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Wife of a Pee Fan


CraftyPee

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Hi and welcome, Craftypee.  I think everyone's story is individual and unique to them.  For some the catalyst may be a specific experience or they may never have known a time when pee didn't interest them.  Have you discussed with your husband what might lie behind his interest, assuming he knows of course, which he might not?  To some of us it is a mystery and one which we regard as a mixed blessing.  

Edited by Adyguy6970
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52 minutes ago, Adyguy6970 said:

Hi and welcome, Craftypee.  I think everyone's story is individual and unique to them.  For some the catalyst may be a specific experience or they may never have known a time when pee didn't interest them.  Have you discussed with your husband what might lie behind his interest, assuming he knows of course, which he might not?  To some of us it is a mystery and one which we regard as a mixed blessing.  

He has said that he doesn't fully understand it. I was hoping that some other people would be able to better tell me than he would. He assumed that I would shame him or look down on him as others have in the past, so I think that makes it harder for him to further explain. Which I totally understand. I just want to be able to understand so I can, for lack of better terms, do more to help him and be his source of entertainment. 

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Hi and welcome to the forum.   It sounds a really unique situation and I hope we can satisfy your curiosity and concerns.

The main thing to say is as has been said already, we all have very subtly (or wider) differing interests. You will see things her that may shock you - but that doesn't necessarily mean they are aspects of this fetish that your husband is into.  Obviously I can't speak for your husband - but I can genuinely understand his being truthful when he has trouble explaining his motivation.

In my case it was a gradual fascination that has grown from (I think) a childhood experience, fuelled by a few more instances and the passage of time.  I will also say, in my case I'm similar to your husband in that this is a sole outlet for me - but I am very sure that I don't let it come between my marital relationship.  I guess what I mean by that is please don't assume that your husband has this involvement with all of us because of something missing from his 'real' life.

What you will (I hope) be struck by is that we are a very caring and respectful forum - I hope you'll have seen that in your husband's interactions.  I also hope that you are able to together work through this issue - ideally sharing together and building a common basis to take your marriage forwards. I'd hate to think of anyone using the site to gather evidence leading to the failure of a relationship.

In summary I probably haven't really answered any of your questions - but we're here to try and do so.

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7 minutes ago, CraftyPee said:

He has said that he doesn't fully understand it. I was hoping that some other people would be able to better tell me than he would. He assumed that I would shame him or look down on him as others have in the past, so I think that makes it harder for him to further explain. Which I totally understand. I just want to be able to understand so I can, for lack of better terms, do more to help him and be his source of entertainment. 

To be a bit more specific - the typical things that people here enjoy broadly fall into enjoying an experience themselves, or enjoying other people's experience.   The other people could be opposite sex or could be same sex - not necessarily related to a sexual preference though.

In terms of 'the experience' it could be peeing in an unusual place - sometimes with a 'naughtiness' factor, it could be holding on for as long as possible before peeing - perhaps leading to an enhanced moment of relief. It for some people could be wetting themselves, perhaps invoking childhood memories. Some people have fantasies about being peed upon or vice versa.

But as I say there's a huge spectrum - much of which does seem unfathomable and hard to express - so none of us can speak for your husband on exactly what motivates him.

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8 minutes ago, CraftyPee said:

Thank you so much! I have absolutely no intentions to gather evidence and fail our marriage. Quite the opposite in fact. I truly never knew he had this interest, but since I do, I intend to allow him to have an outlet. I can see that this forum is very respectful and I appreciate that. 

That's good to hear.  I think the most important message for him is that you aren't going to laugh or belittle him, and that it's ok.  In time you can jointly discuss and understand what aspects of the kink appeal to him.  Sometimes just pillow talk around discussing fantasies can be as hot as actually participating in them.

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3 hours ago, CraftyPee said:

Hey everyone! I am new here and I am the wife of a pee fan on this forum. I have been in the dark about my husband's desire to see females peeing in the places that you would not expect and places that are unnatural to see females peeing. I stumbled across some chats he had from members and forced him to open up to me but he is unable to fully open up. So now that I know about this, I want to understand my husband's fascination more. What are some things that I need to know or can anyone explain it better to me?

Welcome. Iam so happy to hear you want to try and understand your husband's fetish and not be completely grossed out by it. Iam sure people will offer you great advice in how to move forward

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Your husband is truly lucky to have a partner so open to this - I've never personally felt shame for my pee kink, but it has definitely fed into my exhibitionism and general GGG-ness - the times I've had partners who were open to trying it (& even enjoyed it) it was just so hot to feel affirmed that I think that feeling has spread into other areas of my sexual life.

Not knowing his specific interests or experiences it's hard to give much perspective, but aside from what you are already doing - being open and curious and accepting - I think some pretty universal advice when it gets down to testing the waters is

  • plan out some of your first play in a way that lets you relax about mess. Maybe it starts with just watching- If it's more, the obvious place to start is in the shower but that can also be cramped and uncomfortable. Waterproof mattress covers or pads are cheap and easy to clean up.
  • drink lots of water, of course - not just because it means more squirty foreplay and fun but because more watery pee is much more fun to play with for most people.
  • enjoy the anticipation. be prepared to get pee-shy and move on, make out, do other things. nothing lasts forever.
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On 10/11/2020 at 10:45 PM, CraftyPee said:

He has said that he doesn't fully understand it. I was hoping that some other people would be able to better tell me than he would. He assumed that I would shame him or look down on him as others have in the past, so I think that makes it harder for him to further explain. Which I totally understand. I just want to be able to understand so I can, for lack of better terms, do more to help him and be his source of entertainment. 

Thanks for that.  I know that some elements fed into what for me has been a lifelong interest, but to some extent it is a mystery to me.  Maybe there are genetic components?  Or perhaps the luck of the draw?  I know sometimes I've wished I didn't have a pee interest because it's easily misunderstood and in some ways life would be easier without it.  To be honest I think I was well into my twenties before I realised it was something which was part of me and accept, not try to fight against it or go on guilt trips.  With the advent of the internet I discovered that I wasn't alone and there were lots of excellent forums - like this one - with really lovely people on them who shared the same sort of feelings and desires as I had.  It has been a great blessing and source of encouragement.   

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On 10/11/2020 at 9:18 PM, CraftyPee said:

Hey everyone! I am new here and I am the wife of a pee fan on this forum. I have been in the dark about my husband's desire to see females peeing in the places that you would not expect and places that are unnatural to see females peeing. I stumbled across some chats he had from members and forced him to open up to me but he is unable to fully open up. So now that I know about this, I want to understand my husband's fascination more. What are some things that I need to know or can anyone explain it better to me?

For me, it's not about the humiliation side of it at all. It's more to do with how intimate it is and how it feels over my skin. I also like the way pee catches the light when done a well lit area, and it especially looks and feels erotic to me when I'm covered in it from head to toe.

I have to say though it's sad that your husband felt the need to keep his fetish hidden from you as if he thought you would react badly to you telling him about it or as if he feared that you'd no longer feel able to satisfy him. I think this maybe points to a bigger problem in your relationship which should be discussed privately between the two of you.

You deserve huge credit for looking for advice rather than getting angry. You have a very understanding attitude and that is something to be commended.

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Hi @CraftyPee and welcome to the forums.   Firstly, I would like to say that I'm impressed by your supportive approach and the way that you have come here to try and find out more.  It is a refreshing response to discovering your husband's interests.

By all means, read some forums to see what different people are interested in and I'm sure that, as others have said, there will be many things on here that are not in your husband's interest, so don't for a minute think that just because they are here means that he will be interested in all of them.

From what you have said, your husband likes to see other ladies peeing - particularly in places that are not classed as standard places to pee (i.e. toilets).  I don't know whether he is someone who takes opportunities to actually see ladies pee or whether he enjoys pictures, stories or videos and you don't say whether these places are catching girls peeing outdoors or girls who deliberately pee in "naughty" places like store fitting rooms, hotel rooms or such like.   I can tell you that I am one who enjoys seeing ladies pee away from the toilet.   I have seen girls peeing outside after a night out on the town, by the sides of cars, whilst out walking and other outdoor activies and I love seeing all of these.  I have also enjoyed watching videos of girls peeing in hotels and fitting rooms or off boats into water for example.

It is very difficult to explain the interest, so I get why your husband says that he can't fully explain it.   For me, I am fascinated by the many different ways that ladies pee - the different types of stream, the different angles, the different ways they position themselves to squat or even stand when peeing.   I love seeing the different attitudes of ladies - some are very reserved and would only risk peeing outside when they were about to wet themselves and even then they would walk for half an hour to find somewhere totally hidden, whilst others will be in a kebab shop, pop outside the door and flood the pavement just because they feel the need to pee.  Some are discrete, some are open about it.   It is a lot about the psychology as well as actually seeing them pee.

I should also point out that it is not necessary to see the source of the pee to make it of interest.  I.e. it is not necessarily about seeing the lady's intimate parts, but is more about the action.   The vast majority of girls that I have seen manage to pee without showing off too much, but I still love to see them - even if it is more or less just a dark shape of a person squatted in a dark corner making a puddle on the tarmac of a side street.   If my wife pees in the pool or a hot tub, I can't see anything, but if she tells me that she is doing it then I'm immediately excited by it. 

Yes, if someone is more visible and pees in daylight with their bum and/or vagina on show then I enjoy that immensely as well, but the peeing is more important than the girls body.

It also (for me) even extends to knowing that a girl has peed somewhere, even if I didn't see it happen.  Seeing a puddle with a tissue in it, or seeing a couple of girls come out of a remote stairwell in a carpark and then going in to find two fresh puddles on the first landing is great.  Yes, I'd rather have caught them in the act, but just seeing the puddle is enough and seeing who left the puddle is even better.   

I don't know if that helps, but if you think my kind of pee interest matches your husbands then I'd be more than happy to answer questions - if you want to keep it a bit private then I am happy for you to private message me or feel free to tag me in here so that I see that you've asked me. (if you don't know how to tag someone, type the "@" symbol and then the name you want.

I hope that you manage to explore his interest and maybe you'll even be able to have fun together.

My wife knows about my interests, but doesn't share them to the same level.  However, she is willing to indulge me from time to time by peeing outside herself, or letting me watch her pee over the bath for example.  I don't know your own views on peeing outside of a toilet, but I bet if you were to offer to pee somewhere other than a toilet for your husband, he would be over the moon.

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I think it is awesome that you want to learn about your husbands pee fetish and want to indulge him, and perhaps find you enjoy pee play yourself.

As you probably by now from previous comments, why he  enjoys this is not the right question. It is difficult to answer. Not many can answer that. There have many discussions on line about that topic, both here and other pee sites. I now realize that my first interest in female desperation came at the pre-sex age of six, seeing a girl desperate.  I talked her into holding it a bit longer; she soon wet her pants .It grew exponentially when I reached puberty, and even more when I discovered the internet. I am now sixty-eight , still enjoy it, and I accept that. I can say it seems to stem from the fact that my own desperation, and feeling I am about to pee is similar to the pressure I feel when I am about to cum . Of course ejaculating if hot and tingly too rather than bladder and penis pressure. Why am I wired this way? I don't know, so I just embrace it.

The correct question what specifically turns him on. You could get some insight by the things discussed in the chats you discovered. There is a wide range of what we enjoy about peeing. Some things I find gross but I accept the preferences of others that accept mine. You could ask him if he wants you to hold your pee for him, and what would arouse him when you finally peed.

Personally, as my screen name  suggests I LOVE female desperation and pants wetting, when she can no longer hold it in anymore. I also enjoy her  to like watching me do the same. It is extra special if we can both be desperate and wet our pants together ( to keep it real not necessarily simultaneously). A true she almost made it with just wet underwear is also fun. If wanting to avoid wet pants a second choice is naked peeing somewhere other than the bathroom after her being desperate and about to wet her pants . I have just one rule, don't leave a mess for others to clean up or damage their property. 

My now ex-wife said pee play did nothing for her, but she was willing to indulge me. It helped me to open up to her when I realized , she often held her pee until the last minute. We were a couple since we were seventeen.  She also enjoyed sex with a full bladder. So after a evening at a club and drinking without peeing we would get busy as soon as we got home. It drove me nuts when I asked her how she felt and she replied , her pee feels like it is going to come out, but it feels to good to stop. She said if it did start coming out she would not stop the sex, so the bed would get wet. For the record I only remember once feeling one quick spurt on my dick .

 

Edited by wettingman
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6 hours ago, wettingman said:

I think it is awesome that you want to learn about your husbands pee fetish and want to indulge him, and perhaps find you enjoy pee play yourself.

As you probably by now from previous comments, why he  enjoys this is not the right question. It is difficult to answer. Not many can answer that. There have many discussions on line about that topic, both here and other pee sites. I now realize that my first interest in female desperation came at the pre-sex age of six, seeing a girl desperate.  I talked her into holding it a bit longer; she soon wet her pants .It grew exponentially when I reached puberty, and even more when I discovered the internet. I am now sixty-eight , still enjoy it, and I accept that. I can say it seems to stem from the fact that my own desperation, and feeling I am about to pee is similar to the pressure I feel when I am about to cum . Of course ejaculating if hot and tingly too rather than bladder and penis pressure. Why am I wired this way? I don't know, so I just embrace it.

The correct question what specifically turns him on. You could get some insight by the things discussed in the chats you discovered. There is a wide range of what we enjoy about peeing. Some things I find gross but I accept the preferences of others that accept mine. You could ask him if he wants you to hold your pee for him, and what would arouse him when you finally peed.

Personally, as my screen name  suggests I LOVE female desperation and pants wetting, when she can no longer hold it in anymore. I also enjoy her  to like watching me do the same. It is extra special if we can both be desperate and wet our pants together ( to keep it real not necessarily simultaneously). A true she almost made it with just wet underwear is also fun. If wanting to avoid wet pants a second choice is naked peeing somewhere other than the bathroom after her being desperate and about to wet her pants . I have just one rule, don't leave a mess for others to clean up or damage their property. 

My now ex-wife said pee play did nothing for her, but she was willing to indulge me. It helped me to open up to her when I realized , she often held her pee until the last minute. We were a couple since we were seventeen.  She also enjoyed sex with a full bladder. So after a evening at a club and drinking without peeing we would get busy as soon as we got home. It drove me nuts when I asked her how she felt and she replied , her pee feels like it is going to come out, but it feels to good to stop. She said if it did start coming out she would not stop the sex, so the bed would get wet. For the record I only remember once feeling one quick spurt on my dick .

 

I have noticed that it feels amazing with a full bladder. I am just learning and enjoying as I go with him. I know he would do the same with an interest of mine, so I give him the pleasure he wants. 

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7 hours ago, CraftyPee said:

he had mentioned a time or two about me peeing outside when we had been out drinking, but I didn’t think about it. Now that I know, I know why he just casually mentioned it. I feel bad that I didn’t indulge sooner

You really shouldn't feel bad for not indulge him sooner - it sounds like he just mentioned it rather than asked you to do it.  The likely scenario (I'm guessing) is that you had been drinking and either you had mentioned you needed a pee or he just guessed that you would have a full bladder from your drinking.   He just suggested that you might pee outside, but you would have taken that as him making suggestions to make you more comfortable (i.e. relieve your bladder), whilst that probably was the case, he was more than likely getting excited to think that he may get to see you peeing outside.   You responded in the way you thought appropriate at the time.  You obviously were confident that you could make it home and thought that was the right thing to do.   So don't feel guilty.

Even if he had asked you to pee outside, if it is not something that you are comfortable to do then you shouldn't feel guilty about not doing it.  Nobody should push anyone into doing something that they don't want to do.   However, if it is a case of actually you are OK with the idea of peeing outdoors but just didn't do it then by all means experiment and pee outside - you may want to try it on your own in different places, you may want to use facetime as you mentioned, or you may want to take the opportunity when you are with him.   From what you have said, I am absolutely sure that he would love it if (for example) you were having a few drinks at a pub.  Got to the point where you needed to pee.  Told him you needed to pee.  Had another drink and then said "right - let's head home".   At this point he will already have been enjoying the knowledge that you need to pee, realise that you haven't been to the toilet and then be optimistic about the trip home.   Whilst walking home, you mention a couple of times how desperate you are, then say to him "I don't think I'm going to make it home - can you find me somewhere to go?"  At this point, his pulse has increased and there are stirrings below.  Then either you or him spot a suitable alley/car park/bush/any other reasonably secluded location, hitch up your skirt or lower your trousers and flood the floor.  He will be over the moon.

7 hours ago, CraftyPee said:

Since I have been open and enjoying it with him, he enjoys hearing about the times I have peed outside in my days before him and those conversations always end delightfully! 

This absolutely confirms the above.  He is really interested in when you have peed outside before and would love the opportunity to see it now.   I don't want to pry, but if you used to pee outside before you met him, presumably that means you are open to the idea.  I don't know whether you used to pee outside because you were an active outdoor person or used to get drunk and have to pee on the way home from a club or whatever.  Maybe the circumstances haven't arisen again since you met him, but if you are willing to engineer them them he will definitely appreciate it.   

7 hours ago, CraftyPee said:

I have even stopped on the way home from work and FaceTimed him so he could watch. I am fully open to it with him. 

That is brilliant.  I bet that he is so pleased that you now know about his interest and hopefully this will lead you both to enjoy things together more.

 

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13 hours ago, Alfresco said:

You really shouldn't feel bad for not indulge him sooner - it sounds like he just mentioned it rather than asked you to do it.  The likely scenario (I'm guessing) is that you had been drinking and either you had mentioned you needed a pee or he just guessed that you would have a full bladder from your drinking.   He just suggested that you might pee outside, but you would have taken that as him making suggestions to make you more comfortable (i.e. relieve your bladder), whilst that probably was the case, he was more than likely getting excited to think that he may get to see you peeing outside.   You responded in the way you thought appropriate at the time.  You obviously were confident that you could make it home and thought that was the right thing to do.   So don't feel guilty.

Even if he had asked you to pee outside, if it is not something that you are comfortable to do then you shouldn't feel guilty about not doing it.  Nobody should push anyone into doing something that they don't want to do.   However, if it is a case of actually you are OK with the idea of peeing outdoors but just didn't do it then by all means experiment and pee outside - you may want to try it on your own in different places, you may want to use facetime as you mentioned, or you may want to take the opportunity when you are with him.   From what you have said, I am absolutely sure that he would love it if (for example) you were having a few drinks at a pub.  Got to the point where you needed to pee.  Told him you needed to pee.  Had another drink and then said "right - let's head home".   At this point he will already have been enjoying the knowledge that you need to pee, realise that you haven't been to the toilet and then be optimistic about the trip home.   Whilst walking home, you mention a couple of times how desperate you are, then say to him "I don't think I'm going to make it home - can you find me somewhere to go?"  At this point, his pulse has increased and there are stirrings below.  Then either you or him spot a suitable alley/car park/bush/any other reasonably secluded location, hitch up your skirt or lower your trousers and flood the floor.  He will be over the moon.

This absolutely confirms the above.  He is really interested in when you have peed outside before and would love the opportunity to see it now.   I don't want to pry, but if you used to pee outside before you met him, presumably that means you are open to the idea.  I don't know whether you used to pee outside because you were an active outdoor person or used to get drunk and have to pee on the way home from a club or whatever.  Maybe the circumstances haven't arisen again since you met him, but if you are willing to engineer them them he will definitely appreciate it.   

That is brilliant.  I bet that he is so pleased that you now know about his interest and hopefully this will lead you both to enjoy things together more.

 

Yeah I had only peed outside as an adult when I had drank a lot and wasn’t in a place where a bathroom was near. He is a truck driver so I had peed in various places while on trips with him when I desperately had to go. He has since told me how hot he found those encounters and had just kept it to himself. 
 

He was very pleased with that surprise and I am diving in head first to experience it with him. 

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Hi @CraftyPee - Just been reading the various recent conversations here, and wow - what an amazing mini journey for you and your husband.

There are many of us in your hubby's situation - we have this fetish we feel wouldn't be understood. We think that those closest to us would misunderstand and be hurt by our desires, the last thing we want is to hurt anyone we love. There's the element of secrecy because we feel we'd be laughed at, or because we'd lose the ones we love. There's also a strong feeling that we don't want to embarrass or humiliate them. It's important to understand that this kink doesn't turn us into robots, we don't become psychopaths because of it. It's by no means the be-all-and-end-all of our existence.

The examples you've quoted where your husband suggested peeing somewhere where there wasn't a bathroom - from everything you've said your husband sounds like a great partner, and I'd stick my neck out and think that first and foremost he didn't want you to be in discomfort and was trying to say 'it's ok to relieve yourself here, you'll feel much better'.  To him peeing outdoors is a no brainer, and clearly from all the imagery and discussions from other members it's no issue for a lady either.

An outsider may think of a monster who created a situation of desperation for his own kicks despite the pain and embarrassment for you and for the sole reason of manipulating you into a situation which turns him on.  For many of us that couldn't be further from the truth. Many people I've chatted to here have all expressed the same view - sure we enjoy seeing the tell tale signs of a person visibly needing to pee and we enjoy the thought of them then peeing. Sometimes it may be in 'unconventional ways' but one thing we've agreed on is that once it becomes upsetting to the person then we struggle to derive any pleasure from it.

Hopefully I'm telling you everything you already know there - just wanted to be clear that we don't stop caring and loving those closest to us, and I'd suggest our love for them still comes first. 

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