Peeing etiquette/comfort among friends?

[Carb0nBased 513]

I got thinking about this after my recent sighting at the beach (see here https://peefans.com/topic/6940-ladies-piss-aftermath-puddles/?do=findComment&comment=333866). Namely, particularly for girls and women (but guys can answer too, as I'm sure this varies greatly among our gender as well), how good a friend do you have to be with someone to be comfortable with what level of peeing with/in front of her (or him).

In the sighting I described, I mentioned that from far away, it looked almost like the two women (presumably friends) not only went to the dunes together, but that they could have been almost touching side by side. When I actually went up there to check, however, the puddles were spaced apart enough that they were almost in separate little clearings in the beach grass, and wouldn't have necessarily seen much of each other. So, I'm wondering, around how many of your friends would you be comfortable peeing within arm's length of? What about actual physical contact while in the act (like supporting someone mid-squat somewhere where the footing is bad)? How far away/hidden from each other is "OK" for what level of friendship? Is the answer different in a bathroom vs. in the woods or somewhere else that isn't specifically made for peeing? Do you sometimes have people YOU would feel comfortable peeing close to, but don't dare because you don't know if it would weird your friend out and don't want to risk that?

In my case as a guy, I generally wouldn't follow a guy friend somewhere to go pee. If me and a friend both needed to go, and we were outside or whatever, I'd imagine we'd either go to separate trees/holes in the bushes, or take turns in one. There is kind of an exception for bathrooms though--like if there were more than one urinal then each using one rather than taking turns would feel more logical, because it's one of the few places where there's an expectation that you will pee with others nearby. And after peeing next to a friend at urinals for a while, I'd be more likely to also do so out in nature. I'm quite socially awkward though, and generally don't form very close friendships (though I sometimes wish I had one)--plus there are probably cases it would be ok to pee with someone but I worry I'd make a mistake doing it because of missing social cues. Also to be clear, this is about conscious mental/emotional "okayness", not "pee shyness", which is a subconscious thing. I've had difficulty getting started peeing while next to people I totally didn't mind peeing around.

 

Edited August 27, 2022 by Carb0nBased

[Bacardi 9,048]

I wouldn't be comfortable peeing in view of my friends, male or female. I don't even like peeing in front of strangers in a bathroom, don't like people hearing or even knowing I have to use the bathroom. I am just a shy girl lol.

If I'm not peeing I'd probably allow myself to stand a bit closer to a friend who is peeing, but I cant say whether or not I'd be turned on. It would depend on where they are peeing I guess. If it were in the hallway of a hotel I probably would be because I love naughty peeing, especially on carpet 😎 but if it were somewhere else like in a bathroom or outside it would probably just remain neutral.

[Peenicks 853]

I have no qualms peeing around most of my friends and (while I can't speak for all of em') I think that generally applies vice versa. My rule of thumb is if I feel comfortable sleeping at their place, I probably feel comfortable peeing with em' around, usually don't mind if they peek either (probably should keep that fact to myself tho, in case I ever decide to start doing AirBnB lol).

Edited August 28, 2022 by Peenicks

[Takashi96 847]

 

5 minutes ago, Bacardi said:

I wouldn't be comfortable peeing in view of my friends, male or female. I don't even like peeing in front of strangers in a bathroom, don't like people hearing or even knowing I have to use the bathroom. I am just a shy girl lol.

If I'm not peeing I'd probably allow myself to stand a bit closer to a friend who is peeing, but I cant say whether or not I'd be turned on. It would depend on where they are peeing I guess. If it were in the hallway of a hotel I probably would be because I love naughty peeing, especially on carpet 😎 but if it were somewhere else like in a bathroom or outside it would probably just remain neutral.

I strongly relate to this. But in my case, dealing with urinals adds another dimension to the problem. I don't like people to hear me either, but if I use a stall it's even louder. If I aim my stream away from the water to mute the noise then it sounds like I'm up to some sketchy antics in there. 

The weird thing is, I wasn't like this until my teens. My pee shyness entered the building around the same time as masturbation (which was late for a male). 

But if I'm intoxicated, all bets are off and I'll pee anywhere and with anyone. 

 

 

 

[Takashi96 847]

In my totally unscientific observations, women seem to be less pee shy than men. I've never heard a guy say "I have to pee, guys come with me."

[Jonjet0208 679]

I’m cool with peeing in front of friends. If we’re travelling somewhere maybe we’ve all decided to stop for a pee break, so we’re likely all doing it together anyway. More often that not I’d still have my back to them but I’m not shy about doing with people close by. Quite a liberating feeling! 

[Carb0nBased 513]

3 hours ago, Takashi96 said:

In my totally unscientific observations, women seem to be less pee shy than men. I've never heard a guy say "I have to pee, guys come with me."

I think there are two things going on here--depending on whether they are in a place with bathrooms or somewhere outdoors--neither of which necessarily say anything about peeing while in view of someone else. 

In a place with bathrooms, going to the bathroom together is an opportunity to chat without the company of other people in the room (particularly guys). It doesn't necessarily men that they will leave the stall door open or go in the same stall. Yes, some women DO do those things, but even those who don't likely would talk to their friends at the sink or whatever. Men usually go in the bathroom and straight to the urinal, then straight back out (maybe after, hopefully, washing hands), so going with a friend more implies actually peeing together.

Outdoors, going in groups means they can help cover for each other/look for people coming, and feel less exposed (to random strangers). Plus there's the issue of it being less awkward to do something if others are doing it too, so I imagine there are some women who get the courage to pee in the bushes when their friends do it too. In fact I'd feel the same way myself with male friends, in a place where I wasn't exactly comfortable peeing in the first place--not being the first/only one makes it less awkward. This has nothing inherently to do with wanting to be looked at/look at that person. 

I'm sure women can shed more light on this--but I just wanted to say that your conclusion doesn't exactly follow from your observation.

 

[Johnboy777 3,452]

I have no problems with  peeing outdoors on a tree or in a bush  with a close male friend, however, I  wouldn't feel right pissing with a female. I respect the facts that females would like privacy while doing their business.  However, if the girl I'm with wants to pee in my company, I'd have no problems with pissing alongside her. That has happened at least 2X in a couple  of years.

[Alfresco 10,992]

In a kayaking club when we had river trips, it was common that everyone went to pee when we stopped for a break, so it tended to be a case of guys one way, ladies the other and it was natural to join in and pee with the guys.

If I am out walking, then I would typically excuse myself and pee on my own but if someone joined me I wouldn’t mind.

At a venue with toilets, I would normally go separately from others, which I have noticed seems to be the norm, even though the ladies seem to go in pairs.

[NortheastPeeFan 345]

I get embarrassed about peeing next to some guy I know, so I tend to avoid going to the bathroom at the same time they do.  I don't get that way about peeing next to a stranger, but for some reason the idea of peeing next to a friend or just somebody I know makes me feel embarrassed.  It's ironic...my fetish revolves around watching other guys pee, yet the thought of some guy I know seeing me pee makes me all nervous.

[Carb0nBased 513]

3 hours ago, Johnboy777 said:

I have no problems with  peeing outdoors on a tree or in a bush  with a close male friend, however, I  wouldn't feel right pissing with a female. I respect the facts that females would like privacy while doing their business.  However, if the girl I'm with wants to pee in my company, I'd have no problems with pissing alongside her. That has happened at least 2X in a couple  of years.

That sounds like a contradiction--I must be misunderstanding. Maybe you meant you wouldn't feel right going up to a female friend who walked off somewhere to pee and joining her, but if she's decides on her own to start peeing without moving away from you, you would not mind joining? or maybe what you'd have a problem with is asking if a woman wants to pee together, whereas you'd ask a guy?

[Carb0nBased 513]

1 hour ago, NortheastPeeFan said:

I get embarrassed about peeing next to some guy I know, so I tend to avoid going to the bathroom at the same time they do.  I don't get that way about peeing next to a stranger, but for some reason the idea of peeing next to a friend or just somebody I know makes me feel embarrassed.  It's ironic...my fetish revolves around watching other guys pee, yet the thought of some guy I know seeing me pee makes me all nervous.

I wonder if some of us develop this fetish because we were--or maybe still are--especially private about peeing. I was the kid who always peed in a stall as a kid (before high school), though now as an adult I rarely do. I am kind of like you in that just typical friends it's as awkward of not more so than with strangers. Basically, it's the friends that talking about sex with wouldn't feel awkward that I'd feel ok peeing around, and for many periods in my life I haven't had even one friend like that. 

Possibly it's in part the other way too--like if we see peeing as "exciting" growing up (not necessarily sexual, as that really doesn't start until later), maybe we're more likely to be shy around it than if we see it as just something boringly normal.

[Takashi96 847]

6 hours ago, Carb0nBased said:

I think there are two things going on here--depending on whether they are in a place with bathrooms or somewhere outdoors--neither of which necessarily say anything about peeing while in view of someone else. 

In a place with bathrooms, going to the bathroom together is an opportunity to chat without the company of other people in the room (particularly guys). It doesn't necessarily men that they will leave the stall door open or go in the same stall. Yes, some women DO do those things, but even those who don't likely would talk to their friends at the sink or whatever. Men usually go in the bathroom and straight to the urinal, then straight back out (maybe after, hopefully, washing hands), so going with a friend more implies actually peeing together.

Outdoors, going in groups means they can help cover for each other/look for people coming, and feel less exposed (to random strangers). Plus there's the issue of it being less awkward to do something if others are doing it too, so I imagine there are some women who get the courage to pee in the bushes when their friends do it too. In fact I'd feel the same way myself with male friends, in a place where I wasn't exactly comfortable peeing in the first place--not being the first/only one makes it less awkward. This has nothing inherently to do with wanting to be looked at/look at that person. 

I'm sure women can shed more light on this--but I just wanted to say that your conclusion doesn't exactly follow from your observation.

 

It wasn't a conclusion, it was an observation, and an unscientific one at that. I have witnessed countless situations where a woman went into a bathroom with at least one other female companion, where there is no stall available. Thus, one can logically conclude that they peed casually in one another's company. My most frequent observation of this phenomenon has been at house parties, where two or more women enter the bathroom together. I have never observed this behavior in men. There have also been a handful of times when after enduring a long line and finally entering the bathroom to pee alone, a female friend appeared out of nowhere requesting to join me (upsetting everyone behind me) , accompanied by one other woman whom I'd never met before that moment. In those particular incidents, we all peed in front of one another. 

In bathrooms with stalls, it seems women accept that they will have little choice but to hear one another peeing. In outdoor situations, female urination, because it leaves more flesh exposed, is more often performed in pairs or groups than in the male version.  

Edited August 28, 2022 by Takashi96
Clarity

[morty98 197]

I have no problems with peeing in front of my friends, regardless of their gender. If anybody is not cool with peeing in my sight or seeing me peeing, I respect that, though.

[pguy2981 930]

Most of my friends I am alright with peeing in front of, but only a couple am I comfortable peeing while touching them or them touching me in any manner. That situation has happened once and I had to use every ounce of will power not to get so much as she held onto my ankles, squatting and releasing an audible gush into my grass.

[Carb0nBased 513]

8 hours ago, Takashi96 said:

It wasn't a conclusion, it was an observation, and an unscientific one at that. I have witnessed countless situations where a woman went into a bathroom with at least one other female companion, where there is no stall available. Thus, one can logically conclude that they peed casually in one another's company. My most frequent observation of this phenomenon has been at house parties, where two or more women enter the bathroom together. I have never observed this behavior in men. There have also been a handful of times when after enduring a long line and finally entering the bathroom to pee alone, a female friend appeared out of nowhere requesting to join me (upsetting everyone behind me) , accompanied by one other woman whom I'd never met before that moment. In those particular incidents, we all peed in front of one another. 

In bathrooms with stalls, it seems women accept that they will have little choice but to hear one another peeing. In outdoor situations, female urination, because it leaves more flesh exposed, is more often performed in pairs or groups than in the male version.  

If it's at a house party then yes, they must be in the same room. I don't know to what extent they actually face each other while peeing--maybe you can answer that since it sounds like you've been in such a situation. I'm surprised that two women wanted to join you to pee rather than just go in by themselves. They must have really trusted you.

[Takashi96 847]

10 hours ago, Carb0nBased said:

If it's at a house party then yes, they must be in the same room. I don't know to what extent they actually face each other while peeing--maybe you can answer that since it sounds like you've been in such a situation. I'm surprised that two women wanted to join you to pee rather than just go in by themselves. They must have really trusted you.

I'm not clear on the "facing each other" thing? Is that a requirement to count as peeing together? I mean, unless it's a really small bathroom, it's not likely that you'll be directly in front of the person using the toilet. Though I have been in that situation once, in a half-bath about the size of a closet. And the girl, who I'd never met before had smiley faces on her knees. They were not tattoos.  

The reason the women went in with me was because they were at the ass end of the line and it was my turn. By asking if they could pee with me, they jumped ahead of everybody else ahead of them. I don't know why, but I give off kind of trustworthy, one of the girls vibes. Or at least I did in my 20s. 

[Johnboy777 3,452]

21 hours ago, Carb0nBased said:

That sounds like a contradiction--I must be misunderstanding. Maybe you meant you wouldn't feel right going up to a female friend who walked off somewhere to pee and joining her, but if she's decides on her own to start peeing without moving away from you, you would not mind joining? or maybe what you'd have a problem with is asking if a woman wants to pee together, whereas you'd ask a guy?

Contradiction? Not intended. Scenario: I am with a female friend (maybe in a park) and she casually remarks "I need to pee" and there are no restrooms in the area, and she decides to go behind some bushes to do her business. I would help her find a place to pee, but stay behind to give her privacy. I would only go to watch her pee if she invited me to. And If I  needed to piss after she was finished I would tell her so, and piss while she was still there.  Does that make it any clearer?

[Carb0nBased 513]

2 hours ago, Takashi96 said:

I'm not clear on the "facing each other" thing? Is that a requirement to count as peeing together? I mean, unless it's a really small bathroom, it's not likely that you'll be directly in front of the person using the toilet.

You said that you think women going into a bathroom together to take turns peeing shows that women are generally less pee shy than men. But men regularly pee in urinals next to other men. There is the etiquette, at least among men who don't know each other, to look at the wall rather than at the guy next to you, but you're still definitely peeing in the same room together.

What I meant is that if two women are in the same bathroom, but the one who isn't on the toilet faces a wall looking away from the toilet, then that could actually be less, or at least no more, of "peeing together" than men at the urinal. It seems some women intend it to be like this when they have a friend (of either sex) "guard" them when they are peeing to make sure nobody walks by and sees. If the two keep up a face-to-face conversation, or possibly one hands the other a tissue to wipe with, then that's indeed more intimate than anything most guys would do except maybe with good buddies.

[Carb0nBased 513]

2 hours ago, Johnboy777 said:

Contradiction? Not intended. Scenario: I am with a female friend (maybe in a park) and she casually remarks "I need to pee" and there are no restrooms in the area, and she decides to go behind some bushes to do her business. I would help her find a place to pee, but stay behind to give her privacy. I would only go to watch her pee if she invited me to. And If I  needed to piss after she was finished I would tell her so, and piss while she was still there.  Does that make it any clearer?

That IS clearer--so the difference is her giving an invitation to join rather than simply going off to pee. I would be the same way--I would assume a woman wants to go off and pee by herself unless she made no effort to move away and/or hide, or actually invited me to join her.

[Takashi96 847]

1 hour ago, Carb0nBased said:

You said that you think women going into a bathroom together to take turns peeing shows that women are generally less pee shy than men. But men regularly pee in urinals next to other men. There is the etiquette, at least among men who don't know each other, to look at the wall rather than at the guy next to you, but you're still definitely peeing in the same room together.

What I meant is that if two women are in the same bathroom, but the one who isn't on the toilet faces a wall looking away from the toilet, then that could actually be less, or at least no more, of "peeing together" than men at the urinal. It seems some women intend it to be like this when they have a friend (of either sex) "guard" them when they are peeing to make sure nobody walks by and sees. If the two keep up a face-to-face conversation, or possibly one hands the other a tissue to wipe with, then that's indeed more intimate than anything most guys would do except maybe with good buddies.

In that case then yes, women are less pee shy than men. Women will face one another and carry on conversations while one is on the toilet. And there have been many occasions where I've peed outside while conversing with women whom I'd never spoken with before that moment. Once I was sitting in the backyard of a house party talking with a friend when a random girl approached and said "no offense guys, but I'm gonna pee here." Then proceeded to squat a few feet in front of us and release her flood. She faced us and made small talk (we were sitting cross legged on the grass) while peeing. I assume she was drunk but she didn't seem like it. 

The part that you haven't factored in is the base line homophobia that men are indoctrinated into starting around puberty. That's why we look straight ahead at the urinals. In the straight world, no one wants their actions to be interpreted as homosexual advances. Likewise, there is a paranoia that someone will react violently if they interpret your actions as an unwanted advance. That kind of behavior is pretty foreign to the world of women. Straight men don't hold hands, put their heads on one another's shoulders or lay their heads on each other's laps in a way that's unquestioned among straight women. The default setting of intimacy between women is inconceivable to the world of straight men. And explains why it's natural for them to pee around each other without issue. 

 

Edited August 29, 2022 by Takashi96
Clarity.

[Carb0nBased 513]

23 hours ago, Takashi96 said:

In that case then yes, women are less pee shy than men. Women will face one another and carry on conversations while one is on the toilet. And there have been many occasions where I've peed outside while conversing with women whom I'd never spoken with before that moment. Once I was sitting in the backyard of a house party talking with a friend when a random girl approached and said "no offense guys, but I'm gonna pee here." Then proceeded to squat a few feet in front of us and release her flood. She faced us and made small talk (we were sitting cross legged on the grass) while peeing. I assume she was drunk but she didn't seem like it. 

The part that you haven't factored in is the base line homophobia that men are indoctrinated into starting around puberty. That's why we look straight ahead at the urinals. In the straight world, no one wants their actions to be interpreted as homosexual advances. Likewise, there is a paranoia that someone will react violently if they interpret your actions as an unwanted advance. That kind of behavior is pretty foreign to the world of women. Straight men don't hold hands, put their heads on one another's shoulders or lay their heads on each other's laps in a way that's unquestioned among straight women. The default setting of intimacy between women is inconceivable to the world of straight men. And explains why it's natural for them to pee around each other without issue. 

 

I feel like this has to be VERY social group/"scene" and culturally dependent. My experiences have not shown nearly the effect of gender that you have observed.

Maybe in some outgoing, extraverted circles what you're describing is true. Especially if you're the kind of nonchalant guy who makes really good casual conversation with party girls. I myself have never spent a lot of time in the party scene, and when I did, I usually was the guy sitting alone watching everyone, which may have made me seem "creepy" to some. I also have been alone so much that when I am talking with a girl, especially an attractive one, it seems like a "big deal" and maybe scares some women away or makes them feel put on the spot. Though at the same time, certain specific women can trust/respect me more than they would if I were a "frat boy" type--except they usually (with one exception, that I will write an observation about one of these days) are also reserved, shy, somewhat introverted women, who may be more pee-shy than the average woman.

That being said, I've been in a variety of situations, in none of them were women much more open about peeing than the guys. For instance:

-I knew a guy whose friend managed a network of au pairs, and they often had house parties. There were, for obvious reasons, many young women there, from around the world who were here to have fun and got quite drunk. I never saw many groups of them hanging out in the bathroom together, they in large part went in the bathroom one by one to do their business just like the guys. We also sometimes drove somewhere outside "in the country" to drink--there everyone who peed went down the hill to be a bit out of sight or whatever. A few times after a significant car ride after some drinking, a group of the au pairs would immediately go to a pee spot together. They were somewhat close together but it was too dark to see anything and they didn't talk about their peeing or anything.

-Once years ago I was at what I guess you could call a "neo-hippie" party that was held at night in a forest grove on private property. There was a residence on the property but the majority of the party was outside and everyone was expected to (and did) pee out there. The garden area was surrounded by bushes and guys mostly walked over to the bushes to pee with their backs facing the garden. Women either squatted along paths between the bushes or in an area with low walls specifically built for this purpose. I was never told by a girl she was going to pee, despite the atmosphere being open enough that we all used the hot tub naked and I had a significant conversation with a complete stranger girl who was also in the tub.

-I used to go on group hikes 5-10 times a year, many of them run by a guy who brought wine along and had us all drink alcohol when taking breaks. I've told a bunch of stories about that group here before. When sober, guys would usually wait for us to pause somewhere and go off into the bushes, often without saying what they were going to do. Women would go maybe a bit farther into the bushes, and sometimes they would talk about needing to go, but that was mainly because when one of them found a good spot that was well hidden, after coming out she would tell the others so they could take turns using it. Even after drinking there wasn't open peeing going on, and there were a few times when I casually looked in the direction one or more women were peeing and people got mad at me. I met a woman through this and we became friends. On the group hikes, she used to go off into the bushes while we were waiting for other people to arrive because she didn't want to have to do it on the walk itself. She didn't tell me this, I figured it out by observing. But even later after we were friends, when it was just her and I on a walk, she would either go while waiting for me to get to the trailhead or else tell me to wait somewhere while she went off and did her business.

-I used to be friends with some stoners in college and a few times we walked in the woods. Guys would typically go to a tree. Girls would either sneak away unannounced or would briefly announce that they were going to "pop a squat" before disappearing. The fact that some of the girls said something but the guys didn't seemed to have everything to do with the fact that for them it took longer and they didn't want anyone to wonder where they were. They didn't make peeing a social occasion.

So all in all, no big difference favoring women. There are loner guys like me who used the stall sitting down through much of childhood, and become less shy in adulthood (though in front of strangers outside I'm still shy)--and there are girls like Bacardi who are similar. Though if anything, it seems women are likely to stay shyer later into adulthood. Then there are the party girls who will pop a squat almost anywhere, but in those sorts of environments the guys are just as likely to use a tree in front of everyone.

I also don't get the whole homophobia thing. I think it's partly because I live relatively near San Francisco (though not *IN* SF), and here being gay is seen in many ways as something to celebrate. At certain kinds of parties, people would look at me and be like "you're one of those boring straight dudes, aren't you at least bi or something?". I've never felt a deep unfulfilled desire to lay my head in male strangers' laps or cuddle them that I have to hide in order to prove I'm straight. 

Edited August 30, 2022 by Carb0nBased

[Takashi96 847]

1 hour ago, Carb0nBased said:

I feel like this has to be VERY social group/"scene" and culturally dependent. My experiences have not shown nearly the effect of gender that you have observed.

Maybe in some outgoing, extraverted circles what you're describing is true. Especially if you're the kind of nonchalant guy who makes really good casual conversation with party girls. I myself have never spent a lot of time in the party scene, and when I did, I usually was the guy sitting alone watching everyone, which may have made me seem "creepy" to some. I also have been alone so much that when I am talking with a girl, especially an attractive one, it seems like a "big deal" and maybe scares some women away or makes them feel put on the spot. Though at the same time, certain specific women can trust/respect me more than they would if I were a "frat boy" type--except they usually (with one exception, that I will write an observation about one of these days) are also reserved, shy, somewhat introverted women, who may be more pee-shy than the average woman.

That being said, I've been in a variety of situations, in none of them were women much more open about peeing than the guys. For instance:

-I knew a guy whose friend managed a network of au pairs, and they often had house parties. There were, for obvious reasons, many young women there, from around the world who were here to have fun and got quite drunk. I never saw many groups of them hanging out in the bathroom together, they in large part went in the bathroom one by one to do their business just like the guys. We also sometimes drove somewhere outside "in the country" to drink--there everyone who peed went down the hill to be a bit out of sight or whatever. A few times after a significant car ride after some drinking, a group of the au pairs would immediately go to a pee spot together. They were somewhat close together but it was too dark to see anything and they didn't talk about their peeing or anything.

-Once years ago I was at what I guess you could call a "neo-hippie" party that was held at night in a forest grove on private property. There was a residence on the property but the majority of the party was outside and everyone was expected to (and did) pee out there. The garden area was surrounded by bushes and guys mostly walked over to the bushes to pee with their backs facing the garden. Women either squatted along paths between the bushes or in an area with low walls specifically built for this purpose. I was never told by a girl she was going to pee, despite the atmosphere being open enough that we all used the hot tub naked and I had a significant conversation with a complete stranger girl who was also in the tub.

-I used to go on group hikes 5-10 times a year, many of them run by a guy who brought wine along and had us all drink alcohol when taking breaks. I've told a bunch of stories about that group here before. When sober, guys would usually wait for us to pause somewhere and go off into the bushes, often without saying what they were going to do. Women would go maybe a bit farther into the bushes, and sometimes they would talk about needing to go, but that was mainly because when one of them found a good spot that was well hidden, after coming out she would tell the others so they could take turns using it. Even after drinking there wasn't open peeing going on, and there were a few times when I casually looked in the direction one or more women were peeing and people got mad at me. I met a woman through this and we became friends. On the group hikes, she used to go off into the bushes while we were waiting for other people to arrive because she didn't want to have to do it on the walk itself. She didn't tell me this, I figured it out by observing. But even later after we were friends, when it was just her and I on a walk, she would either go while waiting for me to get to the trailhead or else tell me to wait somewhere while she went off and did her business.

-I used to be friends with some stoners in college and a few times we walked in the woods. Guys would typically go to a tree. Girls would either sneak away unannounced or would briefly announce that they were going to "pop a squat" before disappearing. The fact that some of the girls said something but the guys didn't seemed to have everything to do with the fact that for them it took longer and they didn't want anyone to wonder where they were. They didn't make peeing a social occasion.

So all in all, no big difference favoring women. There are loner guys like me who used the stall sitting down through much of childhood, and become less shy in adulthood (though in front of strangers outside I'm still shy)--and there are girls like Bacardi who are similar. Though if anything, it seems women are likely to stay shyer later into adulthood. Then there are the party girls who will pop a squat almost anywhere, but in those sorts of environments the guys are just as likely to use a tree in front of everyone.

I also don't get the whole homophobia thing. I think it's partly because I live relatively near San Francisco (though not *IN* SF), and here being gay is seen in many ways as something to celebrate. At certain kinds of parties, people would look at me and be like "you're one of those boring straight dudes, aren't you at least bi or something?". I've never felt a deep unfulfilled desire to lay my head in male strangers' laps or cuddle them that I have to hide in order to prove I'm straight. 

I sort of blended two different example groups together. Both behavior that I've observed in women overall and that which I've seen among my own friends and acquaintances. I've been in countless situations where women in long bathroom lines enter in groups of two or more. I still don't understand how this saves time? Are they executing the toilet, tub, sink combo? In fact, the phenomenon of women and girls peeing in front of each other is a common enough occurrence that it happens with some regularity in movies and TV shows. If you've ever witnessed public piss footage from music festivals or street fairs then you've no doubt seen rows of women peeing together (though I'm sure men do the same). Or in photo albums of outdoor parties with all women, you'll often see at least one group squat shot. I've found group squats in the photo albums of FB friends. If it's entitled "girl's trip" and there's drinking involved there's a good chance you'll see a group squat. 

The most important element is alcohol. I never saw any of my female friends or acquaintances pee outside before I started drinking and going to parties. Or hanging out outside bars after closing time. After that, I started seeing it somewhat regularly. However, it slowed down dramatically after I hit my mid thirties and stopped going out at least twice a week. Female non acquaintances stopped peeing in front of me when I became visibly out of my twenties. And the women I used to regularly pee anywhere with got married and became moms. Peeing outside with no fucks given is generally a young person's game. Strange women don't roll up and pee beside me now that I'm grey. 

I'm sure hiking pees are no more or less discreet here in the midwest. I suspect the major difference is our lack of mountains. 

The homophobic thing is real out here. Furthermore, it has been my observation that the Bay Area is considerably more relaxed around homosexuality than the Detroit area. 

Edited August 30, 2022 by Takashi96
Clarity.

[Bacardi 9,048]

You guys are having a very serious conversation about this and it is entertaining me greatly lol. Should I see if I can get more girls to respond to this thread to sort of help confirm or deny these scientific theories you fellas are coming up with?

[gldenwetgoose 20,221]

It’s certainly an interesting topic and one which would benefit from a wider cross section of real experience.

I can only answer for myself and my experiences (let’s face it that applies to all of us doesn’t it?)

Ive got no qualms about peeing alongside other people, either friends or strangers - it happens pretty much every time I go into a pub or other public toilet.  In terms of outdoors etc again no issues.  And I imagine I’d have no problem with a mixed group either.

Of course not everyone thinks of pee sexually - for most people I imagine it’s a convenient solution to an inconvenient need. I’m going to leave it at that - anything further would be a work of imagination.