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Note: This story contains references of 'golden shower' peeing (From a stage into a crowd).  And it contains 'naughty peeing'.

 

FULL BUSH

"Making money is not about playing it safe, it is about taking risks." 

I checked out the little group in front of me as i walked the stage. There was an older women in the group who looked like she might have some money.

 "It is about action, it is about doing!  You are going to make mistakes, you are going to take some loses, but... if you follow the method I map out in this course, you will ultimately make a lot of money.  I guarantee it!"

I spotted a group of four young women with brightly colored hair.  Were they the female punk group 'Full Bush'? 

"Real estate has always been, and still continues to be a great way to make money!" 

The woman with the bright pink hair was listening intently.  If I wasn't wrong she was Full Bush's lead singer 'Pussy'.  

'Full Bush' was a completely out of control group.  And they had been banned from many venues.  There were guys in male punk groups who would piss into the crowd during performances, but 'Full Bush' was the only female group that I had heard of doing the same thing.  And from the videos I'd seen on the internet, 'Pussy' was a true power pisser.

 "You can flip, rent, and even buy tax liens."

"Not here in California!" Pussy blurted out.     

"What?"

"You can't buy tax liens in California." Pussy smirked

"Yes you can." I disagreed.

"No you can't." Pussy snickered and shook her head. "Mike, you need to fucking do your homework!"

"You can buy tax liens in other states." I attempted to maintain my stride.. "I've given this course nationwide, and helped a lot of people make a lot of money!"

The wealthy looking woman got up and headed out followed by a young black couple.

"Wait! Hear me out! Real estate is just one of the moneymaking methods I teach."

"Mike.." A big man stood up. "I heard you served a little time."

"Yeah.. but I made people a lot of money!"

"And you broke a lot of rules to do it."

Sighs went through the audience, and people began filing out of the room.  

"Well.. since you came, you might as well stay for the rest of my presentation." 

"Goodbye Mike." The big man waved a disgusted hand at me.

"Betty, I told you this was a waste of time." I heard 'Boobs' the lead guitarist for 'Full Bush' tell Pussy.  She got up and walked out shaking her head.  "Kat' -- their gold haired keyboard player, and 'Devil' -- their purple haired Japanese drummer, followed.

I exhaled in defeat and looked at 'Pussy' -- Betty -- who remained seated, as literally everyone else left.  "Mike, Mike, Mike.." She got up and headed towards me. "I heard you were better than this…"

"Well I actually made people a lot of money.."

"And you fucking broke every rule in the book." Betty smiled broadly.

Gawd, Betty was actually an incredibly beautiful woman!  If she went back to being a brunette she could be a TOP Sports Illustrated model!

Betty approached me with a smug look on her face.  "I think you know who we are.  We're looking for a manager.  Someone who could get us good gigs, me smooth things over -- if you know what I mean."

"I'm sorry, I've got other plans."

"We studied at Juilliard. We're real musicians.. We're just experimenting, trying to find our grove."

"I'm moving down to Louisiana."

Betty bit her lip in a sexy manner. "I'll show you my tat, if you show me yours." 

"Okay.." I unbuttoned my shirt and showed her the little tattoo on my shoulder.

"A skull with the letters 'AS'?"

"'Atheist Scum'.. There were just a few of us.  All of the other guys were Christians."

"In jail?"

"Yeah.."

Betty studied me. "You're tall, and you've got a lot of muscle.  Did you play football?"

"Yeah I played a little college ball, but I got a bad knee injury my first year.  I got a Bachelor's in Business."

"A business degree." Betty unzipped her jeans. "Here I'll show you my pussy." She pulled her jeans and panties down exposing her raw totally unshaven hairy pussy.

"I thought you were going to show me your tat.."

Betty curled her tongue in a pervy fashion. "Take a closer look."

"Okay.." I got down on my knees. "You want me to give you oral sex?"

Betty parted the thick hair that covered her mound.  Under the hair was a tattoo of a fluffy little kitten. "My pussy." She smirked. "You like it?"

"Yeah, it's cute."

"Mike, have you ever felt like just pulling your cock out and fucking pissing right on the floor?" Betty squatted and grinned in my face.

"Well…" I watched in amazement as Betty peed powerfully on the carpet right in front of me. I burst out laughing, "Betty, you are so rude!"

"So, what do you plan to do down in Louisiana, Mike? Betty asked casually as she wiped herself with a tissue.

"Well.. there's this great big church, on a great big piece of property.  It's got a huge parking lot, and even a small mansion on the property.  An investment group bought it.  They're going to tear everything down and put a Mall on the property. But, it's going to take at least a year or two to get the permits and the funding to get started.  And the city is putting pressure on them to find tenants to keep people from selling drugs in the parking lot, and squatting in the buildings.  So I can lease it for next to nothing."

Betty looked at me in disbelief. "Mike, you're going to become a Christian pastor?"

"Yeah, I've heard it's a fun, easy, way to make a lot of money."

"Are you looking for a band?"

 

Edited by 1badboy
I forgot the summary at the beginning
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"Bob Wheeler.." I introduced myself, "..I'm Mike Prescott, and this is my wife Betty.  It's great that you could come over and show us around the church!"

"No problem Pastor Mike." Bob smiled. "I needed to get you the keys anyway."  He unlocked the huge front doors, and led the way through the foyer into the chapel.

Betty gasped. "Wow Mike, this place is huge!" 

It looked a bit like a medieval Catholic cathedral with it's vaulted ceiling and the huge arched stained glass windows that lined the sides. 

"What's the cost of the monthly upkeep?" Betty whispered.

"I don't know.." I looked at the dusty carpet and pews.  We were going to need to get things cleaned before our first service. "I read that it costs about seventeen hundred dollars per member to run a church for a year -- but we can let some of the maintenance slide."

"Pastor Mike, you have a question?" Bob asked. 

"Yeah, how many people does this church seat?"

"Oh, about a thousand.  If you hold two services you could serve around two thousand people."

"So our operating expenses will be around three million?!" Betty looked at me in disbelief

Bob laughed, "It costs a bit of money to run a church this size, but you won't be starting out with a full staff." He looked at me. "There's a guy named Chris who has a cleaning business.  He's  been coming around here asking about work.. I recommend you steer clear of him." He shook his head. "Let's just say Chris is no Christian."

"Wow, that's a big organ!" Betty changed the subject.  The organ sat to the right of the stage.  It's wall of pipes stretched almost all the way to the ceiling.

Bob watched Betty hustle down the aisle to the organ. "Pastor Mike, where are you from?"

"Ann Arbor, Michigan." I answered honestly.

"A lot of atheists and liberals up there?" Bob asked. "I think you'll find us a bit more Conservative.  But Christianity is still under attack -- even down here." 

Bob took a breath. "If you don't mind I'd like to give you a little inside advice...  You need to be on guard for Christian posers." He folded his arms. "There are older guys like Chris, who come around just to pick up on the young women.  I say put an age limit on the adult groups.  Let them date the divorcees with the kids. If they've missed out..  well.. it's their own fault!"

"Yeah.." I watched Betty as she played with the organ.  Gawd she was beautiful with her natural brown hair.   Pretty soon I would be one of the old single guys Bob was talking about…. How long would we actually continue this scam?  Would we really call it quits when our one year lease ran out?

"Wow Pastor Mike,  Betty is quite a musician!"

"Yeah, she studied at Juilliard."

"Juilliard?"

"It's a university in New York.."

Bob nodded, "Pastor Mike, maybe I should just let you guys check out this place on your own.  These are the church keys, and these are the keys to the house.". He handed me two huge rings.  "You'll just have to experiment to see what goes to what."

"Thanks again for letting us in Bob, we'll see you around."

I walked down to Betty.  She was playing gospel sounding music.  I never would have guessed that she knew music iike that.

Betty finished the song and turned to me."What was that all about?"

"I don't know." I snickered. "He wants us to keep the older single guys away from the younger single women."

"Is that a problem around here?" Betty softly rubbed my thigh.

"I don't know.."

"Older single guys have money." Betty moved her hand to my crotch. "Want to hold a singles dinner?  For people twenty-one and over? No age limit!"

"We could, I've got some money stashed away. Ohh.." I was starting to enjoy Betty's groping.

"Barbecue is popular down here." Betty stood up and set her hand softly on my chest. "How about ribs? We could hire a caterer."

"Yeah, but aren't ribs a little messy?"

Betty slid her hand down onto my crotch. "People won't care if they're drunk.  We could have Racheal, Heidi, and Mayumi serve beer." She began softly caressing me.  "And we could be the speakers and bouncers." 

"What should we charge? Forty bucks?"

Betty nodded, "People will pay it." She kissed me tenderly on the cheek and began humping my leg. "Fuck me Mike.  Fuck me!"

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57 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Just a quick point...   Please can you check out the following:

You hopefully will have the 'edit' option at the bottom of the first post to be able to add the summary.

Thanks,

Thank you, I forgot to include that.

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Racheal stood in the middle of our living room and unfastened the oversized buckle on her belt. "Any food left for me?" 

"You're a little late but we've got plenty of food." It was a bit of a relief to see both Heidi and Rachael back. "The dining room is through that door."

"Wait, I've gotta water the carpet first." Rachael flashed me a pervy grin, pulled her jeans down and squatted. She made no attempt to hide her raw hairy pussy, and I got a good view as she peed powerfully on our dark red carpet.

"Rachael, how did last night go?" Betty stepped up next to me and set a hand softly on my shoulder.

Rachael giggled, "Jim was so shy!" She wiped herself with a tissue and dropped it on the carpet. "It was like he was afraid to touch me. Finally I just attacked him!"

I glanced at Racheal's pussy as she stood to zip back up, and Betty, dressed only in a robe, began humping my leg.

Heidi squealed with laughter from the dining room. "Sounds like Buck!" 

"What was Buck like?" Racheal hurried eagerly into the dining room.

"I think he was a virgin!" Heidi giggled. He was so nervous! He came in like thirty seconds... but he got the hang of it! He fucked me like eight times last night. Gawd he has a big cock!"

"Jim's not bad himself." Racheal smiled smugly, "He was on me all night, and even gave me a quicky this morning."

Betty followed me into the kitchen. I got the last waffle, and the last of the bacon, and eggs for Racheal. "Fuck me Mike, fuck me!"

"Honey...let's serve our guests first.". I carried the food out to Racheal.

"Where's Mayumi?" Racheal looked around.

"She's in the gym." Betty pressed her body against my backside and set a hand on my crotch. "The old pastor was a bit of a bodybuilder."

"Racheal, I think my wife wants me to get back into shape."

"That's married life!" Heidi giggled.

"Yeah, I've got him by the balls.." Betty gave my crotch a gentle squeeze.

"Honey…" I protested. "..why don't we go check on Mayumi?"

"Yeah, she might need her diaper changed." Heidi laughed.

 

 

We found Mayumi running on the treadmill. She was dressed in short "Eighties style" pink shorts, and a white t-shirt. I noticed a wad of tissue and a wet spot on the low orange carpet next to the bench press.

"Mayumi, how much money did we make last night?"

Mayumi stepped off of the treadmill. "I don't know.. over ten grand."

"What would it cost to cater breakfast for around a thousand people?"

"A lot!" Mayumi laughed. "How am I supposed to know?!"

"I don't know.. Betty, what do you say we hold a free pancake breakfast after the service tomorrow?"

"Would the caterers have enough time to get ready?" Betty asked.

"If I called soon they would have all of today."

Betty frowned "Wouldn't that mainly attract poor people?" 

I turned my back to Mayumi and casually unzipped my jean. "Who cares, I want to fill the chapel." I pulled my slightly hard cock out and took aim at a small plastic waste bin. I really needed to go and my stream went right in without a drop on the carpet.

Betty giggled, "Let me help you!" She took hold of my cock and redirected my stream onto the carpet.

Mayumi stepped around me and grinned madly.

"Mayumi, what did you find out about Chris?" I asked as nonchalantly as I could manage.

Mayumi's eyes twinkled with amusement. "He has a girlfriend, but I don't think it's going to last." She smiled, "Her father is this ultra-conservative Christian realtor guy -- and he doesn't approve of Chris."

 

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I walked around the chapel with a plastic bag, and the type of mechanical stick designed for picking up trash, and picked up little wads of tissue. The pee stains weren't particularly visible, and I didn't find much tissue, but Chris and his team would be coming in later in the day to thoroughly clean the chapel.

Betty quietly walked down the aisle and over to me. She unzipped her stretchy form fitting jeans, and pulled them down along with her lacy pink panties. "Mike.." She sat her bare rear down on the edge of one of the cinema style seats, "..my step-father is a pastor." She smirked as a thick stream of pee jetted from her hairy pussy and splashed loudy on the low blue carpet. "Christians say things like; 'In order to really know our savior, we must open ourselves to him with a pure heart. We must be aware and constantly give proper thanks for the countless blessings he bestows upon our hearts in our daily walks.'"

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Whatever you want it to!" Betty laughed. She wiped her pussy with a tissue. "Ninty-five percent of Christianity is just gibberish." She tossed the tissue into the plastic bag I held.

"You want me to preach that way?"

"No.." Betty sighed, "..but the sorts of stuff you preached at the singles dinner are dangerous." She pulled her jeans up. "My step-father was a very controlling little mini-god.  He caught me pissing in the chapel once.. He got SO angry!" Her eyes clouded. "Mike... are you like that? An over-controlling ultra-conservative Christian asshole?"

I unzipped my jeans. "No.." I pulled my cock out, aimed it at the cloth back of the chair in front of me, and released a powerful stream. "I'm more like Billy Lee, in that movie "Bad Times at the El Royale". I'm more of the evil charismatic cult leader type." I watched as my pee ran down the back of the chair.

Betty smiled faintly. "You've got the body and the looks, but your hair is too short."

"I had long hair in High School."

"I'll bet the girls were all over you." Betty wrapped her hand around my cock.

"No… I was too busy. I had to work in the evenings. My father drank too much.. He died my senior year."

 

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Light chatter floated through the crowd as the little over half full church waited anxiously for the service to begin.

Betty messed with a microphone on the stage, and suddenly Heidi began playing what sounded like the Eurythmics song "Sweet dreams are made of these", on the huge church organ.  Racheal joined in on the electric guitar, and Mayumi accompanied on the drums. 

Betty took the microphone,. "Sweet dreams are made of these..". Her Annie Lennox imitation was spot on!

The crowd erupted in applause.

It was an unusual choice for a Sunday church service, but at the end of the song the congregation gave Betty a standing ovation.

 I Iot up and introduced Betty, and myself -- then I introduced Rachael, Heidi, and Mayumi.   I wasn't really comfortable standing behind a podium, so I just walked the stage with my headset.

"This is our first service so I thought it might not be a bad idea to start with the book of Matthew chapter one."   

I read through chapter one.  It started out with genealogy that traced Mary's lineage all the way back to Abraham.  Then it told the story of Jesus' birth..

"Now it says that Joseph was betrothed to Mary.  In the old Jewish tradition there were two steps to marriage.  The first step was called 'Kiddushin', and the second step was called 'Nisuin'.  'Kiddushin' was what Matthew was referring to.

Kiddushin' was much more serious than an engagement.  Rings were exchanged, vows were taken, and papers were signed.  The couple were actually rendered husband and wife.  Generally they would not live together during this period, but if they did, or if they had sexual intercourse -- the marriage was considered consumated.  However is was illegal to initiate  a Kiddushin' by merely having sex.

So Joseph and Mary actually WERE officially married.  And Joseph would have had to have gotten a divorce, to separate, since they were already living together and Mary was pregnant.

Now some people argue that it's hard to believe that Joseph and Mary weren't already having sex -- since there would have been no reason not to.  And it seems that Matthew is trying to use this to make the argument for a virgin birth.." 

Betty looked at me with wide eyes.

"...but whatever the case Jesus was no ordinary man.  

We read that an angel came to Joseph in a dream and told him that Mary was going to give birth to a savior -- and Joseph did the right thing!  He stayed with Mary, and he raised Jesus!

It would have been awfully hard on Mary had Joseph divorced her -- but he didn't.  Joseph manned up and did the right thing!"

Betty flashed me a horrified look, and I noticed whole families getting up and leaving the chapel 

I turned off my headset as Betty approached me.  It might have been an awkward transition but I didn't want the audience to hear Betty.

"What the fuck?!" Betty whispered loudly, "You just destroyed the virgin birth of Jesus!  It is supposed to be about Jesus being born to a virgin -- not Joseph being a good father!"

"Too late now.."

Betty headed over to the microphone. "Now please stand and join us for 'One Love'." She pushed a button on a remote and the words were projected on the wall above the alter.

A large number of people left as Betty sung the ragae style song.  I suspected many were simply headed out to the breakfast set up on the back patio, and lawn.

I took the stage after Betty finished the song. "I hope everyone our service.  Please join us on the back patio for breakfast -- which is absolutely free." Betty and i headed down the aisle to the huge front doors and took position  on either side to shake hands with people as they exited the building.  

Some people smiled and shook my hand warmly, other frowned and did not shake my hand at all.  An old lady told me that my sermon about the birth of Christ was the most unusual that she had ever heard, but she did not appear upset.  

"Uh oh here he comes.." I said to Betty as the bearded man with the kids approached.  He had waited until the last few people had left.

"Pastor Mike, I want to have a word with you!" 

"Sure.."

"How can you discuss divorce, and sex so freely?! There are young women, and children in this congregation!!"

Betty sighed, "Sir, remember what Jesus said? 'Let the children come, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'  Children weren't excluded."

"What?"

"Betty's father is a pastor." I explained.

"Yeah.. so?!" Brett glared menacingly at Betty.

"Woah!" Buck stepped in between.  "Brett, you need to calm down.  You're blowing things out of proportion."

"Officer Thompson.." Brett backed up slightly.

"Brett, go and get your kids something to eat."

Brett sighed loudly, "I'm just trying to teach my kids good values.."

'Pastor, do we get maple syrup on our pancakes?  And bacon, and sausage?!" Brett's oldest boy asked excitedly.

"You bet! Real maple syrup, and fruit and berries too, and eggs, and hash browns!"

"Please daddy!  Please please!" The little boy begged. 

"Okay.." Brett gave in.  "Let's go and get something to eat."  He turned back to me.  "Pastor, just keep in mind that my kids attend your church." 

Buck followed Brett outside.

Rachael stopped Heidi, "Buck's a police officer?!" 

"Yeah!" Heidi grinned.

"I thought he was a carpenter or something."

"He was.  He built his own house." Heidi chased after Buck.

"I'm just a mechanic.." Jim said sheepishly. 

Rachael snuggled up with him. "Jim owns his own shop." 

"You guys are taking the best men." Betty laughed.

"The best?" Jim snickered. "I haven't been to a church in years… and Bucks even worse than me."

"Com'on Jim!" Rachael tugged at his arm.  "Let's go and get something to eat." 

Betty watched them leave. "Mike, the parking lot is filling up.  People are coming to the breakfast that didn't come to the service."

I grinned. "Betty,  they're coming HERE! And the 'service' isn't really over yet." 

"Mike, how much did this all cost?"

"Don't worry about it, I've got money socked away."

"See Betty, I told you." Mayumi squatted next to the wall and played with her phone as it charged.  She rose and I noticed a large wet spot on the carpet.

Edited by 1badboy
To correct a few mistakes
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"Honey.." I pulled Betty close and gave her a kiss on the cheek.  She didn't resist me.  

"Mmm honey.." Betty wrapped her arms around me and kissed me passionately on the lips. "Mike, you look surprised." She laughed. "Do I remind you of your old girlfriend?"

"No.. she didn't believe in public displays of affection."

Betty ran her fingers through my hair. "She was cheating on you?"

"Yeah.. "

"Mike.." Betty kissed me on the lips again. ".. I'm going to take a piss, then let's go and get something to eat." She headed down into the seating area.

"You guys are dangerous.."

Betty stuck her tongue out at me and squatted.

 

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The sheer number of people outside caught me by surprise.  This was not like my investment groups picnics.  We might have had a couple hundred people -- this was pushing a thousand or more.  The queues  to the buffet stations were incredibly long. 

"Mike, it feels like we're at a festival." Betty whispered.

"I know.. "

"Pastor Mike!" A tall slim man shook my hand. "I'm Greg Sims! You look like you've played ball."

"A little.. but I got a knee injury that kept me from going very far with it."

"Yeah,  well you see that tall kid way over there?" Greg pointed to a tall skinny kid holding a football. "That's my boy, Chuck.  Chuck's first string Q.B. at Lincoln High!"  

Chuck wrapped his hand around the back of the football, wound up, and bombed the ball in my direction.

"Woah!" I glanced around to make sure I wasn't running into anyone and caught the football. "Wow, Chuck has a good arm." I handed the ball to Greg. "But we probably shouldn't throw the ball so close to the people."

"You think Chuck has potential?" Greg smiled with pride.

"Sure, he's got the height, and the arm." I noticed a young girl with pink hair watching Chuck intensely.  She stood close to Heidi, Buck, Rachael, and Jim, who sat eating on the edge of the stage.

"Chuck's just a sophmore." Greg smiled with pride.

"And he's already playing first string varsity.  That's pretty good!  Hey, good luck, it sounds like he's got real potential!" I chased after Betty who was already headed towards the stage.  Was she thinking the same thing as me?  Did the girl with pink hair recognize Heidi, and Rachael?  Did she recognize the band?"

Betty made a beeline to the girl. "Hi, I'm Pastor Mike's wife Betty!"

"Hi.. I'm Kristen." She blushed slightly.  She was one of those light skinned blonde's with rosy cheeks.

"Hi!" I shook her hand a little firmer than I had intended.

"Kristin, is there something you'd like to ask us?" Betty ventured.

"Well.. I was just wondering if you are going to have a youth group?"

Betty's face tensed, "No, I'm sorry I don't think so."

"We won't?" I asked.

Betty made a face. "Mike, you want to go on mission trips?" 

"No, not really.. but why are you opposed to it?"

"My step-father was a youth pastor when he had the affair with my mom!" Betty whispered loudly. "You can continue you're singles group but no youth group, no young adults.  We don't need that shit.  No more Pastors!"

The look on Kristin's face told me she had overheard us.

"My parents are divorced too.." Kristin said weakly.  "My dad is a salesman and he travels a lot.  My mom cheated on him… then she divorced him.."

Betty snickered, "It's always the woman's fault."

"I don't know about that." I disagreed. "My mom probably wouldn't have divorced my dad if he hadn't been drinking so much.."

"Mike..shh!" Betty put a finger to her lips, "We shouldn't be talking about our personal lives here "

"Pastor Mike, are you still close with your parents?" Kristin ignored Betty.

I looked at Betty, then back at Kristin. "My dad drank himself to death when I was in High School...... and my idiot step-father got into a bad accident shortly after I graduated from college.  My mom was killed."

"Woah.." Kristin looked down at the ground. 

Betty hugged me before Kristin could. "What is this Mike, a fucking pity contest?"

"I don't know.. watch your language."

Betty rolled her eyes,"Mike, I'll give the prayer then let's get something to eat." 

 

-------

 

"So Kristin do play any instruments?" Betty asked as we waited in line.

"Just the piano." Kristin almost whispered. "But I really like music… I think I want to major in it."

"You're a Sophmore?"

"I'm a Senior."

"Any particular University picked out?"

"I don't know.. We don't have much money."

"Rachael, and Mayumi, got scholarships, maybe they could help you apply for one."

Kristin nodded. "Pastor Mike.." She looked at me. "I need a job." 

"We'll hire you." Betty answered for me. "Relax Mike.." She whispered to me. "..I'm not going to make her cut her hair."

 

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Betty and girls entertained the crowd with mellow versions of popular music.  Then Rachael and Mayumi surprised even me with an incredible performance of 'Dueling Banjos' -- from the movie "Deliverance" -- to overwhelming applause.

It was like an enormous picnic.  Families threw frisbees.  Greg and his son threw the football. And groups of guys played pickup basketball on the churches outdoor basketball courts.

"Pastor Mike!" a tall but slightly overweight man strode over to the table where Betty, and I sat across from Kristin.  "How ya'all doin'? I'm Joey Williams." He extended a hand to me.

"Good to meet you Joey." I shook his hand.

Betty shook his hand too. "Joey, are all those kids yours?" She pointed at the table he had just come from., "You've got a big family!"

"Yes we do." Joey smiled.  "Four boys, and three girls!". He raised an eyebrow, "You know how it is.  When you're single you think that if you were married you'd have sex six times a day.  And then you get married -- and really do it... The next thing you know you've got more kids than you know what to do with!"

"Joey, what are you up to?"

Joey laughed, "Just checking you out Pastor..  Seriously I love being a father and having a big family." He became a little more serious. "I like that you don't shy away from the subject of sex and family.  You remind me a bit of Pastor Rick.  He was a good guy.  He had two sons and a daughter… Maybe you'll have a couple of kids soon."

Betty stuck her tongue out at Joey. "We're working on it."

"Right on!" Joey grinned broadly. "See you around." He turned to leave then turned back to us. "We need more Christians like you two."

"Were Pastor Rick's children too young to take over the church?". Betty asked.

"No.." I sighed, "..but I heard he died of a drug overdose."

Kristin shook her head. "Pastor Rick was a real nice guy.  He didn't take drugs.  Somebody killed him." 


 

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"Well that was fun, but exhausting." I closed the front door behind us.

"Help me unzip my dress." Betty said impatiently.

"Sure." 

Betty pulled her dress off her shoulders and let it drop on the floor of our entryway.  "There sure are a lot of big poor families down here." She yanked her panties and kicked them off.

"Yeah, they're probably not so welcome at the other churches." I followed bottomless Betty into the greatroom.

"My step-father would have run them off." Betty sat down on the arm of a couch, and spread her legs.  A thick stream off pee jetted from her raw hairy pussy.

I laughed, "Betty, that is so gross!"

"I'm gross!" Betty leaned back and sent a stream of pee a good ten feet across the room into the side of a grey cloth recliner. "Did you see Heidi, and Mayumi, trying to pee onstage without being noticed?"

"No.. did they really do that?!"

Betty nodded.  "They are like magicians, they can pee anywhere without getting caught." She took off her bra and exposed her huge erect nipples. "Mike.. I need your big cock in my pussy."  She spread her bushy pubic hair with her fingers so I could see her tattoo.

 

------------

 

"Wow, I can't believe how much Saint Joe is growing!" Betty peered out the window of my Subaru Crosstrek at the skyscrapers under construction in the distance.

"Yeah, it's impressive. Twenty years ago it was just a little town, just a blank slate on the Mississippi Delta.  Then big businesses from California started relocating here." 

We passed the huge 'Rivian' parking lot, and mega-factory.

"Is that a lighthouse?" Betty pointed down the road.

"No, it's a church.  A big one.  Religion is big business down here."

We approached the full sized 'lighthouse' next to the church's entrance. "We've got competition!" Betty laughed.  "That church is huge!"
 

HOOONK! A white Ford F-350 went careening around us.  It continued right through a red light.  Cars skidded to stops from both directions.

"What the hell?!" I gasped, "That was close!" I watched the overweight middle-aged man in the pickup truck pull into the church parking lot. "What a hot head!"

Betty shook her head. "Super ambitious like my step-father. But my step-fathers church is less than half the size of ours.  The churches down here are on another level."

"Yeah…"

"Isn't that the virgin Christian football player guy?" Betty pointed at a billboard.

"Yeah, you think he's gay?"

"No, I think he's full of shit!"

"What are you talking about, these Christian guys don't even masterbate!"

"Yeah right!" Betty snickered. "Do you?"

"What?"

"Do you still masterbate?"

"Yeah.."

"Stop! Just use me whenever you get the urge!" Betty unzipped her jeans.

"For real?"

"Yeah." Betty pulled her jeans down and smirked.  "I dare you!" She scooted to the edge of the seat.

I felt myself growing hard as her pee splashed noisily on the carpet of my car. 

 

 

Edited by 1badboy
Caught some mistakes
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We ate on the outdoor patio of a small New Orleans style restaurant. .  

"You really want to hold another free breakfast next weekend?" Betty took a bite of her blackened catfish.

"Yeah.." I paused to eat some seafood gumbo. The cajun food was one of the things I had really enjoyed when I had visited Saint Joe in the past with my investment group. "You know how these things work. A lot of people will shy away the first time, but they will come if you give them a second opportunity."

"Okay, but we're going to work poor Chris and his crew to death cleaning up after these things."

I shrugged, "We're giving them work, and we're paying them well. But I feel a little guilty about Mayumi staying and helping so much. I think we could give her a job in the church as a secretary."

Betty nodded, "Let's keep the church simple. We don't need the ammount of staff that most churches have." She sighed, "My mom and my step-dad were always gone…. always on 'vacation'... They had to have assistant Pastor's who could cover. Like the Youth Pastor, or the Young Adults Pastor…. They went everywhere, Hawaii, Bora Bora, Costa Rica, Europe… you name it. It was probably one of the reasons my mom had the affair. Like that would really make her happy....

My dad.." Betty's voice shook, "My dad had cancer! Maybe my mom was just trying to deal with it…"

"He died?"

Betty nodded. "My dad was a music teacher at the High School. We weren't poor, but we weren't rich either.. But we were happy and I had a lot of friends. I was a really good student. My dad said I was really smart..  

I miss my dad.. My step-brother and sister were older than me..." She exhaled, "They were psychos.."

"Jesus forgives!"

"What?" 

An overweight man approached our table with his arms folded. He was dressed in good quality grey slacks, and a white button down shirt. He was clean cut, and his blond hair was perfectly combed. His face flushed red.

"Jesus forgives!" 

 

-----------

 

I was outside the church with Betty, and Chris, while Heidi jammed on the organ inside. Chris's team pressure was washing the building, 

BRRRING! My phone rang with the classic old ring tone.

"Hello?"

"Hello Mike, this is Ben Waller. I was called by a Pastor Martin, from'The Beacon', and a Pastor Donald, from 'New Covanant'. They wanted to know all of the details about you and the lease. I told them the lease was only for a year, and I didn't know a great deal about you. I told them to call me if there was any problem."

Really? I haven't met either of them, but there is quite a Christian culture down here."

"Mike, what are you doing?"

"I don't know… Nothing too crazy or wild."

"Mike I don't know what you went through in prison but this is not the way to deal with it. Religion is a very big deal to these people. You're really asking for it!" Ben hung up on me abruptly.

"Who was that?" Betty frowned.

"Just the guy renting us the church. He said Pastor Martin, and Pastor Donald called him and asked about our lease."

Betty snickered, "Wow, we've already got their attention!" She looked at the empty parking lot and then back at me. "Mike.." Betty tugged at my arm. "There's something we need to talk about."

"Okay.." I followed Betty back to the house, and into the great room.

Betty stood looking anxious as I unbuttoned her blouse and lifted her bra. "What's up?" I sucked on a nipple and rubbed her between the legs.

"A number of women have called the office…" Betty unfastened her jeans and squatted.

Her eyes showed a mixture of fear and determination as she peed noisily on the carpet. "They want me to talk to their daughters about.." She grabbed a tissue from the coffee table and wiped her dripping pussy, "..sex." She let her jeans fall as she stood.

"You wanna do it?" I undid the last few buttons on her blouse.

"No not really.." Betty pulled her blouse off, and unhooked her bra, "..not to just the women." She unfastened my jeans and slid her hand inside my underwear.

"Betty, what do Christians talk about in sex talks?"

"Mike, you haven't heard the talks?" Betty began playing with my cock and balls. "If they're talking to women they say, 'No sexy dressing! No trashy romance novels! No boyfriends in your bedroom!' They tell them that they need to be sexual pure before marriage." 

Betty let go of my cock and headed into the dining room. "And they tell the men.." She climbed up on the table, leaned back, and spread her legs. "They tell the men, 'No porn! No masterbation!' And they maybe talk to them about victims of the sex trade -- it's all bullshit!"

"What are we supposed to talk about?" I played the tip of my cock on her pussy, and began pumping as I slid inside.

"This!" Betty gasped as I took a hold of her breasts and started pumping so deeply that my balls slapped against her. "Mmm.. Mmm.. Let's talk.. about sexual intercourse.. between a man and a woman…. Sex... birth control….children!"

"Okay.. Mmm.. Yeah let's fucking call their bluff. Ahh..Ahh.. Let's break the rules. Umm.. Umm.. Let's make it an open discussion.. Umm.. Umm.. open to anyone.. Umm.. eighteen and older...Ahhh!!" 

 

--------

 

We scheduled the "Sex" discussion and dinner for Wednesday. We only advertised on the churches electronic billboard, but we included a phone number -- to 'reserve' a space. Hopefully the short notice would keep us from being overwhelmed.

By the time Tuesday rolled around we had almost four hundred people signed up. I gave the caterers a rough estimate of five hundred people…

I was more than a little anxious Wednesday afternoon when I adjusted my headset and took the stage -- with Betty at my side.

"Good afternoon everyone!" I quieted the chatter of a crowd that half filled the chapel. "Tonight we will be discussing the topic of sex.

What is sex? Is it masterbation? Is it porn? Is it sexy dressing? Is it a trashy romance novel?" I paused for effect.

"It's all those things!" A guy in the audience yelled out."

"No, it really isn't." I disagreed. "Can somebody tell us what sex is?"

A curvy little brunette in the front of the audience raised her hand. She wore tight cutoff jeans, and sat in the lap of a guy wearing a red plaid shirt with the sleeves torn off.

Mayumi carried a microphone down to her..

"Hi I'm Misty! Sex.." Misty giggled madly, "..is when your boyfriend rams his big hard cock into your tight dripping wet pussy and fucks you so hard you scream with pleasure and pain!"

"Oh come on this is disgusting!" A man cried out.

I ignored the man. "Thank you Misty for that rather.. explicit description. You are right, that is sex. A lot of people shy away from the subject and focus on things like porn, masterbation, and sexy dressing -- but we're not going to do that.

Now there are a number of references to fornication -- living together out of wedlock -- in the New Testament. The Greek word was 'porneia'. However, it was not something that was strongly emphasized in the Torah, or even the New Testament.

The book of Leviticus forbids sex with your mother, your sister, a close relative… However that's kind of common sense.

But that is not to say that the Bible is totally silent on the subject of sexual morality. To understand the Jewish viewppint on sexual morality we need to consider their old two part Jewish marriage.  

Sex was allowed during the first part of the marriage, which we might call the betrothal. That might be surprising to a lot of people, but a betrothal is much more than an engagement. So while they weren't advocating total promiscuity sex prior to marriage wasn't necessarily considered immoral.

So why is sex such a big deal? What is it about sex that makes it so unique?"

"It's very intimate!" A guy cried out from the audience.

"Yeah, but that's not what I'm getting at." I paused. "Sex is the act that creates a new human life!

The two part Jewish marriage gave the couple the chance to back out. But only if she didn't get pregnant first. Once they had a child they were COMMITTED, and that commitment needed to be a strong one!

The Jewish marriage was clearly designed to protect the children -- the family. It was designed to strengthen the commitment and reduce the number of divorces.  

None of the Ten Commandments have anything to do with premarital sex, but the act of adultery is a major sin.

In the Book of Matthew Jesus preached that any divorce -- except the breakup of a fornication -- followed by remarriage, was adultery."

"Jesus did not preach that!" A middle aged man in the front row stood up.

"Yes he did." I countered, "Fornication was not considered a big sin by Jesus -- but divorce and remmariage were. And I would venture a guess that it had to do with kids."

"Jesus preached that a divorce was adultery unless there was sexual immorality!" The middle aged man yelled.

"The Greek word used is 'porneía'. It means sex between unmarried people. I think the version you're referring to is a mistranslation."

"Porneia means adultery in the bible!!" The middle aged man argued. "It refers to sex with someone other than your spouse.

"Why wouldn't he just use the word for adultery? That verse uses the word 'porneia' -- which means fornication, and the word 'moicheía' -- for adultery. Why use two different words?"

"You mother fucking asshole!" The middle aged man flushed, "It's just the way they used it! Do you know what it means to be a Christian? Do you even have kids?"

"Woah! Woah! Woah!" Joey Williams came running down the aisle to the edge of the stage. "Mike, could I help out here?"

"Sure.."

Mayumi handed Joey one of the microphones she was holding and he joined us onstage.

"Look, we could argue this all day. I think we're getting away from the point Mike was trying to make."

"Pastor Mike, needs to be more sensitive to the divorcees!" The middle aged man yelled angrily.

"No I don't" I disagreed. "This talk isn't about justifying divorce." The audience responded with a mixture of cheers and boos.  

"Fuck you!" The man stormed for the aisle. I was relieved to see him go even though fifty or so people followed him out.

"Please.." Joey exhaled, "I'd like to have a few words. My name is Joey Williams. I am married, and I have seven kids so I think I am qualified to speak on the matter of sex.

Now, I'm going to stick my neck out here and say that divorce -- regardless of the cause -- is not a good thing when children are involved. If you don't have kids it's not really that big of a deal -- you can both move on. But if you have kids they are the ones who pay the price. Now some people may disagree about this on religious grounds but I think we need to discuss marriage and children.

I don't think you become a man when you have sex. I think you become a man when you have kids -- and assume the responsibilities of a father, and a husband.

I'm a man so I'm arguing this from a man's point of view. " Joey smiled self-consciously.

"Look," Joey sighed, "Your kids are totally dependant on you. They need a mother and a father. It's important to make a commitment! The stability of the marriage is very important for the well being of the family."

A guy in the front row raised his hand and Mayumi ran to him with a microphone. "What if you just want to sow some wild oats before getting too serious with anybody?" 

Joey grinned, "I'm almost fifty years old. Time passes fast. If you're gonna fool around at least do it with someone you would consider marrying and having kids with. Why waste your time with somebody else? You're not going to live forever, and things only get tougher as you get older. I've got single friends who were popular with the women when they were young, but can barely find a date now."

A woman a couple of rows back raised her hand and Mayumi ran to her "What about concentrating on a career first?"

Joey shrugged. "You can do that if you want to. But since you're here I would guess that you're nterested in a relationship with with a man. I would still recommend that you don't waste your time with guys you wouldn't want to marry and have kids with -- even if kids aren't part of the plan.

When it comes to sexual morality it's really all about monogamy. It's about your spouse and your kids. Adultery is bad because it breaks up a family.

Being a father is about being a man. It's about standing up for your wife, and standing up for your kids. 

I can tell you that marriage isn't perfect.." Joey grinned, ".. but I've got seven kids so could say I'm a well satisfied man. I'm a contractor, and I've done okay, and the money I've made from am investment group has been nice, but at the end of the day.. At the end of the day it is really nice to come home to my children and the woman I love. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Not for more money, not for more freedom, not for anything. I suppose that's all I have to say." Joey handed me the microphone.

"Thank you Joey. That's about it. I don't really have anything to add...Outside on the back patio we have baby-back ribs, beer -- for those who are twenty-one and older, live music, and dancing."

The guy in the red plaid shirt with the torn off sleeves stood up and started clapping. Then the rest of the audience joined in. The applause was deafening.

"Thanks again Joey." I took off my headset and shook his hand. "You're welcome to join us for dinner."

Joey nodded, "I'd stay but I've gotta get home." He looked at both of us and laughed, "Ben's right, You guys are totally crazy."

"Who's Ben?" Betty watched Joey leave.

"The guy who's leasing us the church.."

"How much do you think Joey know about us?"

"Everything.."

Betty walked away without saying anything.

"Pastor Mike!" An old black lady stopped me as I started to chase after Betty. "I like your style. You remind me of Pastor Rick. I really liked his sermons."

"I did too." I agreed.

 

-----------

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I sprinkled my grillades and grits with a little hot sauce as a large boat passed by on the river. "We used to come down here for vacations when I was little. That was when my parents were getting along. My dad was a get rich quick guru. There were periods where he did really well and made people all sorts of money, and periods where things didn't go so well.."

Betty glanced back at the people inside the restaurant. "Marriage isn't easy."

"It has its ups and downs.. Betty?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you using birth-control?"

Betty gave me a big sigh, "Mike you shouldn't get involved with somebody you wouldn't want to have kids with."

"Who says I don't.. Are you? Are you on the pill?"

"No.." Betty smirked, "..and I missed my period."

"Are we going to screw things up like our parents?"

"I hope not.." Betty took a sip of coffee. "..but you need to be more honest and open with me."

I nodded, "Fair enough." 

"Okay Mike how are you connected with the investment group that owns the church?"

I watched some people in a small motorboat as they headed up the river. "I used to run the group. I'm the main owner of the church. It was one of my last big investments before I got into trouble for some insider trading, and a few other things.."

 

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I walked into the dead silent chapel and sat down in a seat.  The place was immaculate. Chris and his crew had done a good job of cleaning.  It felt so weird that I was working on a sermon.  Maybe it would have been easier if I actually believed in God.  

Was I being a bit of a hypocrite?  I had preached about marriage and children while I pretended to be married.  Was I fucking up Betty's life while I continued to fuck up my own?  What was I really trying to fucking prove?

I got up and wandered back to the house.  Betty, and Heidi, were outside washing their cars.

"Mike!" Mayumi greeted me inside.  "I mean PASTOR Mike." She was drinking one of our beers. "Poor Chris.."  She grinned broadly.  "Sara broke up with him.". She tossed the bottle into a waste basket where it clanged with other bottles. "I think I might have to sleep with him!" 

"Are you asking me for advice?  I'm not sure I really know what the hell I'm talking about."

"Yeah Mayumi, be careful." Racheal came out of the kitchen carrying a beer. "Mike probably weirded him out with his talk on Wednesday." 

Mayumi shrugged her shoulders. "I don't get Christianity.   Mike was just trying to motivate people to do the right thing.  Would it have been better if he had just tried to help them feel better about their screw ups?"

"Yeah." I agreed with Mayumi, "What good would I have done the people in my investment group if I had focused on helping them feel better about the money they had lost, instead of helping them make more?"

Rachael shook her head religion is different."Next time try to dodge subjects like divorce." She sighed,  "That was pretty cringy!"

Mayumi, spread a couple of the cushions on the couch apart and smirked. "Mike you actually own this place don't you?" She pulled her leggings down at the same time as she sat.

"He does.." Rachael unbuckled her belt.

"I'm the main investor.."

"And you're going to tear it down to build a mall?" She spread her legs slightly and exposed her hairy bush as she peed into the couch.

"Yeah….  Do you idiots have to destroy our furniture?"

Rachael stuck her tongue out as she squatted, "You're going to tear the buildings down and throw this furniture away anyway."

"Whatever…"

 

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"Mike this place is starting to fill up."  Betty stood with me on the stage as I adjusted my headset.  "How many people do you have the caterers cooking for?" 

"Fifteen hundred."

"You're crazy."  

"I've got money.. What's going on with Rachael and all those people in the black and gold robes?"

"It's a choir group from an old black gospel church that closed down.  They want to perform here."

"Tell them that they are very welcome!  Our congregation is more than half black.  Why not?  Do they have music?" 

"I think they do.  I could play the piano." Betty pointed to the churches huge old grand piano next to the organ.


We opened the service with the old Gospel song "Were You There?"

 

"Were you there when they crucified my Lord? Were you there?

Were you there when they crucified my Lord?

O sometimes it causes me to tremble! tremble! tremble!

Were you there when they crucified my Lord?

Were you there when they nail'd him to the cross?  Were you there?

Were you there when they nail'd him to the cross?

O sometimes it causes me to tremble! tremble! tremble!

Were you there when they nail'd him to the cross?

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?  Were you there?

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?

O sometimes it causes me to tremble! tremble! tremble!

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?

Were you there when the sun refused to shine? Were you there?

Were you there when the sun refused to shine?

O sometimes it causes me to tremble! tremble! tremble!

Were you there when the sun refused to shine?"


 

I took the stage. "Let's give a hand to the former 'Our Savior Baptist' choir!". 

The applause was deafening.  The church was full! People were even standing at the back.  

"Hi, I'm Pastor Mike.  That's my wife Betty on the piano, Rachael on the guitar, Heidi on the organ, and Mayumi on the drums.

If this is your first time here I'd like to welcome you.  I've just started on the Book of Matthew.  Last Sunday we covered chapter one, so please turn to chapter two."

Chapter two told the story of the 'Three Kings' who visited the baby Jesus.  It told about how Herod kill all of the baby boys in the area.  And it told about how Joseph and Mary fled with Jesus to Egypt, and later returned after Herod's death to Galilee.

"The Greek term 'magoi' was used for the 'Three Kings' -- the three wisemen.  In Persian, and Babylonian culture, it referred to those who studied astronomy, prophecy, medicine, and religion.  They maybe also dabbled in sorcery and fortune telling.." 

I spotted Buck and Jim seated in the front row near the band.  Chris, and his crew seated behind them.  Mayumi was smiling at Chris.

"Now the Magoi were supposed to report back to Herod but instead they dodged him.  He was clearly a miserable man.  He had great wealth and power, but he didn't know love or compassion.  For a King to kill his own subjects baby boys was horrific.  Joseph on the other hand would do anything to protect his wife and son.  He took them to Egypt.  It couldn't have been easy but he did what he had to do.

Now my father spent his life chasing money, and my mother did too, to an extent…"  I exhaled a little more dramatically than I intended.   "When my father did well we were on top of the world, and when he did badly he drank.  It cost him the marriage and he ultimately drank himself to death. My mom died not much later in a car crash."  I glanced over at Rachael.  She rolled her eyes at me.   "My dad left me a lot money... and for a number of years I followed his example,  but it was empty...  I was happier even when he was doing his worst -- but he was still together with my mom."  I noticed Jim nodding.  "We need to be there for our families and kids.

Can I hear an Amen?" 

"AMEN!" The audience echoed me loudly.


 

The choir closed out the service with "Go Down Moses"

"When Israel was in Egypt land

Let my people go

Oppressed so hard they could not stand

Let My people go

 

So the God sayeth, “Go down, Moses way down in Egypt land

Tell old Pharaoh to let My people go”

 

So Moses went to Egypt land

Let My people go

He made old Pharaoh understand

Let My people go"


 

Betty stood at the churches front door with me.  We were already exhausted from shaking hands. "Wow, that's a lot of people."

"I know..  We can't keep these breakfasts up.  It's costing us a fortune."

"You mean you."

"No, I mean us."

"What the fuck are we doing Mike?"

"I don't know.. We're already getting more people than we can handle.  It's time to get the old speakers in the parking lot working again.  People can watch the service on our billboard.  That's obviously why Pastor Rick put those speakers and that fancy billboard in."

 

---------

 

"Rachael, turn that amp down a little!" Betty yelled down at Rachael.

Rachael stuck her tongue out and Mayumi and Chris exchanged amused looks.

"Let's talk in the lobby." Megan -- Chris's electrical expert -- suggested.  

"Mike!" Buck greeted us in the lobby.  "Joey's got a toner.  We can figure out where everything goes."

Joey Williams opened a panel to right of the chapel doors.  "Wow, you've got quite an audio system here."

"Boy, do they ever!" Buck opened one of the chapel doors a crack. "Were they just playing the 'Stones'?" 

"Yeah!" Chris laughed, "Now they're playing 'Blondie'."

Rachael sang 'Call me', as she played the guitar.  She was surprisingly good.  Mayumi finished the song with an incredible drum roll.

"You've got some loose wires here." Joey went to work tightening things up.  "Don't worry, it's all low voltage."

Mayumi started to drum wildly, with Rachael accompanying on the guitar, and Heidi on the organ.  The music sounded reminiscent of 'Blondie'.

"Betty, what are those idiots playing?"

"Those fuckers.." Betty said under her breath.

"Uhhh!  Uhhh! Uhhh!" Rachael, Heidi, and Mayumi gasped in unison.  "Let's all fuck, let's all screw. Screwing sets us free.  It's time to take a break from this fucked up reality!"

Buck snickered, "What?"

"See!" Megan gave Chris a smug look.  "I told you, they're 'Full Bush'."

 

"My knight, I am the Holy Grail" Rachael sung the chorus.

 

"My body's made for sin

My pussy's wet

Your cock is hard

Push me down and force it in!"

"Umm! Umm! Umm!" The others joined in.  "Let's all fuck, let's all screw. Screwing sets us free.  It's time to take a break from this fucked up reality!

What a way to die

I'm just a demon in distress

An illusion wrapped in lies

I sink my teeth into your flesh

No one hears your cries 

Ohhh! Ohhh! Ohhh! Let's all fuck, let's all screw Screwing sets us free. It's time to take a break from this fucked up reality!"

 

The song became totally instrumental, but the beat was such that you could tell what the music was suggesting.

"Wow.." Buck looked both shocked and amused. "That was not the type of song I would expect from a church band..."

"We kinda went through a punk phase.." Betty smiled weakly.

"Yeah ya did!." Chris laughed uncomfortably.  "I went to Berkeley. I'm no prude, but fuck, you guys had quite the reputation."

Betty stuck her tongue out and headed into the chapel.

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"Hello? This is Pastor Mike."

"Hello Pastor Mike, this is Janet with 'News at Five'. We are doing a 'News at Five' Special Report' on the local churches. We would like to interview you and your wife Betty. Your new church is generating a lot of excitement! Some people view you as the second coming, others argue that you are preaching a dangerous works based Christianity.

We could schedule the interview for Wednesday. That would give you a couple of days to prepare."

"Okay, that sounds great." I agreed. "We would love to do it!"

 

-------------

 

"Could we play the Depeche Mode song 'Reach out, touch me Jesus'?"

"Sure." Janet agreed, "..that would be a great way to start the interview. Your band has created a lot of excitement."

The camera crew was surprisingly large. Several camera men filmed the performance. Then the interview with Betty and me began.

"Pastor Mike, I've heard you have a rather.. strong.. manner of preaching." Janet gave me a strange smirk. "People are suggesting that you preach a very judgemental hate filled gospel of Salvation by works."

"Really? I've only gone through the first two chapters of the Book of Matthew. I haven't preached about Salvation yet. What do you mean by 'Salvation by works'? A person is really only as good, or bad, as they behave."

"You don't think faith counts for something?"

I shrugged, "It's like James said: 'Faith without deeds is dead, show me a man of faith, and I'll show you a man of deeds.'"

"Wow Pastor Mike, you know your Bible." Janet said almost sarcastically.

"Yeah, I've spent a lot of time reading the Bible over the last five years. And I listened to taped sermons by Pastor Rick."

"Taped sermons?"

"Yes, on old cassette tapes. I used an old Sony Walkman."

"And that inspired you to try and revive Pastor Rick's church -- 'The Arc'?"

"Yeah.. You could say I felt a calling." 

Betty and I had agreed to try and only tell the truth -- as an insurance policy -- and I wasn't really lying.

Janet turned to Betty, "Betty, I understand your father is a Pastor."

"Yes." Betty nodded, "My stepfather."

"What does he think of your ministry here?"

"I don't honestly know." Betty admitted. "I don't have much contact with my mother or my stepfather. He probably wouldn't like it.. Mike preaches a different kind of Christianity."

"Well thank you for your time!" Janet ended the interview abruptly.

"Wow, that was shorter than I expected!" I watched Janet and the film crew leave.

"Much shorter." Betty agreed. "She only asked me one question They seem to be in a hurry."

 

-------------

 

We set up a little screening party in the church cafeteria.

"News at Five has titled this episode 'Bad Times at The Arc.' Jim frowned.

"I know.. they told us it was going to be about the local churches.. not just us!"

Rachael laughed, "Mike you're like Billy Lee in that movie 'Bad Times at the El Royale'!"

"I know, that's what I told Betty."

Buck frowned at me, and Chris and Jim flashed anxious looks.

The program started out with a mini-documentary about Pastor Rick and his church. It emphasized his secret drug addiction and how it ultimately led to his death.  

Then the program switched gears and showed the church sitting vacant. The church had been purchased by an investment group with plans to raze the building and put a shopping Mall on the property.  

Out of nowhere we had appeared. A dynamic preacher with a strange overly simplistic interpretation of the Bible -- and a surprisingly good all female band.

 

"Reach out and touch faith

Your own personal Jesus

Someone to hear your prayers

Someone who cares

Your own personal Jesus

Someone to hear your prayers

Someone who's there.."

 

Cameras panned around the group as Betty sang the lead and the others backed her up and played their instruments.

The interview began with the music still playing softly in the background.

"I've spent a lot of time reading the Bible over the last five years. And I listened to taped sermons by Pastor Rick."

"Taped sermons?"

"Yes, on old cassette tapes. I used an old Sony Walkman."

"And that inspired you to try and revive Pastor Rick's church -- 'The Arc'?"

"Yes, you could say I felt a calling." 

 

"Pastor Rick," The narrator talked while I continued to talk silently in the background. "..slso known as Mike Anderson, was the son of Reg Anderson, a small-time get rich quick guru.  

When Reg drank himself to death Mike took over. Mike did extremely well until it was revealed that he was investing in stocks and properties with insider information, and violating ethical standards."

"Mike's not a bad guy." Jerry, from my investment group, told the camera. "He made me, and my family, a lot of money, but he did use advice from a stock insider… I don't know if I would call, the other things he did, crimes.. But you can safely say," He laughed, " ..that Mike lacks respect for convention!"

The narrator continued. "Mike Anderson served five years -- the maximum penalty -- because of his refusal to cooperate with investigators." 

"They wanted to know how much money I had, and where I had stashed it." I revealed without thinking. "I just played dumb."

They returned to Janet interviewing Betty, "Betty, I understand your father is a Pastor."

"Yes." Betty nodded, "My stepfather."

"What does he think of your ministry here?"

"I don't honestly know." Betty admitted. "I don't have much contact with my mother or my stepfather. He probably wouldn't like it.. Mike preaches a different kind of Christianity."

The video switched to an intense middle-aged man in a black suit outside a church. "My step-daughter is a mixed up rebellious woman." He shook his head. "She graduated from Juilliard with Honors.. then formed a horrible punk band with her friends."

"The band was called 'Full Bush'." the narrator explained.

The video cut to a dark 'underground' San Francisco nightclub, with the soundtrack turned off. Betty unfastened her jeans as she sang, and let them drop to the floor. Then she turned around and twirked at the audience as she pulled her lacy panties down.

Betty stomped to edge of the stage, squatted down, spread her legs in a crab position, and released a huge fountain of pee into the crowd. Then she stood back up and headed to another part of the stage, and sent a fountain into another part of the crowd.

Rachael, Heidi, and Mayumi performed a little strip show behind Betty, and headed to the edge of the stage as she headed back to the microphone. Betty sang as the other three soaked down the crowd.

"Rachael!" Jim made a face, "That censoring doesn't really hide much." 

"We were being really raunchy.." Rachael smiled awkwardly.

"Full Bush disappeared from the public eye arounf six months ago when they got banned from all of the major San Francisco venues." The narrator continued, "Only to resurface as The Arc's new church band."

Cell phone video showed the band performing outdoors on the stage at the last breakfast.

"Pastor Martin, from 'The Beacon'" The text at the top of the screen read. I recognized the man wearing the neck brace. He was the driver of the pickup truck that had run the red light near "The Beacon".

"We stand as a beacon of hope and love in this broken world." Pastor Martin spoke with emotion. "The major problem with judgmental works based sermons -- like Mike Anderson preaches -- has to do with salvation." He pointed a remote at a large tv behind him and clicked it.

"I haven't preached about Salvation yet." I said on the TV. "What do you mean by 'Salvation by works'? A person is really only as good, or bad, as they behave." 

"No Mike!" Pastor Martin shook his, "We all fall short. The disingenuous heart of an unregenerate man prevents him from fully appreciating the extent of his own worldly failings or the abundance of grace offered by a relationship with his own personal Savior - our Lord Jesus Christ."

Rachael burst out laughing, "Wow, he's really smart!"

Pastor Martin sighed, "In the end... when you come before the Judge…. on your judgment day……. are you going to argue that your good deeds outweighed your bad? Or….. are you going to argue that you received Jesus? In you sin... in your desperately need…. you received a Savior!" 

 The credits ran as the show ended.

"Wow, they put a lot of effort into that.." Betty groaned, "..but watch our numbers grow now."

Mayumi snickered, "That guy at the end is going to talk God into letting him into heaven --In a court of law!"

Heidi snuggled up with Buck, "I don't think God's going to go for it." 

"Believe me you don't want to go before a Judge." I took a sip of beer. "I got five years for vague 'ethics' violations."

Betty made a face, "Mike, you did all sorts of things you shouldn't have."

"Yeah, but they weren't really illegal."

"So what did you really do that got you into so much trouble Mike?" Buck asked under his breath.

"I don't really know…... I'm trying to figure that out." I exhaled, "Right after bought this church with my investment group, everybody suddenly started investigating me.

The investment group.." I sighed, "..is run by Ben Waller now. He's the lawyer who set up the Trust."

Jim frowned, "Mike, did you personally know Pastor Rick?"

"Jim, my father was an atheist "

Buck folded his arms, "Mike, that's not what he asked."

"No, I did not know him.. but my father did."

-----------

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"Wow, I can't believe how many people are still coming." Betty watched as people poured into the church. "I would have thought that little expose would have slowed things down."

"That's not what you said." I searched the church for Rachael, Heidi, and Mayumi. "Where are they?" I asked in frustration.

"Fuck I don't know.."

"We've got a full church..."

"Just start it." Betty sighed. "Remember you're on camera and this is being projected on the outdoor screen."

I turned on the headset, "Well good morning ladies and gentlemen.." It was an awkward start. "I was planning on opening with music, but our band seems to have gone AWOL..". I looked over at the choir. Maybe they could perform without music?

CLICK! It was just a little click. Heidi, Rachael, and Mayumi ran down the stairs!

The audience rose to their feet and started clapping. When the applause died down the band opened with the Beatles song "Revolution". It was an odd choice to start a service with but somehow it seemed perfect.

We got about fifteen hundred people at the first service, and fifteen hundred at the second.

 

---------

 

We limited the investment dinner to the first five hundred to reserve spots.

I started off discussing various types of savings accounts, then I moved onto retirement accounts -- like IRA'a and 401K's.

I sensed a general sense of frustration so I opened the discussion to questions.

"We have five kids. We can't even make ends meet." A young black mother told me. "How could we ever get money to invest?"

"Well what's your budget like? Where is the majority of your money being spent?"

"Daycare you fucking dumbshit!" A man yelled out. It was Brett...

"How much does daycare cost?"

"It used to cost us almost six hundred a week!" Brett's voice shook. "Now my mother takes care of the kids."

"What do you make per week after taxes?" I asked carefully.

"Less than six hundred.." Brett flushed. "We tried everything, separate accounts, shopping together.." He stopped.

I took a breath, "Brett unless you both net over six hundred a week, the person with the lower paying job should quit and hold out for a better job."

"Yeah.. well she didn't want to do that. Do you want to stay home and take care of the kids all day?! Pastor Mike you really want to help us out? You've got this great big building. Why don't you set up affordable daycare?"

"Mike, he's got a point." Betty agreed.

"You really want to do it Betty?" I asked without turning my headset off.

Betty nodded.

"Okay," I turned to the crowd, "..let's do it. But I don't want to charge for it. Let's finance it as a church."

At the end of the dinner an old well dressed black woman approached us. "Pastor Mike, I own Baker Foods. I'll help finance the daycare."

 

--------------

 

Rachael, and Heidi took care of the legal side of setting up the daycare. They got the necessary permits from the city, and the documents for the parents to sign.

"Pastor Mike." Brett almost glared, "You better know what you're doing because my ex doesn't want our kids in this program."

"Brett, you've got custody, and you've signed all of the legal papers. There is nothing she can do."

"You don't know my wife." Brett folded his arms. "You wouldn't believe how much of a fight it was to get her to agree to meet me here. She's probably just going to bitch at me again for drinking beer in front of the kids, or some dumb thing."

"Yeah, well just show her these papers." I looked at the kids sitting together in a sad unhappy group and suddenly felt depressed. "I going to go and give Betty a hand with some cleaning."

"She finally showed up." Betty poked her head into the closet, behind the stage, where I was stacking chairs. 

"You want me to talk to her?"

Betty shook her head. "Just stay out of it."

"Mommy don't go!" I heard the youngest boy crying."

"Screw it I'm going to talk to her!"

"Sara, you can't keep doing this." Brett pleaded, "At least come to dinner with us."

"No Brett it's over.."

Sara was dressed in a black hoodie, but I caught a glimpse of her face as she turned to head up the stairs.

"Sara wait!" Brett called.

"No.."

"Sara wait! I want to talk to you." I called after her. Sara ignored me.

"Sara stop! Stop! STOP!!!" I was literally shaking as I chased after her.

"Michael leave me alone!" Sara yelled back at me.

"No!"

"Michael you're insane!" Sara's voice shook.

"So what?" I struggled to speak "Sara.. I.. just.. want.. to talk.."

"Maybe I don't want to talk.."

"Sara, you think…. I blame you?

"Michael what the fuck are you doing here? I was the religious one." 

"Yeah.. you used.. to get into screaming arguments... with mom… when she threatened… to divorce dad…." I tried to fight back the tears. "And now.. you're divorced."

"I married a fucking loser history teacher who got laid off. Substitute teaching doesn't pay the bills."

"All you had were fucking money problems?"

Betty and Brett approached us cautiously.

Sara's face tensed. "Michael….. you're fucking insane.  You take things too far."

"I take things too far? Jesus fucking Christ Sara.. you're the only family I've got left..."

"Michael, religion is a fucking major deal down here.  The shit you're doing in this church is going to get you killed."

"Killed?"

Sara turned to Betty, "You must be Pussy? Are you fucking my baby brother?"

"Classy Sara.." I groaned.

Betty held up her middle finger.

"Are you guys really married?"

"If you come to dinner with us, and Brett and the kids, I'll tell you."

"Are you offering to pay?"

"Yeah"

Sara stood and looked at me with tears in her eyes.

 

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"The King's Buffet?" Betty snickered.

"It was where the kids wanted to go."

"Yes, Uncle Mike." Betty sighed, "At least it's not going to cost you much."

"Betty, you would be amazed at how much money I have."

Brett gasped. "You guys really aren't married!" He threw up his hands and headed into the restaurant. Sara was waiting in line to put our name on the list. 

"I think we should get married." Betty watched Brett and Sara talk.

"So people in our church don't find out?"

"No," Betty gave me a dirty look. "Mike don't play dumb. I think we should get married."

"I think we should too.."

 

Sara cornered me the second I stepped into the restaurant, "Michael you dumdshit.." She whispered in my ear, "Brett says you guys aren't married."

"We aren't.." 

"Michael, you're insane."

"Look who's talking. At least I don't run from everything. You're still running!"

"Earth to Michael." Sara waved her hand in my face. "We're talking about you. What happens if people find out? What happens if Betty gets pregnant?"

"I am pregnant," Betty cut in. "..and we are planning on getting married."

"Well don't wait forever!" Sara gave me a wide-eyed incredulous look.

"Mommy, the lady is signaling to us." The oldest boy said urgently.

"Okay Johnny." Sara sighed.

"Hurry up Pastor Mike!" Johnny said impatiently

"Uncle Mike!" I corrected.

"You're not really our uncle." The younger boy, Billy, laughed.

"Yes, I really am. Your mommy is my sister."

"That's what an uncle is?"

"Yes."

Brett looked annoyed. "So what do I call you?"

"Call me Mike."

 

------------

 

The children's enthusiasm was contagious and I found myself with an overloaded plate.

"Michael," Sara sat across from us with the kids separating her from Brett. "..do you ever pray to Jesus?"

"You know what dad used to say.."

"What did he say?" Betty asked.

I put on an effeminate voice, "I can't do it. I need a big strong man to do it for me."

"Very funny Michael." Sara rolled her eyes.

Brett had an uncomfortable look on his face.

"Aren't you the typical Christian Sara..." Betty groaned. "..more concerned with the speck in other people's eyes than the log in your own.."

"So you guys are going to help Brett out with money?!" Sara snickered.

"Yes." I nodded.

"No, you're not." Brett shook his head. "I am not a charity case."

"Brett, I don't have to give you money." I said cautiously. "We're talking about setting up a preschool at the church, and you're got a degree in education."

"Michael.." Sara gave me an anxious look. "..you don't understand how churches work… It's okay to be a small independent church, but you're not small. Most churches are connected together in networks… The sort of stuff you are preaching and doing is too…. different."

"Look Mike," Brett cut in. "I don't find you an easy person to like, but I like what you're doing with the church. I like your common sense style of preaching and your simple church... You're the only pastor, no bible studies, no youth group, no young adults, no mission trips.. And you hold community events like the breakfasts, and dinners. And now you're going to offer free daycare. Mike.." He addressed me again. "..what was the last big thing that Jesus did before he got executed?"

"Oh gawd, here he goes again.." Sara sighed. "Brett the history teacher.."

"The Last Supper?"

"No! He ran the money changers out of the Temple!"

"Wasn't that one of first things he did?"

"In the Book of John.."

"He's right." Betty agreed. "He did it towards the end in the books of Matthew, Mark, and Luke."

"Yes." Brett nodded. "Jesus went to Jeruselum for the Passover festival. He found people selling things and changing money in the Temple…. He turned over tables, got a whip -- and drove the people and animals out.

Jesus was clearly trying to make changes to Judaism. He preached, he argued with the Pharisees, and then he went to the heart of the Passover festival -- the Temple -- and ran the venders and money changers out!!"

"And he was crucified.." I sighed. "So how does that relate to us?"

"Did you just come here to find Sara? Or are you trying to shake up the status quo? You're interview has gone viral. Are you trying to change popular Christianity?" Brett looked me in the eye. "Mike are you trying to get even with the people who threw you in jail?"

"Brett what's the worst they could do?" I dodged his question. "Shut our daycare down?"

 

---------

 

"Should we have told Brett and Sara about how I am going to appear live on News at Five tomorrow?" I asked Betty as we pulled into the church parking lot.

"Nah, we don't need their approval. I think we're almost bulletproof at this point." Betty glanced over at the church. "Why are The lights on in the church lobby?" 

"I don't know let's check it out."

 

 

"Mike," Rachael came out of an empty office holding a beer. "..Mayumi says you and Betty went out with your sister, and her family."

"Yeah…"

"You've been holding out on us!" Heidi laughed from inside the office.  

Heidi, and Mayumi sat on the desk drinking beer. A couple of pizza boxes and the remnants of a case of beer sat over on the chairs. 

Heidi hopped off of the table, grabbed a beer from the case, and opened it for me. "So what's her name?" She handed me the beer.

"Sara.." I took a sip of beer as Heidi unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans.

"Wanna see my well used pussy?" Heidi pulled her jeans and plain white panties down exposing her raw, completely unshaven hairy pussy. "Buck's as virile as he looks." She grinned as she sat back against the wall.

"I don't want to know!" I laughed.

"Awww!" Heidi made a comical face as a thick stream of pee jetted from her pussy and splashed noisiliy on the low carpet.

"Heidi, mind if I join you?" Rachael shuffled into the room with her jeans and panties around her ankles. The bushy hair on her pussy was darker than Heidi's but equally 'bushy'. She positioned her rear against the wall not far from Heidi and nonchalantly let loose on the carpet with a jet like stream.

Mayumi hopped down from the table and wiggled her jeans and lacy pink panties down. Her pussy was also completely unshaven but the black hair was much straighter and not as thick. She sat back on the edge of the desk and immediately released a clean stream of pee onto the carpet. "The only pussy Mike should be looking at is that one." Mayumi smirked and pointed at Betty.

Betty nodded, "A couple of days ago Mike was so horny he saw my pussy six times… But he hasn't even it even once yesterday, or today.."

"I'm not masterbating!" I said defensively. I made a sad face. "Betty won't let me..." 

Betty smirked, "I think Mike needs to pee! Check out that bulge!" She giddily set her hand on my crotch. "Here Mike, let me help you!" She unzipped my pants. "Here.." She worked her hand into my underwear and carefully pulled my hard cock out. I really did need to go and if I hadn't had a hard-on I would have practically been peeing my pants.

"Nice cock!" Heidi grinned. "Not as big as Buck's but still pretty nice!" She grabbed another beer, twisted the cap off and began mouthing it like she was sucking on a cock.

"Now how do you make this thing work?" Betty wrapped her hand around my cock softly.

"Ahhaha!!" Heidi shrieked as I began peeing.

Betty aimed my stream around on the carpet.

"If I had a cock I would piss everywhere!" Rachael laughed.

"You already do!" Mayumi snickered.

"I've pissed outside in front of Jim a couple of times." Rachael grinned broadly. "He seemed a little surprised but he didn't say anything. I think he liked it."

"I've done that in front of Buck too." Heidi drank some more beer. "He didn't say anything but he had a big grin on his face."

Mayumi grinned smugly, "I peed in front of Chris in the hallway. He laughed and told me that I was a devil.  He said that was such a nasty thing to do, that it was a pervy turn-on."

"You guys are crazy!" I finished my beer as Betty softly stroked my cock.

"Com'on Mike put that cock in Betty's pussy." Heidi finished her beer. "I dare you to do it right in front of us!"

"I've gotta piss." Betty unfastened her jeans.

"So? Piss at orgasm." Rachael suggested.

"Okay!" Betty stepped out of her jeans and panties. "Fuck me Mike!" She stuck her tongue out at Rachael and Heidi and leaned forward on the table.

It seemed like a weird thing to do but after looking at so many pussies I was horny as hell.

"Oh.. that feels good!" Betty sighed as I slid inside her.

It felt good to me too, but I was no pornstar so I had to hang on for dear life to keep from coming too early. It was intense, and animalistic -- and wet!

"So Mike.." Heidi pulled her pants down and squatted over an open desk drawer. "..tell us about Sara."

 

 ----------

 

I sat to Pastor Donald's right, and Pastor Martin sat to his left.

A young blonde female tech, in a colorful "Raiders of the lost Arc" tee shirt, rushed to connect loose wires as the camera crew took their places. The studio was in the midst of a renovation.

"Pastor Martin," Janet opened, "I understand big things are going on at The Beacon, and New Covanant'."

Pastor Martin cleared his throat. "Yes, both of our churches are doing a series on 'Emotionally Healthy Spirituality'. He was reasonably tall at around six feet, but his huge belly, and relatively narrow shoulders made him appear smaller. "We must not use God to run from God!" He said dramatically.

The blonde tech rolled her eyes and I was suddenly overcome by the giggles. I covered my mouth to hide my expression.

"I have been guilty!" Pastor Martin spoke magnamously. "But now rather than spending too much time on ‘God-activities’...which could keep me from addressing Gods plans….. I like to head over to the club and play a round or two of golf with Pastor Donald. I find it clears my head, and…. .”. He fixed his gaze on the blonde tech who was now fighting the giggles along with me. Her shirt had a picture of The Arc of the Covenant, but it read "The Arc Church". A couple of the camera men were also wearing similar shirts.

"Jennifer stop it!" Janet said loudly to the tech. She waited for Pastor Martin, but he just sat growing red in the face. She turned to me, "Mike.. your.. church has been the source of rumors recently."

"Yes," I struggled to compose myself, "..we are working on setting a free preschool, and daycare."

One of the cameramen pumped his fist victoriously.

"That's not a church function!" Pastor Donald looked as intense as he had the morning at the restaurant.

"It's our 'Daycare Ministry'." I struggled not to laugh.

"You think you can just tack the word 'Ministry' on to anything and it becomes a church function?!"

"Yes!" I burst out laughing. "We will be holding a free dinner this coming Friday.. to discuss the preschool and daycare, and set up a waiting list... Please go online to The Arc's website for a dinner reservation. The main course will be baby back ribs."

"This is absurd!" Pastor Martin stood up. "Your daycare ministry is the only ministry you've got!" 

I shook my head, "We've also got an adult singles ministry."

"And if you do this daycare thing you won't be able to afford any other ministries or mission trips!"

"Nope." I got up fast and took a couple of steps back as Pastor Martin seemed to lunge in my direction. His foot was caught on a cord. He went down hard!

"That's it Mike!" The station manager yelled at me. "You're outta here!"

----------

 

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The Friday dinner was huge -- almost a thousand people attended.

 

"Michael this is truly insane.  How can you handle so many kids?" Sara covered her eyes with her hands. "What are you going to do?  You are getting into something that is way over your head!"

I shrugged my shoulders, "I'll do what I did with my investment group.  I'll get ideas from people here and we'll all work together to develop a plan."

"Michael! The reason daycare costs so much is that you have to pay people to manage all of the kids!  The people who run daycare centers are not rich!"

"I think we can get volunteer help, but I also have a couple of very wealthy people offering to help finance the program."

"You are still going to have to hire a lot of people."

"So? Sara are you looking for a job?"

 

-------

 

We agreed to start out with four hundred kids.  A third of those would be bussed to school in the morning and picked up in the afternoon.

We needed to hire bus drivers and preschool teachers.  We would manage groups of twenty kids with one teacher, and at least one volunteer assistant.

Our "preschool" would be the cafeteria opened into the gym, and we could utilize the huge lawn behind the church as a playground.  

 

---------

 

It was Saturday afternoon and the girls were practicing in the chapel.  Our new Saturday afternoon service had been surprisingly packed.  Both the church and the parking lot had been full.

"Mike, check this out." Betty led me down the hallway and into one of the the churches large janitorial closet.  She took off her dress, and hung it on a hook on the wall.  Underneath she wore light grey leggings, and a white tee shirt.

"Nice.."

Betty laughed, "Don't look at me, look at the wall."

The wall at the end of the closet looked like it had come loose on one side.  Betty slid her hand into the crack and swung the spring loaded 'wall' open.  Behind the wall was a heavy steel door.  "This is where Chris and Mayumi have been sneaking off to." She opened the door.  The door had a heavy vault style lock on the back.

"A panic room?"

"More than a panic room." Betty led the way down the carpeted stairs and stopped at the entrance to the 'basement' hallway.

"There's a half dozen rooms, and even a kitchen and a bathroom down here." Betty guided my hand to her crotch.  I felt a wonderful little bulge as I began rubbing.

"Check this out." Betty led me into a office with a desk and a wall of surveillance camera screens.  She opened one of the desks large bottom drawers and pulled out a handgun.

"Is that loaded?"

"I think it is." Betty set it on the desk.  She pulled her leggings down and half half sat, half squatted over the drawer.

"Betty wait! What are those papers in the drawer?" 

"Just some old newspaper clippings." Betty peed noisiliy into the drawer. "Gawd I love being a pee vandal!"

"Betty, do you think it's dangerous here?  I mean in Louisiana.."

"I don't know." Betty wiped herself with a tissue, from an old box on top of the desk, and tossed it in the drawer.

"Sara says we're going to get ourselves killed." I reached for Betty's pussy before she could pull her leggings up.  She gasped at my touch.

"Somebody...Mmm.. killed Pastor Rick." Betty pushed my hand away and squatted down to remove her shoes and leggings completely.  

I undid my pants as Betty hopped up onto the desk.  She raised her shirt and bra so I could suck on her nipples while I fingered her pussy, and she played with my cock and balls.

"Well we are rocking the boat here."  Betty closed her eyes as I slid my cock into her warm wet pussy. "Mmm.. Mmm...Mmm.. "Ohh.. Mike.. Mmm...I can't believe we're…. Mmm..doing this.... preschool thing.. "

"We'll… Uhh.. make a lot of money.. and.. Uhh.. have a lot of fun.. Uhhh!!"

"Mike..Umm.. You are.. Umm.. so full...Umm.. of shit. Umm!!" Betty pussy began choking my cock, and I almost collapsed onto her.

"Ohhh…" I lay on the desk with Betty. "I think we're going to have to clean up our act.."

"We have to be more discrete about where and when we pee.." Betty smiled. "Com'on I have more to show you.

We were barely dressed when the office door suddenly swung open. Buck poked his head in.  "What are you guys doing down here?"

"Making babies." Betty smirked.

"I believe it.." Buck laughed. "What is this place?"

"It seems to be some sort of panic room."

Buck nodded, "There was quirky weird little church here originally.  The Pastor was one of those end times types. Pastor Rick tore the place down and built this huge megachurch in it's place.  I suspect this was part of the original church." He glanced out into the hallway. "Heidi, what are you doing?! We're not in the woods." He turned back to me, "Mike.."

I walked over to Buck.

 "Heidi just.." Buck half whispered.

"Pissed on the carpet?" Betty asked loudly.

"Yeah.."

Betty grinned, "My first day at Juilliard, Heidi and Mayumi, came by my dorm room and asked where the restrooms were.  My roommate Rachael told them to just piss in the hallway.  She told them that everybody did it.  So they actually did!  Pretty soon everybody really was pissing in the hallway -- and the stairwells."

Buck laughed as Heidi snuggled up against him. "Shame on you!"

"I thought all men were perverts, and liked that sort of thing." Betty snickered.

"Who says we don't?"  I clicked the power button on a remote and the video screens turned on.  

"Mike, who are they?" Buck pointed to one of the screens that showed the far side of the parking lot. Three black sedans were parked.  Men in black suits, and old style black hats, milled around the cars. "Are they spooks?"

"You mean CIA?" Heidi asked.

Buck nodded.  "Those definitely look like government vehicles -- without any plates... but those guys… they look more like...Men in Black."

"They sure do." I stepped closer to the screen. "Nobody wears hats like that anymore, and who wears sunglasses in the dark?"

"People who are hiding their identity." Buck said.

"Woah, what's he doing?"  Betty asked.

One of the men ran across the parking lot.  He carried what appeared to be a hammer.  He ran towards my Subaru and took a big swing.

"Hey! He just broke my windshield!"

Buck laughed, "Here come the others to pick him up."

"Great..I'm going to start parking in the garage."

"Me too." Betty agreed. 

"Mike, is that your gun?" Buck pointed a the nine millimeter on the desk.

"No, we found it in a drawer."

Buck picked it up, and pulled out the clip. "It's loaded." He pulled back the slide, turned the gun over, and dropped the round from the chamber on the table. "Do you mind if I take this?  I'd like to find out who it's registered to."

"Please take it."I looked at the gun.  "I don't think we really want loaded guns lying around the church."

Betty nodded, "Com'on I'll show you guys the best part about this place." She led us down the hallway to the door at the end.  It opened into a rough tunnel in the bedrock.

"Where does this go?" Buck peered into the tunnel.

"To a house." Betty grabbed a flashlight from a small stand just inside the door.. "Com'on I'll show you."

"Mike, there's something Buck needs to talk to you about." Heidi said as we followed Betty.

"Mike," Buck began cautiously. "My friend Steve works for the 'Alcohol and Tobacco Commission.'.." He sighed, "You should gotten permits before you served alcohol at  the singles events.  You're going to have to pay a VERY big fine, to avoid closure of the church and jail time.  It could be fifty thousand or more per incident, but it's up to the judges discretion.  Here are the summons." He handed me the papers.

"I've got the money…but.." Fear gripped me.  "I did extremely well with a slush fund before the FCC shut me down.."

"Millions?"

"More.. I was making so much it was addictive.. But this scares me.. I really screwed up...They're not going to let me off with just a fine.  Not even a big one.."

Buck sighed, "Mike, you're getting paranoid. Don't try to run from this.  That'll get you into real trouble. Look, the worst you'll get is a big fine.  I have never heard of people fined more than twenty grand."

"I don't know.."

"Mike," Betty stopped at a ladder that went up to a wooden trapdoor.  "I want to see the daycare program happen." 

"Mike remember," Buck watched Betty, and Heidi head up the ladder. "..a man who fears only for his own safety, does not know true love… Besides I don't think you have anything to worry about.  Just don't serve alcohol at the church again."

"Buck, I hope your right." I followed him up the ladder.

We were in an old run-down house. 

"It's for sale." Betty pointed at a sign in the window.

"Let's buy it!"

 

--------------

 

The trial, was scheduled for Wednesday, so we postponed opening the daycare for a week.

The Wednesday 'trial' turned out to be only a preliminary meeting with the judge.  He ordered the church closed for the next two weeks -- preceding his decision. 

The first weekend we broadcasted the service on YouTube.  Then the judge ordered the broadcast discontinued and we went the second weekend without a service.

The actual 'Trial' was slow and painful.  The judge talked on and on about the seriousness of my offense, and he discussed the possibility of a jail sentence..  He ultimately gave me a fine of three point two million dollars.  He explained that while this was by far the largest fine ever levied in the state of Louisiana for serving alcohol without a permit, it was also the first time one had been given to a church -- and that increased the severity of the violation.

 

----------

 

The 'Men in Black' didn't show up during the churches closure, but another group did.

"Who are they?" I showed the video to Buck. 

"A bunch of overweight, middle aged men, wearing baseball caps, and driving station wagons." Buck laughed. "They look like Mason's!"

"What do they want?"

"Who knows? Just keep going Mike.  When you put your service on YouTube you went global.  People are talking about this church all over social media."

"I know, they're sending me money.  We're not going to have any trouble funding the daycare."

"Are you going to fix up that house you bought?"

"No.. It's totally hidden by those oak trees, and we would draw attention to it if we started working on it....  Did you find out who that gun belonged to?"

"Yeah, it was Pastor Rick's."

 

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Monday morning was more chaotic than I ever would have imagined.  We organized  the kids into groups of twenty at long tables with a preschool teacher and an assistant.

"A lot of kids haven't eaten breakfast." Brett sighed.  "Could we set up a breakfast for them?  If they all ate breakfast here it would get them seated at their 'home' table and it would help us see who was here and who wasn't."

"Yeah the food service asked me about breakfast. We have the money...    I think we should provide breakfast and lunch for all of the kids."

"And uniforms?  Look at the clothes some of them are wearing."

"Maybe for the preschoolers." I glanced over at Buck who stood in his police uniform next to the piano.  Heidi played Scott Joplin's 'Maple Leaf Rag'.  A large group of kids danced in front of the piano.

"Okay," Brett looked a little stressed. "..I'm going to go and check on the buses that will take the older kids to school." 

Betty motioned me up to the microphone. "Good morning." She welcomed everyone.  "We apologize for the confusion.  Our teachers and volunteers are working hard to get the kids to their home tables.  We will be starting preschool shortly.

Mike is there anything you would like to add?"

"Yes, I was just talking with Brett.  We want to start providing breakfast and lunch for the kids, teachers, and assistants.  Hopefully we can start this next week.  And we are considering uniforms for the preschoolers."

Johnny raised his hand urgently.

"Yes Johnny?"

Johnny looked away from me and beamed, "Pastor Mike is my uncle because my mommy is his sister!" He pointed at Sara, who was the teacher in charge of his table.

"Yes Johnny, you are correct!  Your mother, Sara, is my sister, and I am your uncle." 

"Yes." Sara exhaled loudly, "Michael is my little brother.."  People laughed and it seemed to irritate Sara. "Since the service was broadcasted on YouTube, people have been sending Michael money -- and I think he should be held accountable."

"Sara, I could setup a website."  

"Yes Michael, you could." Sara said sternly. People laughed again. 

A website that broke down our costs and finances really wasn't a bad idea.  It would help other churches that wanted to emulate our program -- and it would help whoever took over after me..

"I'll set up a website." Rachael offered.  

Keeping so many high energy kids under control was a daunting task but we had a large group of volunteers.  The promise of free breakfast, and lunch, as well as the certainty of shortly moving into a paid position would probably keep most of them coming back.

And so began our first day of daycare.


 

-------------

 

"Evangelism by its very nature is charitable." Pastor Martin said on the TV screen. "You give of your time, you minister.  You don't take…. you give."

"What?" Betty sat on my lap on the couch.

"I think he's talking about charity." I took a sip of beer.  I was exhausted and the beer was probably going to put me to sleep.  

"The ludicrous daycare program The Arc is attempting could create a cult-like dependency.  It could foster the misexpectation that it's okay to fund such a program by stealing from Jesus's ministry.  Such a program would be publicly funded if it were not for our chronically unjust social and economic system.   The secular atheists don't tithe to a church.  It would not hurt them to contribute to the better good for once in their selfish, self-centered, lives.

"Oh great.." I groaned. "He's pushing for tax funded government daycare.." 

Betty snickered, "That won't be free!"

To bless the community one must first learn to listen and, in listening, one discovers that the poor are not without resources. They too can financially bless Jesus's ministry!  It's better for them to give, than to take!

Christian daycare already exists.  It is not free, but real charity never is!  The blessings that a truly charitable Christian ministry can bestow on a young life are priceless!  The wealth of this world is nothing compared to an eternal life!  Don't be sold by the empty promises of a so called 'free' program offered by a prosperity ministry -- a cult -- like The Arc!  Remember, you get what you pay for!"

Betty sighed, "Now we're a cult."

"A very popular one.. We got almost six thousand people last weekend.. What are we going to do? We can only hold so many services."

"I don't know.." Betty exhaled. "Your sister Sara is right we're insane.." She smiled, "Do you need to pee?  Let's go over to our new house and pee somewhere we shouldn't!"

 

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I wonder if Pastor Rick knew the original Pastor, of if he  just found this place."   I wondered out of the tunnel and into a small room that had been set up as a lounge.  It contained a vinyl couch, and a large old TV set -- with a tiny screen -- on a flimsy looking stand.

"I have a hunch he just found it."  Betty walked over to a bulletin board covered with newspaper and magazine clippings.  "The type of person who would build a place like this would keep it secret…..  Huh.. he was obsessed with the Jesuits."

"The Jesuits?"

"A Catholic order.  They call themselves the Society of Jesus.  Social justice.. economic justice.. environmental justice....Some of the street punks were really into it..  If you believe these clippings the Jesuits want Communism -- which they will control.  And they want population control.."

I snickered "Maybe that's why they want the older guys to marry divorcees with kids rather than having kids of their own?" I wandered over to the board.

"What?" Betty frowned. "Who?"

"Oh, it was just something that realtor told me when he was showing us the church.  He's not Catholic but maybe the Christians are joining the Catholics.".  I sighed, "I suppose it makes sense that men  -- committed to a lifetime of celibacy --  would try to find fault with people who were free to have sex and kids."

"They call the head of the Jesuits the 'Black Pope"." Betty pointed to a clipping from a magazine.

"Isn't the current Pope Jesuit too?"

Betty nodded, "I think so, but he's also accountable to the 'Black Pope'.   There's also clippings here about the Mason's… networks of churches -- and their connections with world governments."

"Was Pastor Rick trying to connect them all together into one big conspiracy -- or movement?"

Betty shrugged, "There's never really been a separation of church and state."

"And you know what they say? Nothing in Heaven or Hell can stop an idea whose time has come.  Of course where is this all going?"

Betty groaned. "If people, like my step-father, are involved, we will have less freedom, and a much more restrictive religiously controlled world government." She grinned suddenly., "Our church is VERY different."

"Less controlling, with an open adult singles group, an all girl band, and a black gospel choir?"

Betty laughed, "Our church is about fifty percent men.  Other churches have way more women than men."

"Ahh, who needs men?" I said sarcastically.

"See it's reflected in our society."

I snickered "I've always wondered why churches preached such emasculating impotent gospels."

Betty sighed, "It's easier to control weak people -- and get money out of them.."

"Yeah, they're more interested in controlling and pacifying than helping."

"They teach people how to beg." Betty laughed weakly. "They start with the youth groups who beg for money for mission trips."

"And they make certain people into gods." I suggested.  "I'm sort of a mini-god here." 

"Is that one of the reasons you wanted to do this Mike?"

"That was supposed to be a joke... I don't know.."

"Yeah you do." Betty pulled her jeans down and sat down on the arm of the couch.

"Okay, maybe…" My heart pounded as Betty rebelliously peed right in front of me on the carpet.  "I was a god to my investment group before things went bad.  My dad was too.."

"What happened to the first Pastor?" Betty wiped herself with a tissue, and dropped it on the floor. "The one who built this place." She raised her arms as I pulled her blouse off. "What did he do before he started this church?"

"I don't know much about him." I unhooked Betty's bra.  "We've got a couple hundred acres here.  I think he was originally a farmer."

"Really?" Betty unfastened my jeans.  "There was an old black man who asked me if we would consider setting up community gardens here." She pulled my jeanss down and started playing with my cock and balls.

"Sure, why not… I'm the god here, I can do anything I want!" I pulled my own shirt off. "But I'm not a celibate Priest." 

Betty lay back on the floor and spread her legs. "Mike -- say it!"

"Okay Betty.." I took position over Betty and looked right into her eyes, "Will you marry me?" 

"Yes.." Betty kissed me on the lips as she rubbed my cock against her pussy. "Yes I will!" She guided it in.

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We left early Wednesday morning.

"Mike, this car is starting to look like a piece of crap. Who kicked the door in?" Chris asked.

"I don't know.. I'm not going to repair it..."

"Mike, who was the old white guy in the baseball cap talking to you yesterday? Chris changed the subject.

"Bob.." I couldn't remember his last name. "He gave me a list of suggestions.  He's married but he wants us to divide our singles group up into different age groups.  He wants us to start a youth group.  He also wants us to send our youth on mission trips…"

"Are you going to do those things?"

"Hell no! I think he's a Mason.  It's interesting to me that such a conservative guy would want so much structure and control.  Look at the growth of our church.  People want a more open group."

"The Mason's are a very structured controlled group.  I think they believe they can positively affect society by imposing more structure, and control." 

"And less freedom..  I just spent five years locked up in jail.  Honestly this sort of stuff scares the fucking shit out of me. 

I do stuff... I'm not going to let the people who put me in jail win.  But it's like they were trying to slow me down and get me into line.  And it works… They were sure trying to shut the church down for good."

"They?" Chris sounded a little skeptical. "Mike, you're starting to sound paranoid.  Your church is just a building."

"Yeah but it represents something different.  The Jesuits exert influence over the Catholic church, and the Mason's exert influence over the Protestant churches -- and they both try to influence the government.  And now they're starting to sound the same.  I think they've basically joined forces."

"Mike, you sound like the conspiracy stuff in the basement!  The Mason's are too conservatives to join forces with a liberal group like the Jesuits."

"No they aren't." I disagreed.  "It's about power, and money -- even if they don't admit it to themselves.  

When I was running the investment group I got really excited when I broke a hundred thousand dollars.  Then I shot for and broke a million, then a hundred million.   When I broke a billion I felt like I could do anything.  The feeling of power was like nothing I had experienced before."

Mayumi sighed, "And then you bought this church?"

"Yep.."

"Mike, If you really thought there was some sort of religious-political power grab thing going on down here -- a ticking time bomb -- than why did you come down here and start a church?" Chris asked.

"I didn't know what I was getting into.. Remember I'm the guy who can do anything."

"Mike," Chris groaned, "..you're being paranoid.  The worst they could do is shut your church down."

"Unless they wanted to make an example out of me...  Remember Pastor Rick died of a drug overdose, and the guy who bought the building….." I sighed, "..he went to prison for five years....  If you want to see the boogeymen I'll show you the video.  The odds are against us."

"So? A man who fears, only for his own safety, does not know true love." Chris repeated my Bible quote.  "Mike you've gotta keep going.  You've got too many people depending on you."

"Oh, I'll keep going, but remember what we're up against."

 

-----

 

In New Orleans we met Brett's friend. He worked in the county offices.  He performed a Justice of the Peace wedding for Betty, and me.   it was very simple, and very private.

 

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