hentaixt

Let's see:
Laundry? DONE!
Dishes? DONE!
Carpets? DONE!
Garage? DONE!
Backyard? DONE!

I guess all I have left is the bathrooms.... but who wants to pee there anyway??

The wealthy really do live in a different world from us. I’ve been working at furniture store for a summer job, not even been there a month, but I've to tell you about this client. Strap in, it might be long.

I was chatting with a co-worker on a slow day when this well dressed woman comes in and starts meandering around. I mean she would just look at something, wrinkle her nose, and dash away. She went through the sofa section THREE TIMES, like she was going to find something new. Finally she comes over to us and her eyes light up. "What is this chair?"

"It's one of newer models. Would you like some information on it?"
"Yes, very much. I have some questions as well, how absorbent is it?"
"Ho~What?"
"What amount of liquid can it hold?"

"It-It's a chair... they're not rated for that. In fact most of them have 'Cloth-Cloak' so spills just roll off without absorbing."

"Well that's just terrible! Do you have a version without that??"
"There's a whole catalog of styles and colors."

"I need something quickly. Will it take long to order or do you have each variety in the back?"
"I mean we might?"
"Could I test this one?"
"Yes, you can sit in it. Whoa!! What are you doing with your skirt?"
"I want to pee here."
"Uh, NO."
"Look I'll be honest. I have a very large house; my library is VERY far from the nearest bathroom. I am looking to buy a chair to use for convenience."
"Well, IF you purchase a chair you can do whatever you want with it. But there's NO WAY, we can let you do that on a floor model."

"Alright, I'll go and use the ladies room. While I'm gone find me what I requested."
"I'll do my best." Here she wanders off; we watched to make sure she actually made TO the bathroom. She was gone for longer than expected, so she must have really had to go. I get the feeling she had been waiting to visit here until she was desperate. That also might explain the erratic nature of her in the store. Once she returned, I showed the styles that I'd found and we did in fact have one in the back ready to go. She paid, I got commission off it and she spoke to my manager. I was worried, thinking she was going to complain about my service..... since I didn't let her pee on the chair. Quite the opposite, she commended me and told the manager I was to accompany the delivery team when they took the chair our tomorrow, else she would leave a bad review of the store online. This is getting longer than I thought already, so you'll have to wait for next time to find out about what happened. Well, that's if you tell me you actually want to know.  :WINK:

Actually the police 1 above gave me a good idea too.

"Miss, you know it is illegal to relieve yourself on the street?"
"Yes I was aware, that is why I am using this basement floor window."
"I can see that. However you should be using the trees on the sidewalk where it is designated."

"Oh sorry, there was no space when I arrived."

So can I just say, like Uber cars are the best. Seriously, where else can you take a piss on the way to somewhere and not have to do ANY cleanup? It's super easy to do too, you just wander around drinking until you get the urge, pull 1 up and wait for them to arrive. Sit in the back behind the driver (smaller cars are better), calmly enjoy your nice ride, and like 2 min before you're dropped off, hose down the back of the seat. You have to be super careful and know how much you need to go though. I've had to cut and run 'cause I almost got caught before. I swear it couldn't be easier for a girl to do! You all need to do it too, super fun. I pee EVERY. TIME. and I've even done it with the same drivers before. In fact, I think I'm going to call 1 right now. I don't even have anywhere I need to be, but I sure as hell need to "GO"!

"Waitress!"
"Yes, Miss?"
"What is in this glass?"

"You ordered half lemonade and half tea with low ice?"
"No I said half lemonade and half PEE! Lift you skirt and fix it right here and now or I guarantee you no tip."
"Terribly sorry, let me just remove the lid and... Haa~ there... you... go."

"Welcome to the Drive-Thru! May I take your order?"
"Hold on a sec. I was j~" *CRACKLE* *static* *garbled incoherent words* *splashing* *HISSSSSSSS* "So can I get your largest soda to go?"

"I'm sorry Ma'am can you repeat that, the intercom cut out badly."
"Oh sure. I said, I was just looking for somewhere to pee, but now I'm kinda thirsty. So can I get your largest soda to go?"
"One Extra Large Soda Jumbo sized. That will be $4.75. Please pull round."
"Here you go."
"Your soda Ma'am; may I offer you a wipe?"

(4th Wall Break... I'm diverging from the standard format with this 1, pretty sure not a prob. after you read it.)

[Screen flickers and a loud] *POP* [Suddenly silence and the channel test pattern]

{Announcer voice}: Uh, Test? TEST? What, OH Sh- Tales of-from Wet Carpet Magazine: LIVE! Has been postponed due to technical issues caused by over-spray. (Under her breath: You all were watching..... you saw what happened...)

In its place we offer a new show for approval, remember to write to the station if you like what you see. As always address will be on-screen after the credits. We now present: Chick-Pee's Cooking.

[Screen goes black and fades into the new show. The title "Chick-Pee's Cooking is seen and some short intro music plays. When the title card leaves there is a TV kitchen with a single female behind the counter. She appears not very tall, her blonde hair in high short pig tails, she is very much nude aside from a frilly waist apron. Her Huge Perfect Teardrop breasts seem to be almost resting on the counter.]

Welcome to Chick-Pee's Cooking!! For my special 1st episode, I am going to show you how to cook a local favorite and an original recipe! Wok Fried Basmati Yellow Curry Rice Peelaf!  [She shakes back and forth making her extreme large breast bounce. As her jiggling subsides, she grabs a breast in each hand and lifts them all the way to her chin.] As always, my cooking is Au Naturel, no hormones, chemicals, or bad players allowed. [She drops her breasts and they land with enough force to almost topple ingredients set out on the counter]. So here we go, we have:

Basmati Rice

Two Eggs

Your Veggies: Carrots, Onions, Green Onions, Red Peppers, and Pee-Peas (more on those in a minute) *WINK*

Garlic

Turmeric

Curry

Black Pepper

Soy Sauce

Chicken Broth (NON-GMO Free Range just like the eggs) *ANOTHER WINK*

and Butter [As the camera pans past the ingredients there is no time when her breasts are not the background and the camera pans from one side to the other of her bountiful cups.]

So, Let's get started. You want to put the rice in a pot with the curry, turmeric, half the garlic, 3/4 of your chicken stock and the secret ingredient; one full bladder of pee... or as I like to call it "LOVE." [Here she steps up on to a small stair and lifts her frilly apron showing off a blonde pubic bush in the shape of a heart. Without hesitation, she begins peeing a bright yellow gush, full force into the pot with all the other ingredients. Her stream wanes and she pushes out a few final drips.] Okay, get a lid on this and then just forget it for a bit. We will need to stir once just to make sure everything is mixed well, but that is much later. Next we start the pee-peas. *giggle* So our dried organic peas are ready to go in a pan of their own. Here you are going to add the rest of your chicken stock, the soy sauce, and another half a bladder of pee. [She once again steps up and begins urinating at high speed into the second pot, cutting her stream off after about fifteen seconds.]

{Internal Voice}: How does she have that much piss left? I just saw her empty herself less than five minutes ago... Movie magic, massive bladder... actually WHO CARE!!

Whoa, always a bit hard to cut it off that fast. *giggles again* [Breasts shake excessively as she pats her heart bush] Don't worry; the rest will come out soon. So get these on the heat to boil. While that is all going we need to get the vagetables... VEGetables, in the wok to sauté with the butter to get a nice GOLDEN color in the onions and throw the peppers and the rest of the garlic in to mix up the flavors. Trust me it'll be worth it.

It is going to frantic for a minute while we keep an eye on everything. Stir your rice and give it a nice whiff for that aroma, mmmhhh, you should be here. Look at that nice rich yellow tone, not sure the camera can really do it justice. The curry, turmeric, and piss really absorb and mix with the fragrance of the basmati; it's making me water everywhere. [She stuffs a hand under her apron and then brings it to her mouth to the lick the coated fingers.] Alright, now comes the fun part, strain your pee-peas, and toss those into the wok with those warm, supple vag- VEGetables. Now before we toss all this steamy rice in we need to scramble our eggs. [Here she actually crushes the eggs between her cleavage and lets it drop into the wok.] Be careful to avoid the shells. [She spoons all the broken bits from the inside of her deep valley and she does have two mostly intact shells.] Beat those eggs to a scrambled mess. [Her boobs are quaking with the furious motions.] Alright, get that beautiful rice in the wok... NOW! Get everything stirred up, you want to keep all in motion, don't let it stop for at least two minutes. Add a bit more butter, it will help all the flavors come out and you can get the black pepper in too, warming it will bring out more of the spice. By the time you got that in, get it all moving again. [Now she is throwing the rice up and over catching it in the wok perfectly while her breast rise and drop with each motion.] We are in the home stretch here; if things look a bit dry, add more pee but not too much. You want some of the rice to get crunchy and pick up the seasoning from the wok itself. I am going to put in just a squirt. [She places a heel on the counter and stands on the toes of her other foot while shifting her hips and spraying down the rice mix.] My favorite part! [Steam immediately erupts from the wok and wafts into her breasts, it is mostly trapped beneath but some does reach her nose, she inhales deeply.] AMAZING! I can't wait to taste this!! Off the heat we go... and onto the plate.

So here it is. Doesn't that look gorgeous? The smell is indescribable, so many different aromas melded together perfectly. So let's garnish with our green onions, I know y'all thought I forgot them. *WINK AGAIN* Presentation is key.  Let's get a spoon and dig into this. [Hand under her apron again this time returns with a very slick covered spoon. She shoves it deeply into the pile, then after a few light blows at the steam, right into her mouth.] Once you make this, you too will know why it is such a crowd pleaser.

That's it for my Big Premiere Episode! Let the studio have all the love and maybe I'll be back again, FULL TIME. Until then... [She lifts her apron and holds a glass under her slit, it rapidly fills and overflows onto the floor and a large puddle forms around her feet, after more than a minute the flow ends abruptly. She lifts the glass and downs all of it in a single go.] AHHH~~ stay refreshed!

[Camera begins to pan out as she waves good-bye; she lifts one of her massive breasts and milks it into the glass, quickly filling half of it. As the credits start to play you hear her say:] Just a preview for next time, Breast Milk Cheesecake. [She lifts the glass to drink.]

[Screen goes black and the announcer is heard again with the address card for the studio.] As the lovely lady said, send your love notes here to the studio to see her back on the air again. I know I will!

Good thing this theater is always empty in the middle of the day, I can pull my skirt up my legs and pee anywhere.

OH NO! Is that the usher?

There is no way I can stop right now, I am going to get busted...

What are the odds? She stopped next to me, shrugged, and started to unbuckle her pants too.

"Hey Cidney?"

"Yes, Lainey?"

"Do you remember the last time we went out to eat and I DIDN'T pee under the table?"
"No, not really... but with your stream hitting my shin this isn't it either."

"Well, what's your excuse? My pumps are getting flooded with your piss too right now..."

I love going shopping with my Mom and Aunt.

They let me try on all the pretty clothes at the expensive stores.

Then when we read the price tags... we all go to the changing room together and soak the over-priced trash with our shared piss!