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Things that annoy you about pee porn


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  • 6 months later...
6 hours ago, Sophie said:

Generic commentary from model-who-actually-isn't-into-it number 4315 - "Oh it is so warm. That feels SOOOOOO good. I had to pee SO bad"

Why do they all say that? It's the pee equivalent of the fake moans porn stars do.

Acting is really a lot more difficult than it looks,  and porn actors are not chosen particularly for their acting skills.  Still I guess you could also blame the director sometimes.

Still there are some good performances that really make up for it.   I once saw a scene with an attractive couple where the girl is trying to persuade her boyfriend to let her pee on him,  but he's not really into it.   They managed to make that bit of dialog look very sexy indeed,  or at least it seemed so to me at the time.  (She did persuade him in the end 🙂 )

 

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14 hours ago, Sophie said:

Generic commentary from model-who-actually-isn't-into-it number 4315 - "Oh it is so warm. That feels SOOOOOO good. I had to pee SO bad"

Why do they all say that? It's the pee equivalent of the fake moans porn stars do.

I agree.  More is often less.  I once saw a film many years ago which featured a couple in an early morning bedroom scene.  Pee wasn't mentioned and it didn't play a part in the story so far as I remember.  However the male partner clearly needed to pee.  It was obcious from his body language and demeanour.  Now that would have been very difficult to fake so I'm assuming he had a full bladder in reality.  It just added to the authenticity of the situation without being in any way central to it.  

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14 hours ago, Sophie said:

Generic commentary from model-who-actually-isn't-into-it number 4315 - "Oh it is so warm. That feels SOOOOOO good. I had to pee SO bad"

Why do they all say that? It's the pee equivalent of the fake moans porn stars do.

In the last week the classic example has been posted on this very site. 
Pornhub clip of a girl so desperate to pee outside a locked bathroom - so desperate that her only course of action is to strip naked and masturbate - because being naked makes it so much easier to hold as we all know. 
and between masturbating nakedly and acting desperate, shouting and asking “who’s in there” (because, doesn’t everyone get naked when there’s a complete stranger on the other side of the door). 
Still - to look for the positives, she was very attractive and squirmed beautifully. 

Edited by gldenwetgoose
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22 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

In the last week the classic example has been posted on this very site. 
Pornhub clip of a girl so desperate to pee outside a locked bathroom - so desperate that her only course of action is to strip naked and masturbate - because being naked makes it so much easier to hold as we all know. 
and between masturbating nakedly and acting desperate, shouting and asking “who’s in there” (because, doesn’t everyone get naked when there’s a complete stranger on the other side of the door). 
Still - to look for the positives, she was very attractive and squirmed beautifully. 

I can't say that I've seen the clip in question although it sounds as though I've not missed a great deal either.  It sounds suitably implausible.  In order for any kind of stimuli to work for me it has to be believable - something that could actually happen.  

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2 minutes ago, Adyguy6970 said:

I can't say that I've seen the clip in question although it sounds as though I've not missed a great deal either.  It sounds suitably implausible.  In order for any kind of stimuli to work for me it has to be believable - something that could actually happen.  

Agreed @Adyguy6970 - It struck me as much for the polarised love and criticism it was getting - and yes, I agree the girl in question is undoubtedly hot.

I would have loved to see that girl  in a clip where clearly desperate, she chose to play with herself until she exploded  - no need for the pretense of an occupied bathroom. 
No criticism of those who’ve posted it and been very positive about it - it is in all other respects very hot (IMHO). 
https://peefans.com/topic/16753-gorgeous-brunette-falls-apart-when-the-bathrooms-taken/

 

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This topic is quite relative to a topic I just posted in this subforum, about a really bad VHS piss porn video I once had. Mostly it featured women just sort of wiggling around in front of the camera - not even doing a proper striptease or anything, just trying to look sexy (and failing badly). At the end of each woman's scene, she'd pee, then we'd get a slow-mo review of her peeing. It universally just looked awkward instead of sexy. The camera angles were terrible, the peeing poses (sort of crab-walk-squats, often) looked nothing but awkward and uncomfortable, and even if the women were attractive there was no *engagement* with them - nothing to make us want to watch other than that they were naked.

It looked like a video by a porn director/producer/cameraman who didn't care about the subject and was just turning out *something*. The girls didn't seem to care much either, they were just doing a gig.

Even in the era when pee porn was really hard to find, I never wanted to watch it again, and I threw it away right away.

 

 

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  • 7 months later...

Bad lighting is rampant. You peed in that picture? I guess I'll have to trust you.
 

The best staging is against a black or dark background, and lit from behind or from an oblique angle. If it's done right, the stream catches the light and will sparkle against a dark background. Sets are often over- or under-lit. It's all about the contrast and the angle.

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8 hours ago, deliquescent said:

Bad lighting is rampant. You peed in that picture? I guess I'll have to trust you.
 

The best staging is against a black or dark background, and lit from behind or from an oblique angle. If it's done right, the stream catches the light and will sparkle against a dark background. Sets are often over- or under-lit. It's all about the contrast and the angle.

Totally agree...  I get that outdoors, especially in public situations it'd be inconvenient and very conspicuous to have a couple of LED lighting panels clustered around the model - although in a forest scenario for example a folding pop-up reflector wouldn't be too unmanageable.  Indoors in a dedicated set there's really no excuse.

My other pet hate is the sound quality - when it's outdoors and background traffic noise or an aeroplane flying over completely obliterates any chat between the models, which for me is often the key part of the clip. It's not like they'd need to be radio-mic'd up, although that's a possibility.  Just a decent directional mic should do the trick. The same can be said for the sound indoors in some clips too, where the sound of heels slapping on a cheap wooden floor drown out any nuance of sighing, or the hiss of their pee.  I know technology and with it quality has advanced no end recently, and much of the content we see is slightly older now though.

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  • 2 months later...
2 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Apologies to anyone without Gold access - but just to redress the shower balance, here's something a little more genuine.

(And apologies to anyone rightly offended by hidden camera material)

I'm wondering how hidden camera this one is actually. The cameras are moving. Incidentally, she's in the shower wearing a swimming cossie. I've never understood that really. A bit like those adverts for walk-in baths with Judith Chalmers in her one-piece, in a perspex bath. Ah well. Nice vid 🙂

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I really despise men who talk over the audio in the background, like THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU SHUT UP ALREADY. I also hat when a girl says she REALLY needs to go, but then pees two squirts and calls it a day. Like, you really didn't earn the money from that scene. I'm pretty sure that if Tom Hanks did that in a League of Their Own, the scene wouldn't have been that good.

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I have to admit that I'm pretty picky on what I prefer.

  1. I'm surprised few people have mentioned this: When the cameraman zooms in all the way on the girl's pussy. It significantly detracts from the excitement the video is supposed to provide as you don't see the entire picture. For God's sake, please show their entire face!
  2. My preference is for the girl to be in a natural position. And part of that is preferrably not using her arms to support herself. I agree with RedHatter76 with regards to "extreme" poses where she's deliberately putting on a show, though for me exceptions apply if the girl manages to do it well. Examples of exceptions for me include this one and this one.
  3. Any camera/shutter sounds. Again, extraneous noise that detracts from the video's excitement.
  4. Most shit from VIpissy and the like. Obviously staged, often exaggerated, same thing with most professionally-produced porn. Again there's a few exceptions that are good enough, but most of it is trash.
  5. Anything where the girl gets caught. I'm not into that stuff and there are several clips that would have been excellent if it weren't for the girl getting caught. So peeing on a seat is a no-go.
  6. Dark/concentrated urine.
  7. Wetting is a huge turn-off for me. No golden showers either except for a few select circumstances (mostly fantasies involving friends and celebrities). Also, no drinking because I find it disgusting.
  8. And of course, fake/staged dialogue. The "fake but you're fooled into thinking it's real" shit is even worse.
  9. Contrary to what others have stated, I don't like it when they show the "aftermath" of what the girl did. I prefer to just film the girl walking away.

 

On 6/26/2016 at 8:20 PM, UnabashedUser said:

Perfect! The 'signs of arousal' i.e. vagina wine is and of itself extremely erotic, as are the tiny drops of urine descending towards the protruding anus (also extremely arousing) you can tell from her grimace that she's putting a lot of force into the stream. Great pic.

Bingo.

Edited by dltq
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