Yesterday K (my wife – I wonder whether I can stop explaining that now?) was visiting her parents for the day, and I was doing jobs around the house. I was very pleased to receive a WhatsApp message from her around lunchtime suggesting that we have a ‘session’ when she got home; it was my turn to choose what we do (we have this system, see). First, I did what I thought was right. I was sitting in the garden enjoying the sunshine, so I WhatsApped her a dick pic … and got a very swift rebuke