Cisgender Definition

[CalypsoIsland 9]

I’ve been asked by several people on here how can I be a lesbian, but also cis. This is absurd to me considering cisgender means that you identify your gender as your biological sex. Cisgender lesbian means My pronouns are she/her, and I’m biologically born female who is attracted to mainly other women. I don’t want to have to even put cisgender but I’ve gotten comments from men on this site saying “just to be sure you are a biological woman right?” Which is so rude and no trans woman should ever have to answer a question like that. And before someone comments about pre op trans women and “””your right to know.””””☹️That’s not what you asked. You’re saying “are you a real woman?” to real women. That’s why the term cisgender exist. So your questions can be answered without forcing a gender queer person to have a conversation with a transphobic ignorant person. 

I’m not saying everyone should have this in their bio. Or even MOST people. But can we at least get this term cleared up? 
This is supposed to be a safe place for people. For my friends on here. (Who if can tell this is me, keep it movin. Lol def don’t look at my profile. I’ll know by how you look me in the eyes the next day lmao.) 
 

I don’t understand the mix up. What do people on here think it means?

[gldenwetgoose 20,205]

Thanks for the clarification @CalypsoIsland - and makes perfect sense.  Cis describes that you identity now is the same as your biological birth status, and has nothing to do with your attraction to others or sexual preferences.

I'm reading a couple of things in what you've written ('...gotten comments from men on this site...' and 'This is supposed to be a safe place...') which worry me if they're actually talking about Peefans.  There's a sense in what you've written that you've been treated rudely and disrespectfully - and that's completely against the ethos and culture of this site.  If it's cut and paste from somewhere else that's fine, no issues.

Here on this site we ARE polite to one another, we don't call people out when their beliefs, views, culture, sexuality or anything else differ from ours, we have specific site rules in place but we barely need to use them - which in itself is wonderful.   Basically if people don't like what they see it's simple to scroll on by without creating conflict.  If there's something going on which is breaking site rules or just makes you uncomfortable then report it.  Click on 'Report' and put a description in there of what's wrong.  It's anonymous and we don't mind false alarms either.

[CalypsoIsland 9]

1 hour ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Thanks for the clarification @CalypsoIsland - and makes perfect sense.  Cis describes that you identity now is the same as your biological birth status, and has nothing to do with your attraction to others or sexual preferences.

I'm reading a couple of things in what you've written ('...gotten comments from men on this site...' and 'This is supposed to be a safe place...') which worry me if they're actually talking about Peefans.  There's a sense in what you've written that you've been treated rudely and disrespectfully - and that's completely against the ethos and culture of this site.  If it's cut and paste from somewhere else that's fine, no issues.

Here on this site we ARE polite to one another, we don't call people out when their beliefs, views, culture, sexuality or anything else differ from ours, we have specific site rules in place but we barely need to use them - which in itself is wonderful.   Basically if people don't like what they see it's simple to scroll on by without creating conflict.  If there's something going on which is breaking site rules or just makes you uncomfortable then report it.  Click on 'Report' and put a description in there of what's wrong.  It's anonymous and we don't mind false alarms either.

Hello again! ☺️☺️
I’m not going to play queer rights police. I said what I said. Like you say scroll on. It was told directly to me. Not a post on a topic thread. I’m not going to mess with peoples accounts reporting every things that only bothers me and a minority group of people unless I feel it’s unsafe. Caring about gender and human rights  in general has become a mockery of society. I don’t want to encourage resentment.  If you’re worried about me keeping the peace, don’t be. I’m okay with this post being the last thing I openly say. Big brother is watching. Got it. Got it. Only speak of piss🙏🏻. Amen. 

[gldenwetgoose 20,205]

Absolutely I wasn’t asking you to keep the peace - almost the opposite.  I was trying to express that you should be treated with respect  and a caring attitude here. You should absolutely not be made to feel awkward at all. 

Not all of our users speak English as a first language and sometimes translations can come across as blunt because they don’t have the subtleties of speech there. We accept that. 

I’m not saying that as an excuse though - if anyone was being critical, aggressive, unwelcoming or otherwise unaccepting to you then that is out of line. Our aim is to be equally open to everyone (on the assumption they repay that respect) without any bias of gender, preference, race, age or anything else. 
 

No issues either about being off the pee piste, I popped the conversation in here from a keeping the site organised perspective - but there is much more to Peefans than just pee too. 

[WantonLee 823]

11 hours ago, CalypsoIsland said:

[...]
I’m not going to play queer rights police. I said what I said. Like you say scroll on. It was told directly to me. Not a post on a topic thread. [...]

Hi Calypsoland,

when

12 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

[...] Basically if people don't like what they see it's simple to scroll on by without creating conflict.  [...]

, I think with "people" he meant the people bothering you; they should scoll by, not _you_ should scoll by their comments/questions.

At least this is how I interprete it.

@gldenwetgoose, correct me, if I am wrong.

 

Hope that helps.

o7

[gldenwetgoose 20,205]

4 hours ago, WantonLee said:

Hi Calypsoland,

when

, I think with "people" he meant the people bothering you; they should scoll by, not _you_ should scoll by their comments/questions.

At least this is how I interprete it.

@gldenwetgoose, correct me, if I am wrong.

 

Hope that helps.

o7

Thanks @WantonLee - you’re spot on there. 
 

And reading back, seems I missed a key word - what I meant to write to @CalypsoIsland was “if other people don’t like what they see then they should scroll by…”.   A small word and hopefully makes it much clearer. 

[thisguy20 868]

On 5/18/2022 at 10:08 PM, CalypsoIsland said:

I’ve been asked by several people on here how can I be a lesbian, but also cis. This is absurd to me considering cisgender means that you identify your gender as your biological sex. Cisgender lesbian means My pronouns are she/her, and I’m biologically born female who is attracted to mainly other women. I don’t want to have to even put cisgender but I’ve gotten comments from men on this site saying “just to be sure you are a biological woman right?” Which is so rude and no trans woman should ever have to answer a question like that. And before someone comments about pre op trans women and “””your right to know.””””☹️That’s not what you asked. You’re saying “are you a real woman?” to real women. That’s why the term cisgender exist. So your questions can be answered without forcing a gender queer person to have a conversation with a transphobic ignorant person. 

I’m not saying everyone should have this in their bio. Or even MOST people. But can we at least get this term cleared up? 
This is supposed to be a safe place for people. For my friends on here. (Who if can tell this is me, keep it movin. Lol def don’t look at my profile. I’ll know by how you look me in the eyes the next day lmao.) 
 

I don’t understand the mix up. What do people on here think it means?

I don't think it is necessarily a question of what people "here" think it means so much as lately there have been a whole bunch of new terms related to gender and sexual identity and sexual orientation which seemed to appear out of nowhere without any authority giving any definitions of them as if we all were fully familiar with these terms and already know what they mean: I know I never got anything in the mail saying "here are a bunch of new terms, this is what they mean"...

Edited May 23, 2022 by thisguy20
corrected a typo

[steve25805 121,099]

I must admit...and this is some admission for anyone on the political left in the UK today as I am...that I don't fully understand the various gender and sexual orientation-related terms that have sprung up over the last decade or two. I can say that under the cloak of anonymity here but if I were to say this on any of the left wing forums I frequent I'd risk being slaughtered. "What!!! How can you not know what Cis means? Are you some sort of crypto-fascist stuck in the 20th century?" Something like that.

Fact is, my philosophy is simple in regards to gender and sexual orientations. It can be summed up in four words. Live and let live. 

Fact is if someone chooses to identify as male or female, and whether or not that be the same gender they were born into, and whether they be gay, bi, or straight is of the utmost unconcern to me. Whatever makes them happy. And they can use whatever terms to describe themselves that they feel happy with.

So I may not be up to speed with all the latest terminology - basically because I have little interest in arguments over such issues though if pressed will always support anyone's right to choose who and what they want to be. Nevertheless, if everyone just accepted everyone else for who they are as I do, we wouldn't need to fight over such labels anyway. And we'd all be happier for it.