I'm sorry but I don't share my stories with people.

[Blackinksoul30 1,246]

I've seen some comments in the  public chat, saying that people want to read my story. 

I do apologize but there's kind of a long story as to why I no longer share stories with anyone. Not even close friends.

7 years ago i did have my stories online that I'd share the link with close friends. I actually had some good friends that loved my writing. They begged me to write more. They couldn't stop reading my writing. That lasted a few months. Then eventually they disappeared. I never heard from them again. They no longer asked about my stories nor to see any more of my work. I haven't heard from any of them since. At the same time I was sharing the link with some other writers that had been published and they told me, 'You need to fix this' 'change this' etc. Which always made me feel uncomfortable because i write only for myself, to make myself smile. I don't write for others. It at the time was just for me and my friends. But since people asked to read it i'd send it to them.

Not wanting to have my coping mechanism 'bashed' and 'ripped to shreds' i took all my stories down off the internet. And began my journey into 'Send it!' 'I promise i'll read it' 'you can't not send it!' 'how selfish of you not to send it' 'oh you write romance well you gotta send it' 'send it to me now. i have all weekend free to read it' 'i promise i'll read it as soon as i get home' Each of these people that i sent my story to they either confessed months later that they didn't read it nor do they have any plans to read it or they just deleted me as a friend, cut off all communicate after I sent it. Mostly men did this to me. 

So i got to the point where i got extremely protective of my writing. It got to the point where my writing became such a cathartic release that i became too embarrised and ashamed to share it with just strangers. I no longer trusted people... and this unforutantely carried on for the next 6 years... i'd give in and send it to someone and they wouldn't read it. i'd send it to 'best friends' and they'd read a few pages...but that was it... people that i thought would read the whole thing.  or some wouldn't even read it at all even though they said they would... even though they knew how hurt i was about past friends not reading it...they tried to assure me they'd read it..but they wouldn't... 

Being let down over and over.... from getting bashed from published writers and those that just loved writing... to people that pretty much demanded that i send it.. no matter how personal i tried to explain that it was... they quickly destroyed my trust. and made me whole heartedly regret sending it in the first place. It's something..rather stomach churning... i don't mean to be sexist..but.. to confess to men that i write romance..and then they demand i send it... and i send it..and then they no longer communicate with me..it makes me feel used... and like trash..its like... well i hope you enjoy this 'Smut' i sent.... guess i'm done here.... okay i'll just see myself out.... i guess you're not gonna tell me if you like it...

When i sent it to people... i wasn't really looking for critiques though over the years some would offer me a critique... an extremely critical critique... but i write to self sooth and comfort myself from depression and chronic illness. writing is my escape. it stops the sadness and pain. it's incredibly extremely personal and catered to myself.... it's my heart....and people trampled on it and abused my trust way too much over the last 7...to even 8 or 9 years... 

My writing is for myself now... myself alone... Please i hope people respect my decision. As much as anyone here would try to convince me that they would read it... i've been 'promised with all of peoples heart' that they'd read it..it's been lies for years. 

[speedy3471 10,655]

I totally respect your decision, iam sure everyone here does. What's important is its therapeutic for you. We all have coping mechanisms and do diffrent things to help deal with stress. Yours is writing, I hope you never stop writing 

[steve25805 126,023]

@Blackinksoul30, obviously your writing is a great help to you personally in a very cathartic way, but your experiences of sharing with others has not been.

I understand. I hope we all understand. If you don't wish to share but write only for you and if that helps you, then great.

In my younger days - way before the internet - I used to write pee stories using old fashioned pen and paper. Dinosaurs still roamed the earth in those days, lol. Such stories were only ever written for my pleasure. I never had the slightest intention of sharing them with anyone at the time and never did. Writing just for yourself is a concept I understand.

[Guest UnabashedUser]

3 hours ago, owlman76 said:

I totally see where you're coming from, I used to write stuff on a large well known site, I gave up due to criticisms of my writing style, I remember writing an excellent piece, yet I still had people commenting things like ' there should be a comma there' , or ' that sentence is too long' , or 'that's not grammatically correct' .

Well so bleeding what, most people don't SPEAK correctly, look at PROPER, English, technically words like 'don't ' , or 'shouldn't '  do not actually exist! yet we use these words every day, so therefore NONE of us really speak correctly, so how can ANYONE, criticise, someone else,s writing or speaking style.

I'm a technical writer by trade and I agree with you on this point. The grammar Nazi's that are picking on punctuation, etc. are missing the big point of any communication that's going on in the piece they're criticizing. Usually such nit-pickers tend to be inflated egotists who can't write their way out of a wet brown paper bag and whose only enjoyment in life is bitching and fault finding in others.  To wit: assholes. 

Keep writing, bro.

Don't let the assholes get you down. 

[Peefreak99 3,722]

Ofc i respect your decision but let me just tell you one thing here you never have to worry about getting your writing ripped to shreds we are a tight community kinda like a litle online family haha and if anyone would insult you or your writing that punk would get thrown the fuck out of here faster then a bullet and @spywareonya would problaby curse him/her but anyway good luck with your writing