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Airplanes and pee


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What do you guys do when you are in the middle of your flight.  We all have that experiance wwhen the seatbelt sign is on and we really have to take a wee?  What do you guys and gals do to solve that?  Go in your pants? wait? in a cup?  I haven't had any real experiances of this nature but I would love to hear what you'll have delt with.

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There's a guy on here named Rann who wrote a fictional story about plane pissing (the story is ridiculously hot), but then later he recounted a story about something he actually witnessed on an international flight. Just the idea of something like that happening was amazing (and yet utterly depressing because it's something I would never experience).

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Airplanes are tricky because there's little or no privacy, but I've peed on the floors a couple of times.  If you're lucky enough to be on a relatively empty flight, it's certainly viable.  Being a guy, it's harder to simply scoot forward as @pop-a-squat described and taking my cock out in public is always a risky move, but I love the thrill of a risky public piss and this is no exception.  I've never really let go, but certainly enough to simulate a spilled cup of water. 😉

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Fortunately, I haven't had to deal with it much. I can normally regulate my intake so I don't have to get up until we're at altitude and the other people who don't plan ahead have run to the bathroom.

The one exception was when my job sent me for training. The guy I was traveling with got nervous flying, so we had two beers before we boarded the plane. I didn't think I'd make it. As soon as the seatbelt light went off, I was the first one to the lavatory.

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Great fiction from @Paulypeeps - love it.

Must admit I'm in the camp of normally making sure I don't drink much before the flight.  Last year before everything got grounded I was flying between the UK and Spain at least once every few weeks if not more.   Usually I forced out a pee before boarding and then either took the opportunity mid flight or just a slightly desperate pee on landing before the passport queue.

What I did though during the flight was mostly closed my eyes, noise cancelling headphones on and let my mind wander - dreaming up some of the scenarios and plots of the fiction I've written over the last year.  It's amazing what the mind can come up with when you give it the free chance to roam.

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On 12/7/2020 at 1:54 AM, Jar351 said:

I wonder if the flight attendants ever pee elsewhere besides the airplanes restrooms?

The Civil Aviation Administration of China (CAAC) just issued a concrete recommendation where they should pee in order to avoid the restrooms. See this thread:

 

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I usually end up holding it and then rushing to the toilets on landing. 

Worst one was flight to Vegas. Landed early, but ended up sat on the pan for 40 minutes as police had to come and take off some passengers (from premium economy) who'd been abusive. They were straight back on the next flight to Manchester. 

I digress, was fidgeting and really struggling. I didn't think I was going to make it. When I managed to dash to the toilets, it went on for what seemed like ages. 

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On 12/6/2020 at 6:32 PM, p1ssputz said:

There's a guy on here named Rann who wrote a fictional story about plane pissing (the story is ridiculously hot), but then later he recounted a story about something he actually witnessed on an international flight. Just the idea of something like that happening was amazing (and yet utterly depressing because it's something I would never experience).

Thanks p1ssputz! I did my best to do it justice. The real-world one is here: 

I was actually on a flight recently (domestic) and I was thinking about it. I had never seen anything like that before, nor do I feel I ever will again. It certainly makes my mind wander at the possibilities now whenever I fly...

 

But as for me personally, I have a pretty large bladder so it doesn't bother me much. And, like I mentioned in the anecdote above, I typically try to sit close to the aisle so I usually don't mind getting up to use the lavatory if I have to go.

 

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Two little aeronautical anecdotes, both relatively tame but hopefully will make you smile...

The first was something I remember hearing on the radio probably about 20 years ago, where my local commercial radio channel (northern UK) had that trusted breakfast show formula of two male presenter stooges and the 'fall girl' the cute sounding, have a go at anything travel reporter.  They came to an arrangement that the traffic news would be bolstered by Jude, the 'eye in the sky waggling her wings'. Basically some sponsored light aircraft which would fly her to the normal traffic jam hotspots so she could give a real time account of the queues.

All was going well until one day, when Jude had evidently made a confession off-air to the guys in the studio, probably not expecting them to announce to the whole of the county that she was in the two seater aeroplane, for the duration of the breakfast show, bursting for a wee.  Nothing was ever mentioned whether she made it home dry - but Jude as the eye in the sky didn't seem to carry on long after.

 

The other anecdote came from an ex-RAF guy I used to work with.  He'd been on a Tornado F3 squadron who carried out combat air patrol sorties.  That meant the two crew, strapped rigidly into ejection seats being airborne over the North Sea for 8 hour sorties with airborne refuelling - both of the aircraft and from their packed meals. What goes in must come out of course, but with no option but to wet for the crew. It was absolutely accepted and normal, that was the only way. Crews would wear underwear, thermal suit then the immersion suit - a heavy wetsuit in case they ended up in the sea. Over that their flying suit and tactical equipment - life preserver, survival equipment, maps etc they also wear the anti-G suit.

Now, as legend has it the nav in the rear seat was just in the process of relieving himself in his suit when the pilot - to release the boredom of flying in circles for eight hours - decided to pull some tactical evasive manoeuvres. As soon as the pilot pulls heavily back on the stick, the extra 'g' force would force the crew's blood towards their feet potentially causing blackouts, so the Anti G Suit comes into play automatically, inflating a little like a blood pressure tester. The result is a strong pressure on the upper thighs to keep blood in the upper torso - and in the case of the nav also jet propelling his piss upwards.  From that day onwards, word of the guy's ability to piss on his chest and questions as to how large is cock must be spread from the ladies in the laundry across the whole RAF Station...

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