Site Question / Help Not a dating site.

[Admin 14,790]

On 10/30/2019 at 6:22 AM, gldenwetgoose said:

Firstly are new members going straight to chatbox and asking for photos to be DM'd or participation in other one-to-one comms with members, and the other night one asking repeatedly in German.  Surely our forum is built on open sharing and the exclusive DM facility being for the benefit of online friends?

Yes, we are an English language only forum and that member was banned after ignoring my message informing him of that. 

As for people asking for messages, I have stressed several times in several places we are not a dating site, but ultimately most new members don't read all the rules and guidelines and miss all of this information. So please feel free to politely inform members of their mistake, or if it happens again then you can report them.

We rely on all members letting the moderators know of any issues, as if we know about them we'll deal with them. 🙂 It seems a lot of members don't like reporting things, but if people did it would make such a big difference to pretty much every single issue people have brought forward.

 

On 10/30/2019 at 6:22 AM, gldenwetgoose said:

The other thing is, a few times when a new name appears I've looked at their profiles as a means of looking whether they have posted an intro - often there seem to be (males) starting their path here by following lady members - often names who haven't been active for a year or so.

 

The follow feature just means they'll more easily be able to see posts from that user - I realise the term sounds a little intense but it doesn't make any difference to the user being 'followed'. It's like with Twitter.

On 10/30/2019 at 6:22 AM, gldenwetgoose said:

 I do wonder if DMs and Chat should be 'locked' until a certain modest points score has been achieved - if that is technically possible?

That's a good idea. I've set it so you need 5 posts to be able to PM someone, as from those 5 posts we'll get a better idea if they are actually here for the right reasons. Anyone spamming those 5 posts or evidently trying to misuse this site as a dating site will have their account deleted. 🙂 

I can't stress enough though - anyone getting unwanted PM's, please just use the report button and it will be dealt with every single time. 

[Peefreak99 3,722]

1 hour ago, Admin said:

Yes, we are an English language only forum and that member was banned after ignoring my message informing him of that. 

As for people asking for messages, I have stressed several times in several places we are not a dating site, but ultimately most new members don't read all the rules and guidelines and miss all of this information. So please feel free to politely inform members of their mistake, or if it happens again then you can report them.

We rely on all members letting the moderators know of any issues, as if we know about them we'll deal with them. 🙂 It seems a lot of members don't like reporting things, but if people did it would make such a big difference to pretty much every single issue people have brought forward.

 

The follow feature just means they'll more easily be able to see posts from that user - I realise the term sounds a little intense but it doesn't make any difference to the user being 'followed'. It's like with Twitter.

That's a good idea. I've set it so you need 5 posts to be able to PM someone, as from those 5 posts we'll get a better idea if they are actually here for the right reasons. Anyone spamming those 5 posts or evidently trying to misuse this site as a dating site will have their account deleted. 🙂 

I can't stress enough though - anyone getting unwanted PM's, please just use the report button and it will be dealt with every single time. 

Im not a mod but anytime i see a newbie do something wrong i inform them. Politely ofc im not a rude guy haha but i di always worry that i will get yelled at by a mod for doing their job mabye other members do the same and dont do anything lor that reasson 

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

Thanks @Admin - much appreciated.  You guys work so hard to keep this place the vibrant active community it is today and we probably never thank any of you enough.  So from me at least "THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO"

I agree with @Peefreak99, and I'll try and do the same - it's always a fine line between encouraging someone that there's a better topic for that post or perhaps a different approach that could be more effective versus just discouraging and coming over haughtily.

[Sophie 24,410]

Just to add on to what Admin has said, please don't ever feel like you are being a burden or bothering us by reporting something. When something is reported we get a little notification telling us about it and it is greatly appreciated! We don't always see every post so it's wonderful getting told about them, and if we get a report it will be looked at. 

Even if you are unsure, hit the button anyway! We don't mind and we're not going to tell you off if it didn't break any rules. I'd rather you let us know. 

[steve25805 126,116]

On 11/2/2019 at 10:03 PM, Peefreak99 said:

Im not a mod but anytime i see a newbie do something wrong i inform them. Politely ofc im not a rude guy haha but i di always worry that i will get yelled at by a mod for doing their job mabye other members do the same and dont do anything lor that reasson 

Politely informing someone of where they have transgressed is not something mods will get uppity about. It kind of helps us out really. Repeat offenders or particularly bad offenders of course should be reported to us.

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

Wow, the force is strong tonight.  Left, right and centre seems to be newbie introductions:  "Hi, I'm a guy - just joined, never posted before, but want all you ladies to come and piss on me".

Call me old fashioned, but at least offer to buy the girl a drink first. 😉

 

[Riley 13,064]

On 10/6/2019 at 9:28 AM, Peefreak99 said:

What bothers me sometimes is that the chatbox if full of " i need to pee" " have you peed today?" Etc i know this is a pee site but the chatbox to me is for being social not to tallk about pee ( all the time) mabye we should have 2 chats?

sorry i know this is late but this was one of my reasons for making the live pee chat in the real pee section. I thought it would make a live area where people could do live holds and such without making the chatbox the place for that

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

Totally agree - I know of at least one member who very recently also expressed the same view (more strongly).  They are evidence that in their case they avoid taking part in chat and find that such repetitive posts seriously detracts from their enjoyment of their site.

Plus having a dedicated thread means it's captured for history, rather than just a passing conversation.

(Just to add a thought @Admin - if it's a concern to others too, would it be worth renaming the existing chatbox as something like  'Clean Chat'. After all there are separate 'dry' and wet' forum topic areas and the chat is located at the highest level so outside the specific wet areas?)

Edited November 11, 2019 by gldenwetgoose

[likesToLick 10,216]

59 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

(Just to add a thought @Admin - if it's a concern to others too, would it be worth renaming the existing chatbox as something like  'Clean Chat'. After all there are separate 'dry' and wet' forum topic areas and the chat is located at the highest level so outside the specific wet areas?)

Not sure that everyone would thank you for this.  I was chatting to one of our most popular female members in there a couple of years ago.  I was carefully keeping to a non-sexual topic where we have a mutual interest,  when she quite deliberately changed the subject and talked to me about peeing.  I don't think she would have welcomed being censored.

This is a sexually oriented forum about peeing.  It would seem wrong to ban the main topic of the forum in its only chatroom.

[Riley 13,064]

9 hours ago, likesToLick said:

Not sure that everyone would thank you for this.  I was chatting to one of our most popular female members in there a couple of years ago.  I was carefully keeping to a non-sexual topic where we have a mutual interest,  when she quite deliberately changed the subject and talked to me about peeing.  I don't think she would have welcomed being censored.

This is a sexually oriented forum about peeing.  It would seem wrong to ban the main topic of the forum in its only chatroom.

 

10 hours ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Totally agree - I know of at least one member who very recently also expressed the same view (more strongly).  They are evidence that in their case they avoid taking part in chat and find that such repetitive posts seriously detracts from their enjoyment of their site.

Plus having a dedicated thread means it's captured for history, rather than just a passing conversation.

(Just to add a thought @Admin - if it's a concern to others too, would it be worth renaming the existing chatbox as something like  'Clean Chat'. After all there are separate 'dry' and wet' forum topic areas and the chat is located at the highest level so outside the specific wet areas?)

Idk if renaming it clean chat but just kind of keeping it in mind might be a more general thing. My hope for the live pee chat was the you could always ask do you want to talk in the live pee chat. Or just @ them in that chat. Idk i do think having a more clean vs dirty chat might be nice but idk if we need a hard line, just like if you notice the conversation is drifitng that direction, maybe just ask if you want to talk in the pee live chat. Idk its just an idea. sorry

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

Fair enough....   It's amazing having a community with so many people - all a common link and at the same time subtly different and diverse twists.  I agree it's never great to have censorship - at the same time not wanting people being put off interacting freely.  What attracts one person may well discourage another.  Ce la vie (did I spell that right?).

 I was just conscious of three people all voicing the same opinion - but of course site rules are quite correctly not to discourage or put down another. 

[Sophie 24,410]

I will admit, I completely stop participating in the chatbox and will actively avoid starting a conversation there if I see certain members are active. I understand I could add them to my ignore list and not see their messages but that feels irresponsible as a moderator. 

I'm sure I'm not the only person who leaves when certain members show up. 

[Sophie 24,410]

51 minutes ago, gldenwetgoose said:

Ce la vie (did I spell that right?).

C'est la vie

[steve25805 126,116]

1 hour ago, Sophie said:

I will admit, I completely stop participating in the chatbox and will actively avoid starting a conversation there if I see certain members are active. I understand I could add them to my ignore list and not see their messages but that feels irresponsible as a moderator. 

I'm sure I'm not the only person who leaves when certain members show up. 

There are some who show up there only for a cheap thrill. It is all they are interested in, beyond which they give not a single shit about genuine socialising. Such members are tiresome as an observer, but they must be most irritating for females who are on the receiving end of their self centred pervings.

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

3 hours ago, Sophie said:

C'est la vie

I speak French in the same way as Del Boy, and to the same extent.

[oliver2 4,419]

Just now, gldenwetgoose said:

I speak French in the same way as Del Boy, and to the same extent.

“I did not describe myself as a cunning linguist. You misheard”

[Guest UnabashedUser]

8 hours ago, Sophie said:

 

I'm sure I'm not the only person who leaves when certain members show up. 

No, you're not :)

[will64 6,329]

18 hours ago, Sophie said:

I will admit, I completely stop participating in the chatbox and will actively avoid starting a conversation there if I see certain members are active. I understand I could add them to my ignore list and not see their messages but that feels irresponsible as a moderator. 

I'm sure I'm not the only person who leaves when certain members show up. 

No you not the only one everytime i see a certain member I just can't be bothered 

Edited November 12, 2019 by will64

[Peefreak99 3,722]

On 11/2/2019 at 11:03 PM, Peefreak99 said:

Im not a mod but anytime i see a newbie do something wrong i inform them. Politely ofc im not a rude guy haha but i do always worry that i will get yelled at by a mod for doing their job mabye other members do the same and dont do anything lor that reasson 

 

[gldenwetgoose 21,495]

2 hours ago, Peefreak99 said:

 

Totally agree @Peefreak99 - Politely informing is exactly what the Mods have suggested everyone does - it came up a few days ago and as one (Sophie???) said, they don't see every conversation.  As long as we all remain polite and constructive it is a helpful thing.

[spywareonya 37,962]

I strongly agree with all  of the above. To be honest I have a morbid fascination for helping and welcoming Others, like I was designed by existence to be filled with everything they have to share, bullshit included, at worst I tell these persons that some attitudes would have to be fixed & I just do not have enough time/energy to help. Usually they understand

[Admin 14,790]

Thanks for some really great input, feedback and suggestions everyone! 🙂 

 Just a few quick thoughts:

• Definitely no plans to segregate the chat - after al lwe're a pee site so we don't want to rule out the topic going to that if it happens naturally and willingly, and I think one big active chat is always better.
• BUT do let me (or mods) know if there are members who are using the forum as a dating site and not a community - we don't want that and you are definitely welcome to let new members know this, as often they simply don't know any better as haven't read the rules/welcome posts. Myself and the mods don't mind you letting people know as long as it's done in a friendly way. 
• However, if it's more that you just don't particularly like comments from certain members, you can add them to your ignore list. There really is no need to be feeling fed up with certain members when you can stop seeing all of their posts with just a few simple clicks. https://peefans.com/ignore 
• The only exception is if you are receiving inappropriate dating-type messages via private message, please report this rather than trying to deal with it yourself, as the chances are that user is sending similar things to other people that we don't know about. 
• Any other issues/concerns, feel free to pm me any time. Thanks!