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D Lydia

Member
  • Content Count

    34
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Community Reputation

66 Excellent

About D Lydia

  • Rank
    Active Member
  • Birthday December 1

Personal Information

  • Gender
    straight/bi male (and sometimes femme)
  • Occupation
    engineer
  • Age
    55
  • Location
    Midwest
  • About Me
    I love cross-dressing, and obviously if I'm part of this forum, I love peeing in my pants and being peed on (and eventually, I get to dress up in silk lingerie as a reward for being naughty). For me it's all about feeling humiliated (privately, indoors only) and I'm also very into golden showers, but I've never had one - except from a "squirty peter". I'm in the closet with the pee fantasies (until I find someone who is also into it, or very understanding), but many girlfriends have dressed me up. I'm a geek/nerd, very tech-oriented, I play keyboards, love animals and help with their rescue when needed.

Pee Profile

  • Favourite Thing About Pee
    wetting myself, being peed on, (private) humiliation/submission, forced cross-dressing, taboo
  • Hottest Pee Experience
    I'm peeing in my pants right now (wearing panties, plastic panties over them) and jeans... and now looking to talk to others who like the same. I think the plastic panties make it a LOT more fun, as they hold a lot of pee and let me soak in it (and they slosh when I walk around, but they will drip down my legs, so I wear jeans over them to absorb it and I can wear it.

Recent Profile Visitors

1,395 profile views
  1. Welcome!!! You will feel very comfortable with the folks in this forum. We don't judge, and we all have our own unique preferences, but you will never feel like people reject you because of what you like - we all like pee in one form or another, or we wouldn't be here, so feel free to loosen up a little and tell us about yourself. 🙂
  2. Wow those are some cruel people you were dealing with. It makes me wonder, though, just how bad THEIR fetishes were that they had to make themselves feel better by giving you a hard time. Usually when someone goes as far as they did, it's because they're diverting attention away from themselves and whatever they are hiding. I keep my fetishes secret (well, I told several girlfriends about the dressing, and one about the pee, and she was thankful I shared it with her but we didn't get far into exploring that one - tho she took great pleasure in dressing me up)., I'm pretty sure there are people in my past who saw something they weren't supposed to see when visiting, but no one ever did anything like what you experienced. I hope one day you find someone who, instead of having to risk sharing it (which it sounds like you won't) - I hope that person shares the same thing with you, which I think would be ideal for anyone. I'd love to have a partner tell me they want to soak me, and of course, the door is open to share that part of me. You are among friends here, and you can talk about things. I've revealed more about myself here than I ever thought I would with anyone (except for that one girlfriend), and I've never felt anything but acceptance, or even better than that (some people think it's HOT!). It gives me a bit more confidence if I ever meet anyone where I think it might be okay to hint at one or more of my kinks. Per being lonely/isolated - I love being alone and I love my solitude - both give me freedom and not headaches. Either of those could be considered loneliness or isolation, but I know them as being alone and solitude - and in those I find peace, not pain.
  3. Yea, lol, I love the way it feels when it runs down my legs, or if I'm sitting in it, the way it pools. Jeans are nice to just wear it. :)
  4. I would do the exact same thing. But keep in mind, her pee has her hormones. 🙂 I am definitely with you on being on the receiving end of pee play.
  5. You are such good company, my fellow shameful fetishist. Not to worry, you are among understanding friends. One thing that helped me over my own personal shame was, when I realized how many different fetishes there were and how I considered them outrageous only because they were so much more intense and "different" (and some of them not that harmless, to say the least) - peeing is such a mainSTREAM thing to be into, and so many people, if properly introduced, can enjoy it. And I know, there are people out there who won't admit it, but they like it - even if just a drop here and a drop there, they find a way. I learned that here, in this forum. 🙂
  6. Oh wow, I had a chance to answer this question and I still think you put it in the best words (except our difference in the shame). Nice and concise. But... What would life be like (as you said, "simpler") without a nice harmless fetish? I've always found that it's the one place I can go in my mind (and wherever else) where I can do anything I want - alone or with someone else - and I think everyone here, like me, is far more complicated and can't just be that "simpler". I hated that my fetishes were there (and couldn't do anything about them) - I came to realize that they are part of a much larger picture of who a person actually is, sexually, intellectually, whatever... so I indulge in any way I can, and enjoy. I'm not a simple person. Neither is anyone reading this. 🙂
  7. There are so many emoji's out there right now, and I'm never sure what any of them mean besides the basics from long ago. Emoji's aren't the only way to express your feelings, or what you want to offer someone else, and I've found that something like "{{hugs}}" or whatever - that's totally clear to me. Even with a limited selection of emoji's (or an infinite way of trying to say something to someone else) - whatever emoji you choose - words will go so much farther. I'd rather read someone's words (emoji's appreciated since I know someone reacted) - but words (remember those old-fashioned things?) still go very far - and in some cases, they have more value than a picture (which is worth a thousand words) D
  8. When you work out and your muscles get bigger, all that extra size is scar tissue - that's what makes you stronger. I think emotional pain is one of the best workouts for the mind (as unpleasant as it is) because it forces you to come to terms with something, or be in pain until you can redefine it. You're in (urine?) the right community to get support and help with avoiding some of those mines, and helping provide support to offset the pain. No one is without that darkness and feeling of hopelessness - some deal with it, or hide it, better than others, but everyone has it - it's always there, and it does serve a purpose (though at any given time, it's difficult to know what that purpose is). You're among friends here, and yes, we will help however we can. And we'll never judge - after all, we don't want anyone judging us. While I hate to quote that song with "gray skies are gonna clear up, put on a happy face" - I have to say, in my darkest times, I find that looking at myself in the mirror and putting on the silliest grin and funniest face (yes, it can take some effort) results in my finding some laughs, where I can't find them anywhere else - and for at least that moment, I feel a little better and a little better-equipped to handle things. Hope this helps, hang in there... like day and night, light follow darkness and darkness follows light. (hmm, didn't mean to make a rhyme of that). XXOO D
  9. Thanks, glad you liked them. 🙂 After the 4 beers and lots of water (just the other night), I held it in for another couple hours, wondering why I wasn't yet bursting. Once I let loose (sitting on the couch, and trying to make sure the couch doesn't get wet - not always successful at that), I sat in it for a while, knowing I wasn't done and I'd have to pee more, so... why bother changing (unless, of course, I wanted to be wearing dry pants and see them get wet). For the other pics, I held it as long as I could - especially knowing I wanted to pee my pants and take pics of it. Most of them show me in the process and not when I'm done, but they're the best I have to offer. 🙂 For all of the other times I've peed my pants, I wait until I really really have to go and know that I'll be able to relieve myself and get nice and wet (even if I get turned on and it becomes a lot harder to pee).
  10. Even in my mid-fifties (I no longer wake up with something that is armor-piercing)... A day without an orgasm just isn't a proper day. I can't fall asleep unless I get off first. On my worst days ever (like, who masturbates while in incredible pain, or during mourning, or any other time where you really want to say to yourself "really, even today???" - well, yea!!! If I can't, the pain of the day will stay with me. It's such an easy way to relieve tension, explore yourself, and best of all - find new ways of understanding what you like. I masturbate EVERY day, at least once, and hopefully more and more. I'm human, I'm a mammal, and the sex drive is as loud now as it ever was. I'd keep telling you more, but.... I gotta go jerk off, sorry...
  11. I mean, besides those walks I would take at night into the woods, knowing I wouldn't run into anyone. Still awake at 7:30AM, so I invented a reason to go to the store down the street. On the way back I pushed as hard as I could, and the warm wet spot soaked into my pants, and down my balls (sitting in the driver's seat). That's new. Took the long wat through the apartment parking lot and push more, and made sure I was nice and wet, and I could have to hide myself if I saw anyone. That's new. Pouring rain outside, so just a tiny bit of safety, but I still have to walk to my apartment (without being seen) and get inside. I made sure to fiddle with my keys while standing outside, in the rain, and pushed again as hard as I could, and this time it soaked all the way down to my socks before I could find the right key - ya, right. By the time I got inside, I was nice and wet (and not from the rain) - and it felt so good to risk the humiliation. And and all the while still wearing wet panties from peeing in them earlier - maybe they smell, they're definitely still wet (but won't soak through my pants) - but... I pissed my pants in public for the first time, hoping no one would see, and doing my best to be nonchalant about it. And I loved it. 🙂 D
  12. I developed a really strong bladder since ever since I can remember, I can't share a public toilet (men's room, urinals, whatever) so back then, it was just too easy to pee my pants when I wanted to. The most embarrassing place I ever peed my pants is pretty sublime compared to other stories - I had just got home from a long commute and I had to pee so bad that my seatbelt was torturing me. I got to the front door of the apartment building, and got all the way to my front door, and as I fiddled with my keys... two things happened: one - I couldn't hold it any longer two - that little voice in the back of my head said "do it!!!" So, standing outside my own front door, knowing that someone else might walk by as I was unlocking my door - I let go... and then I couldn't stop, so I wound up soaking my pants and making a puddle on the floor outside, as I struggled to get to privacy. Eventually, I just calmed down, listened to that sound it makes when I'm in full flow and peeing so much that it pools in my underpants/panties before soaking down my legs and even into my shoes... I'm so glad no one saw me, or noticed. That was one of very few times I peed my pants when I wasn't totally safe inside my home. Once inside, I closed the door and pushed as hard as I could to make sure I was empty, and that I was soaking in it all (except the puddle outside my door). After that, every now and then I'd notice a subtle smell outside my door, and it would trigger the desire to pee in my pants every time. 🙂 I wish I had the courage others have, to be in public with such a secret. Sometimes I do go out, but with only the slightest hint of anything off - like, bra under my shirt, wet spot where no one should be able to see it... but I really like to keep this a secret. Until now, since I just told that story. 🙂 D
  13. Here's an idea... and I have to admit I do this sometimes when I know I'm going to be around others soon enough - Take off your pants, sit on the toilet and pee in your underpants (or panties, or whatever you like). Stay there long enough so it dries out enough that when you put your pants back on, it won't soak through and you won't have to be worried about others seeing what you did. The only clue - there's a bit of a scent to it - no one will think much of it, but you'll know and it will be your secret in the company of others. Another idea (and I've done this) - take off your shoes and pee just a little bit into each, and then put them back on (your socks will get wet, so wrong time to play Twister) but no one will notice or even think twice if they do. If nothing else, you cal always be really really subtle, and just get a drop here, a drop there, and let it dry enough so it doesn't show, but you KNOW!!! Happy peeing and hiding it!! :)
  14. Hi - I am very new, and quite surprised at how open and friendly this group is, so I immediately joined and got a gold membership (or "golden"?). My profile says I'm into wetting myself and being peed on - I guess that makes me a urinal? Then, there's the cross-dressing too... I'm hoping this will help put a bunch of pics in the same place, and I would love any feedback you have about them - and, I want to answer any questions others might have (ASK ME!!! I WANT TO ANSWER) - as long as I can keep my privacy, I really want to tell people who I really am. 🙂 You may have seen my profile pic, which is this one, where I am in the middle of a wetting session (taking my time, peeing as little or as much as I need to, and holding the rest) - pink silk bra, pink silk pajama tops, pink high heels, and yes, I'm wearing tights over my panties, and of course, jeans so I can enjoy wearing it - this was taken during a session, and I just had to see what I looked like - this is a pic in the middle of it - Sorry about the wrinkles, but this is my silk camisole over my bra, and this time I'm wearing cotton panties and thigh-high nylons (silk reflections, you gotta try them if you like nylons!!!) - this is a pic in the middle of it - When my pants are this shiny, it's because the pee is still soaking in and running down my legs - this is a pic during it flowing, when I can't hold it any longer - (pink silk bra and camisole, forget which panties, but nylons too) - I this one, I'm just wearing cotton panties and a cotton bra, and as you can see, I really had to go - this is a pic after I've gone enough to feel better, but not done yet - still have a long way to go - Yes another session, yet more pee running down my legs and soaking in- I think I was wearing the same women's underwear and just put on fresh jeans to have them absorb more - Another session, same lingerie, but holding my crotch to let it pool in my pants as it ran down my legs - And most recently, where I posted about having 4 beers, 32 oz of water, and still had to wait until I could let go - here I am sitting on my couch (covered with plastic and towels, and the one I'm sitting on lets me enjoy soaking in warm pee for quite a while, as I wait for my bladder to complain again) - And if I stand up right now - And now... for anyone who likes the cross-dressing part.. as much as I love my lingerie, I also sometimes wear it when I want to be a urinal - I guess not much is sacred when it comes to the clothes I'm wearing when it's time for peeing - . And just to share my other big fetish, here's me in my favorite princess sissy dress - If you got this far, I really want to know what you think. 🙂 XXOO Deanna Lydia
  15. Thanks - in only a few days I've already found many like-minded people, very accepting and friendly (and sometimes naughty) and I feel right at home here. I even already got a gold membership so I can have more private chats with people and check out the galleries and everything else that's here. I've really enjoyed reading other people's posts, too, and it makes me feel like my own fetishes are as mainSTREAM as anyone elses (pun intended), even if not so openly discussed in the outside world.

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