NotNowBob

I've often thought about this!

I'm pretty simple and my desire is for videos that are authentic or at least appear to be. So, what I would do is I would create a holding contest among real amateurs. I would recruit them by offering significant prize money for the winner. I think I would offer $1,000 for taking part and $5,000 for winning. Two women would consume a significant amount of fluid and then would need to travel somewhere in the city with someone filming them in a gonzo fashion (to make it look like candid capture). The contest would go until one girl gives up or pees herself. I would offer a $1,000 bonus to the loser if they lose through an accident rather than giving up to encourage them to push to their limits.

Maybe make it a tournament to find the girl with the ultimate bladder!

Ashamed. That's the core feeling at the time of the wetting, but that shame turns into excitement shortly after.

I had bladder issues as a kid (still do, but they are much better managed now). I had accidents pretty regularly until I was about 8 and occasionally (maybe once a year) until I was about 12. So, my childhood was tough and those memories are all tied into the kink today still

Desperation and accidents are my kink. Someone peeing themselves on purpose does very little for me and public peeing/golden showers, naughty peeing, etc. does literally nothing for me. To each their own, if that's their thing, but it's not what does it for me. 

You're right, this site leans towards the non-wetting side of the kink. Not entirely, but it absolutely leans that way. It's a very supportive and friendly space though.

With apologies for linking the competition, if you are looking for a board that leans the other way -- mostly wetting with a little of the rest -- try OmoOrg out: https://www.omorashi.org/

Taken together the two sites compliment each other very well.

I've written before about my experience with OAB in my life, but as a quick summary I've had occasions as an adult where I have lost control. I also sometimes engage in holding/staged accidents as fantasy. So, I have a somewhat unique perspective from most, I think. 

What I'll say is that a long, slow hold feels different than when I'm experiencing legitimate desperation. My understanding of that is that desperation is caused by a spasm in the bladder, which causes a sudden, intense need to go. With me, that doesn't happen all the time -- often enough, but not every time. So, if I'm just holding pee on a day when my bladder is behaving then the feeling I have is more of a constant pressure, but it's manageable. I rarely push it to the limit (because I don't want to actually weaken my bladder further), but when I have in past I never get to a point where it's truly impossible to stop the pee from escaping. I truly believe that when actual accidents happen from a long hold it's because the person has given up and decided that peeing is preferable to the pain of holding longer.

The sudden desperation is much different. Rather than a constant pressure, it feels like a punch to my bladder. The pee feels like it's right at the edge of my penis and I have to put all of my focus on stopping it. If there was some fullness before a spasm hits the urgency  is even more intense. On the occasions I lost control this happened about 2-3 times in quick succession and all I can say is there was literally nothing I could do to stop it. I can remember squeezing as tight as I could the last time and watching it just...escape.

My bladder is just built this way. About 20% of people's are. But, the other 80%...they don't experience that sudden punch and it's just far less likely they'll ever experience an actual loss of control.

Too much information? You just posted this to a forum called Pee Fans Dot Com.

You're fine. Probably don't share it at the Marketing meeting tomorrow though. And, in three years when you are deciding whether you should piss yourself on the packed, public bus at 5pm you'll think back to this post and chuckle. We would all benefit from taking a step back and laughing at the absurdity of our kink from time to time, while also accepting that as long as we're not hurting anyone it's perfectly fine.

I'm glad you enjoyed your virgin pants pissing experience, Durian. Seriously, I am. I may share your experience in about 30 min. Still deciding. 😉

I know there are a lot of people that think that men will just whip it out whenever they need to in this scenario. I'm here to tell you that, for me anyway, that's not true. I'm going to try and hold it until it becomes a go-now-or-time-to-change situation, but even then I'm going as deep into the bushes as I can get. I've been in some uncomfortable situations over the years...

I first connected wetting and sex when I was about 12. I had a lot of accidents as a kid (like 1-2 a year up until Middle School. and it was creating conflicting emotions even younger than that. I remember purposely doing it one day around that time and feeling strange after. I was embarrassed to have to tell my mother but I also started to realize it also made me feel good too. In the seventh grade I was lying in bed while my parents were entertaining a couple I didn't know. I woke up from the noise and realized that I needed to pee fairly badly. Not it's going to come out now bad, but it was noticeable. For some reason I decided to see if I could let some out then stop the flow. So, I did. Managed to stop it. Did it a second time and the damn burst. Totally wet the bed. I had to tell my parents, which required me to stand in front of stranger with pee soaked pyjamas. There was no confusion that I found the embarrassment exciting. From that point forward I was very aware that I was turned on by the thought of peeing myself, or seeing another person have an accident.   

12 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

To answer the question, my wife knew - or rather found out very suddenly as a consequence of my careless browsing.

I had a girlfriend that found out the same way. To her credit, she didn't shame me over it when she brought it up a few days later and even offered to try and accommodate me in the bedroom. What I said -- and this is literally the only time I've ever admitted it to another person in my life -- was that "This is a private part of me that I don't fully understand and that at least partially makes me feel ashamed. Thank you for not being judgmental,  but I'd appreciate it if we dropped this now and never brought it up again."

It was clear to me at that moment that I wanted to keep it private.

Aside: I'm still friends with her and we are in the same social circle and she has never betrayed me.

11 minutes ago, Bacardi said:

I keep it a secret 😬 I'm so shy and still recovering from being shamed about it by my ex. So as far as I know no one knows. 

Fear of kink shaming is a legitimate thing, especially if your kink includes wetting yourself. I'm sorry that happened to you..

I find that there is a resistance in this space to those of us that keep it secret. Those that successfully share the kink with partners are celebrated and the message is always "just be honest," and "it will make everything better." It's not that simple. This kink is not universally accepted. No one should feel that they need to be any more open than they are comfortable with.

About 5x a week. I often try to resist ejaculation in an attempt to teach myself how to have multiple orgasms. Been successful a few times, but it's a challenge! 

1 hour ago, ShyPeeMan said:

Does your partner know or is your pee fetish your little secret?

 

I'm too embarrassed to tell my partner as she doesn't even like me having to use the toilet while she is in the bath so I feel like I have to keep it a secret

I have never shared it with partners. There are a lot of people that do and it works for them, but I don't think that you should feel that you have to do that. I think, for some of us, this kink is something that works better for us if it's private. In my case, my turn on is accidental wetting so I don't feel there is much that would be added to my sex life if I shared it. I'd probably be moderately turned on the first time she peed herself for me, but it would eventually become something that became less and less interesting. 

I'd also worry that if the relationship went bad that she might kink shame me to people.

I'd be open to engaging in casual play with someone that shared the kink if it were to ever present itself, but I'm not interested in sharing with serious relationships.

On 9/14/2021 at 5:32 PM, Charl0tte said:

Do you guys have fond memories of weeing at school?

I trace my kink origin back to a legit accident I had on a school bus in Middle School. I don't share the details beyond that due to the site rules, but what I'll add here is that it wasn't my only school accident. What it was, however, was the only accident that other people knew about. On two other occasions when I was younger I had an accident in class that the teacher covered up for me. I actually think it's more common than we realize because a) kids are pretty self-involved and don't notice what other's are doing and b) teachers are motivated to help you cover it up because it looks bad on them if a kid pees themselves in class. I was very young the first time it happened so I don't really remember how it played out, but the second time it happened the teacher saw and casually asked me to stay at my desk at recess. Since I was at the back of the class no one else saw anything and after the rest of the kids left the teacher came to me desk and just asked if I had something to change into. I nodded and she told me to do so in the art closet at the back of the class. The janitor cleaned the mess up before recess was over and no one ever knew (or at least let me know they did).

The Middle School incident did not go unnoticed. There are probably still a few people in the world that only know me as the kid who peed himself on the bus... 

1 hour ago, Puddle said:

 character loses control and wets themselves after desperately holding it for ages, is mortified and maybe crying

 

It's entirely and fully this -- whether it's me losing control, or another person.

This kink is a very broad spectrum, but I would guess that the "real accident" folks are the narrowest among us in terms of what excites them. I welcome being told I'm wrong, but I suspect that if your kink is about seeing or imagining true accidents, you probably aren't interested in anything other than that -- it's the embarrassment  and shame that turns you on...

I'm not always happy with myself about this, but I recognize that it's what this is about.

Golden showers - 1

Pissing in naughty indoor locations. - 1

Pissing outdoors or in public - 1

Wetting - 5

Watching someone pee - 3

Drinking someone's pee - 0

Desperation - 5

I want to be controlled by a woman, or a couple. Ideally there would be another person (preferably female, but I can....be flexible)  that was not aware of my desperation kink involved as well. They would deny me and torture me for hours along with the other person. I would become desperate to pee. I would hold it as hard and long as I could. Eventually, it would be at the brink. I would beg them to let me go to the bathroom. They would deny. I would tell them I couldn't wait. I would see the other person (unaware of the kink) judging me. I would lose control and I would wet my pants in front of them and the stranger.

That...would be my fantasy.

Can I be the contrarian here?

I mean...I'm not opposed to this. It wouldn't stop me. However, I kind of separate my kink sexuality from my, for lack of a better way to put it, vanilla sexuality. So, I'm not necessarily overwhelmed by this idea. God speed if you do -- we all have our own thing -- but, I'm not turned on by the literal act of peeing. So, with that in mind, I'd prefer it to be clean when I go down. Bluntly, it will taste better. To me, anyway.

As I said, to each their own, but I am someone that doesn't need this kink to be part of all aspects of my sexuality. In fact, I kind of prefer that it's not.

As I said...contrarian. Apologies for interjecting. 

On 8/31/2021 at 10:18 PM, Iluvpeegals said:

I have a vivid imagination, if I know someone has peed outside, it’s easy for me to imagine them doing it for me. My question to all of you is how do you discreetly bring this up in conversation or ask?  
 

In a word: naturally. If you try and force a conversation to peeing you're probably going to come off as a bit weird, to be honest. And, they won't be interested in sharing. Although this fetish is still a bit underground, it's not unknown. So, if you're too pushy about it they might figure out that you're asking because it turns you on and that's probably not going to result in you getting the stories you want.

So, if things are loose and fun and you're having a good conversation you can probably point the conversation to this by sharing a story about yourself. Something like: "Oh my God you would not believe what I did last week. I was walking home after the pub and I had to pee so bad I thought I was going to pee myself. So..."

If you're laughing at yourself in a situation where you're sharing stories then they might share similar. I've been successful with this in getting real accident stories by telling a story about me peeing my pants in grade 7 on a school trip. But, it's an art -- you need to drop it in naturally. 

Welcome.

So, you just let loose naked, or do you wet yourself?

On 8/19/2021 at 12:40 AM, blaise said:

Great stories! I’m sorry for your embarrassment but as you say, the embarrassment is also part of the turn on.

Thank you. You're right. It's very confusing and trying to understand this (which has never hurt my life in a way that I can't deal, but that has always been there -- truthfully, the frequency is more of an issue than the embarrassing issues I outlined. People are actually fairly understanding and reasonable about really embarrassing moments, but are less patient when you have to stop the car a second time on a 60 min drive...).

I denied my feelings for years. But, I'm not anymore. Looking for the balance. If I can share things that others enjoy while doing so, all the better....

I promised a poster in another thread that I would share my story, so here we go. I have lived most of my life with OAB. I suspect that it's tied into my kink and it's something that I am ambivalent about to say the least. I have learned ways to keep it under control so that it doesn't impact my life that much, but it's still an annoying and embarrassing condition. Some here might think that it would be great to have legit bladder issues, but I can tell you that having the ability to separate your kink life fro your real life is something to celebrate.

But, it's confusing since I'm also turned on (after the fact) by the embarrassment.  As I said, that's very much an after the fact thing. During is terrible.

Anyway, this is what this has looked like for me over the years.

The first thing I need to stress is that this is not a full on incontinence issue. Full on accidents are rare. The biggest issue is frequency. I need to pee a lot more than most people and sometimes the urge to pee comes on fast and is quite intense. It's hard to explain to someone that has not experienced it, but OAB desperation feels different than when you have just held on for a long time. It's like being punched vs being squeezed.  It's much harder to hold it.

I usually can though. About 1-2 times a month I will have an incident where I will suddenly need to use the bathroom very badly and very quickly. When that happens I need to drop what I'm doing and get to a bathroom. It's a run don't walk situation. Since I always find where the toilets are immediately when going somewhere new and I know all the public places to go in my neighbourhood, it's usually fine. I can hold the urge for 15-20 min without issue. It's very rare you're that far away from a place to pee.

Ok, look: a couple times a year there is some damage before I get there. About a teaspoon usually. Rarely bad enough to even show. Sometimes it's been a little worse that that, but I know how to hide the damage and avoid being embarrassed too much. I don't consider these incidents as accidents. An accident is a full loss of control. Down the legs, puddle at your feet stuff.

That's happened to me three times as an adult. A few more before that. I suspect it will happen again. That fear has made it difficult for me to make romantic connections and is something I'm trying to come to grips with. 

So, the accidents. I'm not going to go into detail about the ones before I turned 18. The takeaways there is that having two accidents within 6 months when I was 12 was the impetus to getting diagnosed (and since one was on bus on a school trip, more than a little mortifying).

When I was 21 and at college I was walking home from a bar when I got hit with a massive urge. The walk was about 20 minutes, but the intensity of the urge made me very concerned about whether I would make it. So much so that I got off the main road where there was a lot of people around in case I had an accident. The walk was intense and I was viably desperate -- grabbing my crotch, bending, bouncing the whole nine yards. I actually did make it back to the house I shared with 6 other people. Got in the door. Ran to the downstairs bathroom. My roommate and his girlfriend were showering together. They weren't coming out anytime soon. This is bad. But, we had a bathroom upstairs too. So, I ran up the stairs. Since you're reading this now, you can guess what I found. Taken. Roommate was sick. I could not access either bathroom. In hindsight what I should have done is go outside to our yard. But, that's not what I did. Instead, I went to my room to try and wait this out. I was standing in the middle of my room when a massive wave hit. I bent down to try and hold it. I did, but it was bad. So, I thought that maybe it would be easier to hold it if I sat so I walked over to a chair I had. Sat. As I was sitting, I felt it come out. I had no control. I sat there with the warm pee pooling around my ass and down my legs. I had pissed my pants relatively recently, but I somehow thought that I wouldn't as an adult. Apparently not. No one found out, but I did admit to my roommates that it happened a few months later. 

The second time was three years later. This one is bad. I was working about two hours north of the city and was coming home for a weekend off with two co-workers. I had a Coke early in the dive, which I didn't think would be an issue. Then the traffic hit. There had been a car accident on the highway and we were not moving at all. That two hour drive was suddenly twice that. 30 min pass and I start to feel it. I had to pee. I tried to convince myself that it would be fine, but it was getting worse by the minute. 10 more minutes and I'm squirming in my seat. 10 more minutes after that and I am in full panic mode. I have peed my pants before, but it's been since grade 7 since I had done so with other people -- people I know -- around. This was bad. I can feel the pee about to come out. At this point I decided that if I was going to pee my pants that I at least needed to tell the girl that was beside me in the back seat that things were bad. I can still remember turning to Sarah and saying "I have to pee really badly." She saw the panic on my face, I think,  and tried to reassure me that it would be fine. I was quiet for a bit, staring out the window. I looked at her and said "No, Sarah, you don't understand. I seriously don't know how much longer I can hold it." She was great, to be honest. But, still didn't fully understand how bad things were. Having said this, it gave me permission to be obvious in my efforts to hold it. I was crunched up into a ball with my hands pushed into my crotch. It took about 3 minutes. I can remember the pressure pushing against the top of my penis and feeling that first dribble come out. I stopped it, briefly. Then a second wave, Nothing I did could stop it for a good 2-3 seconds. I looked at my pants and there was a wet spot about 3 inches and I could feel my ass wet too. Maybe that site told my body that there was no point, but I felt a bit more come out and I could not stop it. I looked at Sarah and said "I'm going to pee my pants." then just looked down at the floor. It just came out. All of it. I could feel it around my ass and running down my legs. Sarah, was very supportive. Good girl, she was. But, man. I totally pissed my pants in front of her and in another person's truck.

The third time was four years ago. This isn't the most interesting story, but it's why I'm convinced it will probably happen again. It had been several years and, although there were some close calls and leaks, I hadn't had a full on accident since the drive above. I was walking home and about 10 min from home a massive wave hit me. I ran to my house and got through my outside door. As I was trying to open my apartment door the most intense wave hit and I bent forward and squeezed as hard as I could but I just couldn't stop it. Fully peed my pants. No one saw -- and I only just told my roommates at the time it happened -- but it still underlined to me that I will never have full control of my bladder.          

On 7/30/2021 at 8:31 AM, trienergy said:

I've been experimenting with different drinks to see which make me pee more often. The standard diuretics like tea soda and coffee just don't do it anymore for me. I don't drink alcohol. I have found that hot chocolate seems to make me have to go more so then anything else so far that I've tried. Funny thing is I seem to pee more then the amount of liquids I consume. I cant figure out where the extra liquid is coming from. Anyway what drinks make you pee the most.   

I don't purposely hold it very often, but I actually have OAB. So, I can tell you what triggers it (and what I have to avoid if I want to avoid issues).

Alcohol, obviously, but the biggest trigger for me is tied into when I have the drink. If I have cold, carbonated drinks with caffeine in them on an empty stomach it will hit me like a ton of bricks within about 30 min. I make sure I'm within 5 min of a bathroom when I have a Coke on an empty stomach because I will be full on desperate 2-3 times within 90 min of having it. Pretty much every time I've had a leak over last 10 years or so has been as a result of this very thing and if I was denied a bathroom for more than 20 min or so more in those scenarios I'm fairly certain I would have fully lost control.

Full accidents, since I suspect some would like to know, have been rare and involved a combination of quick onset and toilet delay. In my day-to-day, I tend to try to avoid that...   

I've known of WetSet for years and lurked there for a while without out ever registering. My kink was a once every 2 months thing where I'd basically OD on content for 12 hours then go back to the real world. I wasn't really looking for answers. It was something closer to an addict getting a hit and going on a bender. 

When I decided that I needed to figure out a way to incorporate this part of me in a healthier and more consistent way I started looking around for a place where I could have more consistent interaction and where that interaction wasn't just spank bank stuff (I'm fine with a little of that, to be clear, but if that's all that's there it gets a little dull. 

Wetset is pretty much dead now, so I crossed it off the list. I tried Omorashi and...it's OK. I'll probably read it a couple times a week and the kink preference does tip more towards wetting over there. However, this is clearly the busiest place. So, it's here.

So, the short answer (you're going to learn "short" isn't my strength) is that I learned of you through Wetset reading other posters at Wetset.

8 hours ago, justanotherfan said:

Now I just wanna know if someone else had problems with accepting their Kink and how they overcome it. It annoys me to feel so embarrassed and disgusting over something I can't change. 

I essentially have joined and decided to participate in this forum for the very same reason. It has taken me years to get to the point where I have accepted that the kink is deeply rooted in my sexuality and is always going to be part of what excites me. But, fully accepting it to the point where I am totally at peace with it?

No. That's a work in progress and it's going to probably be a while before I find what the right balance is. That's important because my kink is tied into humiliation and shame and I am equally turned on by that if it's happening to me or I'm seeing it happen to someone else. Basically, I'm into accidental wetting and the more embarrassing it is the more it turns me on (for instance, a person who laughs too hard and pees herself. As I've written elsewhere, I self-identify as a CIS, hetro male, but I also would classify myself as about 90% straight, 10%...let's call it...open minded) .

That offers me some ethical questions as it relates to consent. Less so if I'm talking about me being on the bottom side of humiliation -- although not entirely. I draw the line at having an "accident-on-purpose" in front of a stranger because I know it's for my sexual gratification, even if they don't. That said, I do occasionally act visibly distressed in public because that idea that people are looking at me being desperate does turn me on and it doesn't feel like it's as intrusive as actually peeing yourself would be. I also will share stories of accidents I've had with people, if the conversation naturally goes there. 

When it comes to others having accidents it's far more complicated. I 100% would never put someone in a situation where they were desperate, or purposely delay someone getting to the bathroom in hopes of them having an accident. That's an absolute no go to me. In fact, it's sexual assault. I have been in situations over the years where someone with me has become desperate and I actually overcompensate to try and get them to a washroom. I've never had someone in that situation not make it, but if it did I would accept that I'd be turned on by it -- it's just part of me -- but that I did not cause it or make it more likely.

I would probably be walking funny and, if the night went well after she cleaned up I suspect I would be eager to make her feel like a woman again. If you follow.

Don't be a creep; don't be an asshole is my rule. I allow myself to watch videos of "real" accidents because a) they probably aren't real -- I can think of about 5 all-time that I believe are 100% true life accidents and B) There is a level of consent given by virtue of them being uploaded to YouTube/wherever.  

Ultimately, if I can scratch this itch while also feeling ethically sound I think I can get to a point of, at least, partial acceptance.      

29 minutes ago, blaise said:

Hi Bob! I’m not a frequent poster but I have to say I’ve enjoyed yours and would love to hear some accident stories, if you’re comfortable sharing. Thanks!

Thank you. I will share in detail soon.

I'll tell you now that I have had what I would call a full accident three times as an adult. about 2-3 times a year I have close calls do to OAB and they sometimes involve small leaks before I get to the bathroom and, additionally, I have wet the bed occasionally (about once a year, on average, my whole life).

In terms of the accidents before I was 18, I will avoid giving details because I was a minor.