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Keeping Personal Life Separate from Fetish/Kink life


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I don't know if its just me, of course I know its not just me. when I started getting into and figuring what I liked or was interested in... I didn't think about it at first but I followed, put out what I liked to my close friends and family not knowing it was an audience that didn't know I liked that type of stuff..

You could only imagine the ridicule, disgust and shame I got from it. It dawned on me that I need to make an alias and its own personal accounts so no one I know personally could know it was me being into what I overall enjoyed. My alias name is Johnathan Dontell, it has its own twitter, insta, tumblr or wherever I get pulled to further enjoy my many fetishes and kinks. it felt better that way once I threw my friends and family off the trail by downplaying the content they saw. I lost friends through judgement and harassment like I was not a human being to them for what I liked. 

Just wondering if anyone has had to make up an alias or keep a second life or have you have overcame the barrier and keep it in your personal life.. 

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I definitely keep my interests on here completely separate from my day to day life, none of my friends and family know about it. I haven't bothered with separate social media but I never share any of those details here anyway, I have got a separate email address that I use for any porn/fetish related stuff.

I live alone and only have a few visitors so it's not hard for me to keep the separation.

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I'm sure I speak for a huge number of members when I say 'absolutely yes'.

I have my alias here GWG and with the exception of probably two people on the forum, my life here is entirely isolated from my daily normal family, work and social life.  I use my alias here and nowhere else - but then for me this is the only site I'm registered and use for 'this interest'. I also have an email address solely associated with this site.

From a browsing perspective, this is all done in private mode so I don't have the web address stored in my browsing history - and I don't browse when there's a chance of being overlooked.

So yes GWG is the real me and I'm also the real me - just with different circles of friends and acquaintances.

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Like others have said, I maintain a separate email for my interests.  Not being on what most people would call social media (facebook, twitter, etc) simplifies thing: of course it simplifies things not just related to my interests, but in general as well.

As far as friends and family, most are aware of my interests to some degree: they know that, as an adult, I have peed my pants on a few occasions; however they would seem to believe these were "didn't make it to the toilet in time" and/or "zipper was stuck" type accidents which I am embarrassed by, but admit did happen.  That doesn't mean that any of them know that I sometimes / frequently choose to pee in my pants; they don't know that I find it to be an enjoyable stress-relief activity.

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I keep my "fetish" interests on this and other sites completely separate from the rest of my life, with an e-mail address, a user name and a google account which I only use in this special-interest world. I even have a separate, password protected user account for this stuff on my pc and my tablet. As far as I know, nobody around me knows of this "parallel universe" in which I spend a few hours almost every day.

However, I would like to emphasize that this separate identity for the fetish world is not a fake identity. What I reveal here about myself is true, it's the "real me", as @gldenwetgoose put it. A different name, but the person behind it is still the same.

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51 minutes ago, kalle2020 said:

However, I would like to emphasize that this separate identity for the fetish world is not a fake identity. What I reveal here about myself is true, it's the "real me", as @gldenwetgoose put it. A different name, but the person behind it is still the same.

indeed - it would actually be a breach of the site rules for any of us to declare ourselves to be someone other than ourselves.  Clearly we don't show the whole picture for reasons of personal choice - but if I were to adopt the persona of a 20 year old girl for example I would have to issue myself a formal warning.

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3 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

indeed - it would actually be a breach of the site rules for any of us to declare ourselves to be someone other than ourselves.  Clearly we don't show the whole picture for reasons of personal choice - but if I were to adopt the persona of a 20 year old girl for example I would have to issue myself a formal warning.

No I am who I am definitely am not trying to be anything I’m not. My gender, age and etc is the same just not my username and I prefer to keep my fetish / kink lifestyle to its own alias is all. My username is my alias and I still sign up as my real identity and etc. Hopefully I didn’t mislead you on that. I don’t think anyone would want those problems 😅. I do appreciate you keeping an eye out on people like that you never know nowadays. 
 

** EDIT my username usually fluctuates between my real middle name due to its uniqueness and my alias name “JDontell” or Johnathan Dontell. 

Edited by tremayl
Needed to a clarification to not confuse anyone
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Yep this sounds like me lol.

On other sites I have a number of username that are all generally the same, but "Bacardi" is my Peefans username and nothing else. There are some (not a lot) details I post about on here that are changed to throw people off of my trail, but its all still generally factual to my life so I dont consider it lying. I'd say if any of my friends of family surveyed all of my posts they'd never be able to guess it was me, and I'd like to keep it that way for my own safety. I'm just a paranoid person. Thats all 😐

I feel like I have to enjoy the site this way because I, too, was shamed when I disclosed my fetish to an ex boyfriend and he kinkshamed me so bad. 

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I dont have a separate email because id be worried I would be discovered using it. To sign up for this site I used a ten minute email lol. 

Don't mean to hijack the thread, but can I create an email just for this and access/manage it only in incognito? Or would I have to go RL or get an app?

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I thought this was pretty much the norm for everyone. I imagine that few people decide not to use a different alias and persona for anything related to porn, fetish stuff, erotica, and the like. The ones who disclose their true identity are generally people who are in the business and are easily identified anyway (through their videos, etc). Even then, the names that they use may not be their real names - just callsigns, which is common.

I, like many others, use a different email for stuff like this (I'm not even sure if I remember the address) and I only browse these sites in incognito mode, even though I don't share a computer with other people and live alone. I do this with anything related to any kind of porn or erotica.

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I actually don’t hide it my wife knows everything about everything and i haven’t been in contact with my family for years. But yeah i mean i keep it on the personal level its not like i tell all my friends right away, if they ask i answer but other than that no. I don’t have any social media and i pretty much only talk to people face to face. I’ve never been bothered if someone found out i was into pee, for me (and i don’t know why) it would be a lot worse if someone found out im genderfluid that is something i’ve only ever told my wife and nobody else. That’s also a reason im so thankful that this site exists because in here sometimes i can be more true to myself than i can IRL. ❤️

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Exactly the same here as most posters above. Although I tend to do this with my entire life anyway, I have separate groups of friends etc so it's not difficult for me.

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10 hours ago, Bacardi said:

Don't mean to hijack the thread, but can I create an email just for this and access/manage it only in incognito? Or would I have to go RL or get an app?

 Yes that should work but you'll have limited functionality, for example with a Gmail account you may not be able to use Drive without accepting cookies, which you probs don't want.

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11 hours ago, Bacardi said:

I dont have a separate email because id be worried I would be discovered using it. To sign up for this site I used a ten minute email lol. 

Don't mean to hijack the thread, but can I create an email just for this and access/manage it only in incognito? Or would I have to go RL or get an app?

I’m confused on what you’re trying to say. Ofc you can make an email for “Bacardi” I made my secondary email so that way I can publicly ( if needed ) open my main email and not have my socials and whatever news or info I sign up for or have mixed in my personal email that I use for business and daily stuff. 

Edited by tremayl
Clarification
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One thing people should be aware of is that other email addresses get connected with your social media and tracked through cookies as well.  So a conversation about pee in your kink email might lead to a spate of ads for incontinence pads on FB, which may be tricky to explain.  Also it's a good idea to use a different service provider from your regular email, an obscure on.  If someone decides to check their email on your device they may see your alias in the list of accounts.

My partner once managed to find some stream of consciousness posts I'd spewed on Usenet.  She was pretty clever, I only made a passing reference to it once and she managed to figure out who I was and where I was posting.  It actually worked out well because she found out that I loved her to bits and my only complaint, which I'd joked about, was her kissing technique. 

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I think everyone's alias is the name that appears on their profile. My name is Peegurl74. I don't express my fetish anywhere else. If there are other social media areas to partake in, I will consider them, but so far, I like this group here. 

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