Peeing whilst on the phone

[Adyguy6970 813]

On Sunday evening I had a long phone call with a friend.  I'd been drinking quite a lot of water to counter the symptoms of a urine infection and half way through the call I got up, went upstairs, dropped my trousers and peed on the toilet.  Actually I spent most of the rest of the conversation sitting there.  I don't think she heard me pee because I peed against the porcelain rather than straight into the water.  It's not the first time I've done that sort of thing and maybe won't be the last.  It saved cutting the conversation short.  

[gldenwetgoose 20,252]

I've done the sit down and aim against the porcelain once or twice in the past too.  The last pee on the phone I remember though was during last year's lockdown.

It was at that point where the country had been at a complete standstill for a few weeks, and I'd been 'working from home'. Inverted commas because I didn't have any company issued IT and so no ability to work on my secure projects.  Instead lots of browsing time, jobs around the house and time on my cycle turbo trainer in the garage.  It was one afternoon I'd been cycling in the garage for about an hour, well hydrated and warm when my mobile rang - my local head of department.

Of course I stopped cycling to talk to him, and as soon as I did, the urge to pee hit.  What I do find is that cycling pretty much suppresses any need to pee - or at least moves the pressure point. As soon as I stopped, then the need was back instantly.  And it turned out the phonecall was a telephone 'induction' into safe Covid working practises for going into the office to collect a laptop for home working. So, my boss was having to phone everyone in the department to go through a set process which involved reading a page of text to me over the phone. I'm guessing it was a page. In practise it was just speech that went on, and on, and on.

So in the end, I found myself grabbing an empty bucket in the garage and somehow with my phone on speakerphone (I needed two hands) pulling the tight elastic waist of my one piece cycling bib shorts down low enough to reach out my penis, at the same time as holding the bucket at an angle and peeing down the side of it so that no splashing would be heard.  The relief of course was amazing.

I've enjoyed using that bucket a few more times since - but never whilst on the phone again (yet).

[Kupar 12,419]

Yes - I've done something similar in the past too. Like pouring a lager, it's the aiming carefully down the side that's the key thing here. I guess you had to, @gldenwetgoose, but speakerphone would be a risk - turns up the gain on the mic!

[Adyguy6970 813]

49 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

I've done the sit down and aim against the porcelain once or twice in the past too.  The last pee on the phone I remember though was during last year's lockdown.

It was at that point where the country had been at a complete standstill for a few weeks, and I'd been 'working from home'. Inverted commas because I didn't have any company issued IT and so no ability to work on my secure projects.  Instead lots of browsing time, jobs around the house and time on my cycle turbo trainer in the garage.  It was one afternoon I'd been cycling in the garage for about an hour, well hydrated and warm when my mobile rang - my local head of department.

Of course I stopped cycling to talk to him, and as soon as I did, the urge to pee hit.  What I do find is that cycling pretty much suppresses any need to pee - or at least moves the pressure point. As soon as I stopped, then the need was back instantly.  And it turned out the phonecall was a telephone 'induction' into safe Covid working practises for going into the office to collect a laptop for home working. So, my boss was having to phone everyone in the department to go through a set process which involved reading a page of text to me over the phone. I'm guessing it was a page. In practise it was just speech that went on, and on, and on.

So in the end, I found myself grabbing an empty bucket in the garage and somehow with my phone on speakerphone (I needed two hands) pulling the tight elastic waist of my one piece cycling bib shorts down low enough to reach out my penis, at the same time as holding the bucket at an angle and peeing down the side of it so that no splashing would be heard.  The relief of course was amazing.

I've enjoyed using that bucket a few more times since - but never whilst on the phone again (yet).

Thanks for sharing that.  Who knows but what the opportunity to do something similar might arise again?  After all, there's no reason to interrupt a phone call just because you need to go.  If anything the one lesson I learned was to make sure if future I have pants or trousers that can be dropped easily if necessary.   I could have used a large measuring jug that I keep downstairs for occasions when I don't want the hassle of going upstairs, but it would rather have given me away.