Caught In The Act... Very Nearly

[gldenwetgoose 20,282]

i guess anyone who pees outdoor is going to get caught... sooner or later.

Today was the closest I've come to date.  I think I got away with it - just.  Late morning, a few coffees filtering through and I got a phone call from my jewellers that my necklace was ready to collect from repair. Cockatiels and chains don't mix too well.

So I jumped in my car and set off. There's two routes I can take, one being 20 minutes of A-road and the other a similar length of marrow country lanes. With the sun shining brightly and clear skies there was no question.  Also, I quite fancied the idea of stopping somewhere for a fresh air pee.  I took a slightly different route onto roads I'd not used before, but heading in the right duration, all very scenic.

One of the things about filter coffee is it goes through me pretty suddenly and hence I found myself feeling the need. Just about then I spotted a perfect location. I was on a narrow lane and on my right a junction onto another lane with a 'road closed - access only' sign.  So I pulled up just past the lane, then reversed back turning into the closed road.  It was narrow, so my 4x4 in the middle of the lane pretty much blocked it - but it was closed anyway.

So I stepped out and to avoid the muddy verge just stood right at the car door opening, peeing onto the grass in front of me. It was a fairly quick pee (fortunately) and I was quickly shaking the last drips off when I realised a car had pulled up straight in front of me, on the lane I'd driven up a few moments ago - a woman looking intently at me.  As it was I was jumping back into the car and she wouldn't have seen anything anyway  - I was behind the car door.

I initially assumed she wanted to turn into the road I was blocking, so started to pull out turning right in front of her.  Very quickly though I realised she'd stopped because of the huge farm tractor and silage trailer coming the other way and trying to turn into the lane I was blocking. After a very awkward moment I was able to pull out of the way enough for the tractor to turn in, the stream of cars stuck behind it to drive past and then her to proceed before I pulled out behind her.

The rest of the trip was uneventful apart from the draft when I parked and got out of the car outside the jewellers - with my fly still wide open.

Despite all of the chaos I caused, there was a definite thrill there and the relief of the pee in the fresh air remains amazing.