenzied like the first days when you fall in love with somebody, or when you reflect the marvels of a ten years relationship.

 

Filled to the point I cry and laugh and must finger myself

 

Thats' what I feel for you. And I came upon the immature conclusion that the only way you could give back something similar was by liking me a lot.

 

I'm gowing up and changing my mind.

Meanwhile, consider what I whispered through this all-sincere and utterly intimate post

[F.W 5,734]

I dont understand your problem Spyware.There is no obligation to be a member,but we dd enjoy your posts.Please come back you were great.

[spywareonya 37,962]

Oh Fanny (I even mispelled yor name in my previous post, forgive me!)

The thing is quite clear:

I don't beg for attentions, but can't stand something as intimate as my contributions (or other's ones I like/replies vehemently) to go unnoticed!

Things deserve a pre-set amount of respect basing on how much intimate (and long/well written when it comes to forum posts!) they are, people's freewill and personal tastes (holy and gift of Nature, nonetheless) should not be used to dabble with this Truth!

 

That is the point! A place (a bar, a friend Group, an internet forum etc) is as worthy as it show to be able to understand this truth and act along its guiding lines:

good things should not go unnoticed

 

The better the thing, the Greater the cheering it mandatorily must receive by anybody who wants to be marked as "interested in doing the right thing"

The world is going to hell and all of us had been treated as freaks because people do not commit themselves to follow a behavioural code which grants people to mandatorily obtain what they deserve accordingly to how much they previously commited themselves to sticking to that code

 

 

I don't want to erase freethinking, just to avoid people abuse truth by preferring what they immediately feel to what is holy. Like the last time somebody reeked of judging-attitude that bad that you felt that you would have been rejected if you dared to tell this person that you are a piss-fetishist.

 

The world make sense only if you force it to make sense

 

What we all want? To be treated the way  we feel like we deserve. The Cosmical Good wants exactly this for us all. But to make such a world than we must first stick first person to such a code, judging people not about their tastes and even less according to our own, but only about how much commited they are in their life (no matter about what), how much did they mastered their unconscious becoming mature people, and how much do they stick to the Code. That is the way a Witch live, and her only goal in life, beside forcing herself to Always scarier-than-the-former exploration of personal deep unconscious (where all traumas and fears are repressed) is to show people what a glorious world this could be if we stop treating people according to what we feel like, and started not pathetically following a set of rules, but follow guidelines who Always tell ONLY one thing: "Are you showing this (regardless of what "this" is time by time) the proper appreciation?". That is all!

 

For a certain time I felt that I was obtained such appreciation. I don't need it but it would be disrepectful not to show it because that would mean that something good goes unnoticed!!

 

And this doesn't refer to me only AT ALL!!! It is something we must learn to show EVERYBODY ELSE. That would make us much better persons.

 

 

I live to advise people about what we could get by living that way.

 

 

 

Nervous and axious utilization of what I wrote are NOT what I am up. Just to reflect about it from a conceptual point of view.

NOW I said everything. I'll be back if people like to have around somebody who live to this end. If elsewhere I would be perceived as rude and morally-bashing my return wouldn't be fitting!

[spywareonya 37,962]

I don't want forced and nervous appreciation

 

I only felt something was going a bit under

 

Now I confided all of this to you all I'm ready to be back, if you still want me back

 

regardless, love you all, and thanks

[Brutus 2,206]

The forum is messed up with refreshing the posts on my end at the moment, so this message was a response to an older post. I erased it because it seemed awkward! Ignore.

 

Edited March 3, 2018 by Brutus

[ndr1968pz 149]

Glad you've decided to stay!  Looking forward to reading your posts again.  I apologize in advance for not voting (one way or another) very often.  The "button" just seems a bit political to me and I have always had an aversion for politics.  So, understand that when I do use it, it means that I have been very highly motivated indeed! 

[F.W 5,734]

15 hours ago, spywareonya said:

I don't want forced and nervous appreciation

 

I only felt something was going a bit under

 

Now I confided all of this to you all I'm ready to be back, if you still want me back

 

regardless, love you all, and thanks

We want you back Spyware!Its sad when any friend leaves.

[spywareonya 37,962]

10 hours ago, Brutus said:

The forum is messed up with refreshing the posts on my end at the moment, so this message was a response to an older post. I erased it because it seemed awkward! Ignore.

 

You enacted the greatest crisis of my life, unless it was for you and Fanny I wold have never discovered that deep in my unconscious, I was mistaking spontaneity with moral lazyness

 

I have to grow and become less anxious

 

Love you all, sincerely

 

see you soon, as soon as I will have become a better person

[Scot_Lover 1,878]

Please come back, as fannywatcher has said, it's sad when friends leave, for whatever reason. My ladies felt an empathy with you, Maigh told me you were going to leave, she knew before it before this thread, and I had no idea. Come back to the people who care about you, come back to your friends.

[Brutus 2,206]

On 3/3/2018 at 5:20 AM, spywareonya said:

You enacted the greatest crisis of my life, unless it was for you and Fanny I wold have never discovered that deep in my unconscious, I was mistaking spontaneity with moral lazyness

 

I have to grow and become less anxious

 

Love you all, sincerely

 

see you soon, as soon as I will have become a better person

Well I had no intentions of enacting a crisis in you. I just said what I personally felt needed to be said to bring some perspective. Regardless, hopefully we've all grown a little.

[spywareonya 37,962]

I don't feel any need to post in this topic again but I thought it was fitting that the last poster would have been me.

I want to thanks all those who showed me their love, pushing me to reveal what was the real reason of me leaving, i.e. that I didn't feel appreciated enough. And subsequently, I want to thanks all that criticized me, making truth surfacing through the emotional distress they enacted in me, a truth that warned me that I was too insecure, and that insecure people doesn't push other people's unconscious to partecipate. Now everything is going great. I'll continue to grow, and to share on this marvellous place.

Thank you all.

If anybody has questions or doubts, write in one of my active thread, or PM me, let's make this life-changing but up-to-day spent topic rest in peace.