Had to get creative in the kitchen!

[chubbybirb999 1,560]

So my house is freezing during this time of year. We have seriously bad insulation and I can often get really susceptible to the cold, as far as my bladder goes. 

This happened about an hour ago. Myself and my flat mate were laying in my bed playing games; he was playing an MMO and I was playing Stardew Valley on my Switch. I had a mild need to pee, but tried to ignore it as I was warm and happy under my covers with my flat mate. It happened though that we needed snacks and juice. I hopped out of bed and gravity put a bit more pressure on my bladder, but I reckoned I would have more than enough time to get to the kitchen, get the juice and biscuits and bring them back to the bedroom before heading in to pee. I reckoned wrong. 

I went from about a 5 to a 9 by the short time it took to get to the kitchen. The cold air had left me totally at the mercy of my bladder which was contracting in anticipation of release. I wasn’t sure what to do. If I peed myself, there would be no way to explain that and my flatmate would see me wandering through the flat either with wet trousers or naked. And I wasn’t in the mood for that. He would have been fine if either thing had happened but I wasn’t really willing to be wet and sticky. And I also knew I wouldn’t be able to drop everything and run to the toilet  as there was a 99% probability my bladder was going to give out in about 15 seconds. 

I glanced around the kitchen. There was absolutely nothing I could see to help me. I debated, for a split second, ripping my trousers down and just unleashing on the kitchen floor but I also knew we had no towels clean and dry (curse laundry day!) to fix my mess. The sink was piled with dirty dishes, my flatmate hadn’t done them after I cooked earlier on. Then I saw the flask 

I drink a lot of water and have several novelty cups/bottles/flasks with straws that can hold anything from 500ml to 2ltr of liquid. This one was a Disney pattern one that I had bought three years ago and had stopped using since I got an Overwatch themed one twice it’s size. Without thinking, I rippped my pyjama trousers clean off and stepped out of them. My bare arse faced the kitchen window, blinds open, on display for the world to see if they happened to glance over. I shoved the open flask between my legs and prayed I had positioned it right. I glanced downwards, half expecting to see a a stream of wee gushing out onto the floor. But with the steady sound of liquid hitting the bottom, the cup was rapidly filling. I peed strongly for half a minute, the cup half full by the time I trembled to a stop. I pulled the cup away, the last few drops trickling down my bare legs. I had to dilute the pee with water before pouring it down the sink. I dabbed at my wet bits with a bit of kitchen towel, threw it in the bin, replaced my trousers and went back into the bedroom with my snacks and juice as if nothing had ever happened. 

[speedy3471 10,655]

On 1/4/2019 at 5:48 PM, chubbybirb999 said:

So my house is freezing during this time of year. We have seriously bad insulation and I can often get really susceptible to the cold, as far as my bladder goes. 

This happened about an hour ago. Myself and my flat mate were laying in my bed playing games; he was playing an MMO and I was playing Stardew Valley on my Switch. I had a mild need to pee, but tried to ignore it as I was warm and happy under my covers with my flat mate. It happened though that we needed snacks and juice. I hopped out of bed and gravity put a bit more pressure on my bladder, but I reckoned I would have more than enough time to get to the kitchen, get the juice and biscuits and bring them back to the bedroom before heading in to pee. I reckoned wrong. 

I went from about a 5 to a 9 by the short time it took to get to the kitchen. The cold air had left me totally at the mercy of my bladder which was contracting in anticipation of release. I wasn’t sure what to do. If I peed myself, there would be no way to explain that and my flatmate would see me wandering through the flat either with wet trousers or naked. And I wasn’t in the mood for that. He would have been fine if either thing had happened but I wasn’t really willing to be wet and sticky. And I also knew I wouldn’t be able to drop everything and run to the toilet  as there was a 99% probability my bladder was going to give out in about 15 seconds. 

I glanced around the kitchen. There was absolutely nothing I could see to help me. I debated, for a split second, ripping my trousers down and just unleashing on the kitchen floor but I also knew we had no towels clean and dry (curse laundry day!) to fix my mess. The sink was piled with dirty dishes, my flatmate hadn’t done them after I cooked earlier on. Then I saw the flask 

I drink a lot of water and have several novelty cups/bottles/flasks with straws that can hold anything from 500ml to 2ltr of liquid. This one was a Disney pattern one that I had bought three years ago and had stopped using since I got an Overwatch themed one twice it’s size. Without thinking, I rippped my pyjama trousers clean off and stepped out of them. My bare arse faced the kitchen window, blinds open, on display for the world to see if they happened to glance over. I shoved the open flask between my legs and prayed I had positioned it right. I glanced downwards, half expecting to see a a stream of wee gushing out onto the floor. But with the steady sound of liquid hitting the bottom, the cup was rapidly filling. I peed strongly for half a minute, the cup half full by the time I trembled to a stop. I pulled the cup away, the last few drops trickling down my bare legs. I had to dilute the pee with water before pouring it down the sink. I dabbed at my wet bits with a bit of kitchen towel, threw it in the bin, replaced my trousers and went back into the bedroom with my snacks and juice as if nothing had ever happened. 

Nicely done. Maybe next time you can "rinse" the dirty dishes lol

[chubbybirb999 1,560]

So... an update! Literally the day after this happened, I went to the kitchen at about half midnight to make up some hot chocolate for myself and my flat mate. Same thing happened again! Only this time, I didn’t aim correctly and I peed about four centimetres worth into the cup and the rest on the floor!

[gldenwetgoose 21,488]

13 hours ago, chubbybirb999 said:

So... an update! Literally the day after this happened, I went to the kitchen at about half midnight to make up some hot chocolate for myself and my flat mate. Same thing happened again! Only this time, I didn’t aim correctly and I peed about four centimetres worth into the cup and the rest on the floor!

Ha ha - looks like you've 'programmed' your brain into that being the spot...  wonder what will happen next time?  Please share 😉

 

[Guest UnabashedUser]

On 1/4/2019 at 3:48 PM, chubbybirb999 said:

. I peed strongly for half a minute, the cup half full by the time I trembled to a stop. I pulled the cup away, the last few drops trickling down my bare legs. I had to dilute the pee with water before pouring it down the sink. I dabbed at my wet bits with a bit of kitchen towel, threw it in the bin, replaced my trousers and went back into the bedroom with my snacks and juice as if nothing had ever happened.