This is hard for me to write because I know people will read this and get frustrated with me like so many members have with me in the past.
Let me start off by saying the Admins here are wonderful. Any problem I’ve had they’ve been quick to reply and help with any issue I’ve had. They are incredibly kind. The admins are really doing everything the can to make this the best site for pee interests.
That being said though after being on peefans since last May I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to take a break from peefans. I think peefans is great if you’re posting photos/videos and/or looking for advice about certain niched pee related interests. But if someone is not really currently actively participating in watersports then there’s not much that one can contribute here other than bringing up the same things that they ‘used’ to do or ‘wished’ they could do.
I joined peefans after I left peesearch because I discovered that that website was a ghost town and no one was really communicating privately on there anymore. People really weren’t using their chat. I came here and was really looking forward to getting to know people and making friends. The chat here I think is wonderful if you’re on at the right time. Maybe it’s my time zone I’m in but the majority of times I’m in the chat room there’s maybe one or two people really using it and I scroll up and see a big conversation that had happened prior to me being on. People only seem to be on the chat for a few moments and then they leave. Which I admit I do the same thing. Other times I’ve posted in the chat, I don’t get a response until hours later after that person that responded is no longer here. Really getting to know people in the chat is rather difficult, since me and others are only on short amounts of time. It looks like the majority of people on this site are here to share their experiences and they have plans for more experiences. Which is fine, that is the purpose of this site. But to get to know people through private message, generally seems frowned upon here and really searching for friendship through this site I get the sense that that will be annoying and come across as spam and really not allowed here.
But I’m kind of in a different situation. I don’t think people here are really looking for close friendships. I get a sense that people aren’t on here to really get to know one another. I think if my situation was different, If I didn’t want friendship and If I actively regularly could participate in watersports, maybe then I’d feel like I had more to contribute. But my lack of sex/intimate life and lack of watersports activities makes me feel like I don’t really belong here. I have expressed my desire to find friends and make social connections here but generally when I express that, I get a very general response from people that they’re not really on this site for that purpose and that I shouldn’t be either. I don’t want to go to a pee dating site, I’m not looking for a ‘boyfriend’. This was a safe place for me. I get a sense that some here are generally frustrated with me when I post. I apologize that I frustrated people here due to the fact that I’m looking for friends. I’m sorry if I seem stubborn or easily discouraged or regularly sad. I’m actually not regularly sad. It’s just when I come here, I feel like I hit roadblocks as I try to seek what I’m looking for.
I also feel like since I’ve joined peefans when I have posted things I’ve done or things I’m into related to pee, the majority of those things were either frowned upon or I received negative feedback. (sounding, catheter interest, wetting a bed, peeing on a pad or in a diaper, peeing into cups, bladder holding). The majority of times I posted about these interests, some members were quick to try to discourage me to not do these interests due to safety issues and the feedback was generally negative. Even some of the ‘peeing into cups’ posts I made got negative feedback. Which as time passed, I became more and more regretful after each ‘interest’ post I’d make or question I’d make about these interests. I know kink shamming is not allowed here but I really do feel like the site really has an underlying problem with kink shamming still. When someone feels brave enough to express a sexual desire, the last thing they’d want to encounter is a scare tactic or encouragement not to have an interest in it. The website seems more and more niched into peeing into toilets or panty wetting which is great don’t get me wrong but anything other than that, is seen as out of the ordinary or wrong.