When was the last time you had sex?

[JDG 822]

About 4,5 months ago I think. My girlfriend and I had a daughter 4 months ago. First few weeks you really have to get used to your new life, waking up in the night etc so sex was the last thing on our minds. 

The baby is doing very well, she's sleeping through the nights for a long time already so we've found a nice rhythm I'd say. But my girlfriend has said to me a couple of times "I don't know what it is, I completely lost my sexual appetite since the delivery.. ".

We did it 3-4 times a week before, so last weeks it's really getting a little bit frustrating for me, I am getting hornier by the day. Taking care of myself is ok but being intimate with the girl I love is ofcourse much, much, much more statisfying. I'm just very hesitant to talk to her about my frustrations, I don't wanna be "that guy" that comes across as thinking only with his dick.

[Adidas105 129]

11 years ago. Used to miss it but not now. 

[gryffindork 9]

roughly 14 months ago. I'm 29 yr old male

[Kupar 13,163]

7 hours ago, JDG said:

About 4,5 months ago I think. My girlfriend and I had a daughter 4 months ago. First few weeks you really have to get used to your new life, waking up in the night etc so sex was the last thing on our minds. 

The baby is doing very well, she's sleeping through the nights for a long time already so we've found a nice rhythm I'd say. But my girlfriend has said to me a couple of times "I don't know what it is, I completely lost my sexual appetite since the delivery.. ".

We did it 3-4 times a week before, so last weeks it's really getting a little bit frustrating for me, I am getting hornier by the day. Taking care of myself is ok but being intimate with the girl I love is ofcourse much, much, much more statisfying. I'm just very hesitant to talk to her about my frustrations, I don't wanna be "that guy" that comes across as thinking only with his dick.

Congratulations to you both! Have fun watching the little person grow up ❤️.

I completely understand your reticence about mentioning your frustration but I think it's legitimate to talk to her about her loss of desire. You know her best, but these are new times for you both. I'd hope she'd understand, just as you understand that all sorts of things change when a baby comes.

K (my wife) lost her libido for a few months after the birth of our first child, and reckoned it might have been related to breastfeeding. I don't know if there is any evidence supporting this! Her desire did return though, especially after a stitch scar was dealt with so sex wasn't painful.

If you would find it difficult to talk to your gf about it but it is affecting you and risks damaging your relationship then perhaps talk to a counsellor or doctor. Sex is important, and mismatches can do damage if they last a long time.

Good luck with everything.

❤️

[JDG 822]

6 hours ago, Kupar said:

Congratulations to you both! Have fun watching the little person grow up ❤️.

I completely understand your reticence about mentioning your frustration but I think it's legitimate to talk to her about her loss of desire. You know her best, but these are new times for you both. I'd hope she'd understand, just as you understand that all sorts of things change when a baby comes.

K (my wife) lost her libido for a few months after the birth of our first child, and reckoned it might have been related to breastfeeding. I don't know if there is any evidence supporting this! Her desire did return though, especially after a stitch scar was dealt with so sex wasn't painful.

If you would find it difficult to talk to your gf about it but it is affecting you and risks damaging your relationship then perhaps talk to a counsellor or doctor. Sex is important, and mismatches can do damage if they last a long time.

Good luck with everything.

❤️

Thanks! We are really loving it all! 

I am not yet at the point that I need any counseling, she has also "helped" me with taking care of myself a couple of times as she understands that I still do have feelings. But it just isn't fun when you know she isn't really up for it. 

But as you say, I understand her too! She's also breastfeeding and her period also hasn't returned yet, so I'm guessing her hormones still aren't what they should be. We're both sure her libido will return! 

So yes, we have talked about very generally, where I just said "I still have those feelings from time to time" but not straight up "I'm starting to miss it and getting a bit frustrated sometimes". 

Luckily we still often have a cuddle and also still kiss often so it's definately not a case of falling out of love our something similar!